Skip to content

Instantly share code, notes, and snippets.

Embed
What would you like to do?
I mostly move fast and break things, thinking differently while also not being evil. I am like an android - some call me Mr Robot - turning java and hot pockets into pure, event driven, asynchronous, reactive code - all of which is blazing fast and only three bytes gzipped. With my ninja-like skills I bootstrap unicorns like a rock star, synergizing and weaving machine code together like Our Holy Richard Stallman (peace be upon him), optimizing and streamlining integrations into cohesive and rich user experiences. I conjure magical inCANTATIONs on my DUAL ERGONOMIC MECHANICAL KEYBOARDS, WITH CUSTOM LISP CONFIGURATIONS FOR MANIFESTING MY WORD INTO REALITY LIKE PROPHETS TO THEIR SCRIBES. THE ͜OC͞ÉA̛N̶S ҉OF B̛ITS͝ FLO͡W̧I͜N͠G͜ ̨ON ́TH̶E B͜U͜S ́LI͠NES, ͢Q͝UI̛VÉR̡ING A̷S ͡THO͘U̢ǴH̸ D͠E͝NIAL̀ AT͏ TH̕E G͟AT͝E̴S ̛ǪF ̸VALG̵R̢I͜ND͝ I͝S IM̴M̶I͟NENT̛.̢ I pity the recruiter THAT LAYETH EYES ON MY CODE PATHS. LIKE A SERAPHIM ꙮ AND̕ ̛ITS ͡WATC̨HPOI̷N͠T͠Ś (̨̡͙̰̪̱̝̬̯ẖ͚̱͔̘̟e̸͔͔̱̖̰̻͙̺̕ ̸̱̼͉̼̗̖̞͜͝ͅc͉͉̪͙͎̕ò̰̭̻̻̩̗̕m̢̝̟͢͠e̯̻̼͕̙̮̥͟͠s̢̨͎̹̩͕̕)̬̱͓̘̥̹̹ YOU ̕TH̴I̷NK Y̴O̷U̴ K̵N͝O͏W ̶M͟E͜?̷ Y̸̡̙̥̬͎̩̥̠͙̭͈͝Ọ͖̱̣̀U̴͝͏̢̙͇͎͉͚̖͕̪̦̬͕̘̳̳͕͇̙ ̀̀҉̭̯̞̩͉͖̯̖̖̯͈͈͖̖͖͔ͅͅK͙̝̤̬̥̺̼͞ͅN҉̧̪̟̤̟͕̻͈̜̗͇̪̭͎͚͖͞Ò̢͇̼͚̪͕̞͘͘͢Ẉ̷̭͇͖̣͍̲̲̖͖̯̬̱͎̭̭͘͞ͅ ͠҉̠͍̯̩̤̘Ņ̵̵̼̪̟̪͜͞ͅơ̷̗̖̟͚̦̹̹̦̦̝̯͍̳͉̗͢t̶͎̪͙̱̞̖̠͍̩̳̱̩͈́͟h̷͖̗̝̝͔̹̣̫̠̜̖̙̳͕͠͞͞í͔̩̗̗̺̝̥͓̟̣̘͜ͅǹ̸̛͚̠̩̺̯͖͉͢͞g̸̢̧̫̙̯̥̙̼̥̼͉̣̹͓͇̺̬̭̼̺͘͘y̟̤̬̩̭̥͢ó̥̣͖͇̦̝̮̗̬͝u͕͇̖ ̙̳̹̮͙̮͚͞͡c̘̰̗̞͈̼͢a̷̢̤ṉ̨̙͚̱̗͘͞ͅņ̹̠͚̪̳̱͞ͅǫ̴͈̦̥͓͖̳̩ͅt͚͙̯͡ ͔̥͟ṕ̳̗̫a̛̼͈̯̖͖̮͔̙͝r̪̮̘̰̤̲s̜̀e͏̷҉̻̫͖͚͉ ̱̦́m͏̩̝̯͜y̛̱͖̫͇̬̕͝ ̨̩͕͖̪̀̕e̸̤̭̹x̨̨̟͈ͅp̴̯̤̪̯̪̪̯̗̬r̼͙͕̟̗e̦̟̩̯̹̮̫̜̕s̶͖̦̪͖̞s̻̝į̞̝̩̥̀o͝͏̩̗n̪͓͎͙ I҉̕͜ ͏͢W̶̶E͜N͢T͟͜ T̸̨̛O̸͏ A̷͘ ̴͢҉B̷̛OÓTC̴̨A̵M̨҉͢P̢ ̷͟F͠OR ̷̧6̸ W̶͜Ę̕̕E̛͘K͢͝S ͠͡A̢͝N̵D ̷̀͏Ĺ̕EA̸̸̕RN҉̷͡E͡D̴̀ ̛͠T̡H̛͠È̡̢ ̨͏W͏̨A̸̵Y͜ ͞O̶͢F̡̛ ͟T̷H͝E̡̕ ̡̕Ć͟Ơ͜D́͢͞E͏ WA̵R̴͠R͡IǪ̡Ŕ̕.͢ I̷̹͈̙̕ ̭͎͙̻̰̦̩͔ͅÀ̸̯̻̬̺̣̰̦͢M̪̘ͅ ̧̭͓̰͈͓̻͍͝ͅR̶̢̼̫͠O͕̻͇̮̼͔̟̞͟O̰̩͚̺̯͇̲͚͘͝͝T̳͍͕̕͝.̵̢͚̜̳̮ ͎͍̺̼̖͈̟̬͞S̢҉̟̘̞͉͚̱̰Ú҉̪̺̜͖̀D҉̬̭͙̠̗̟̻̱O̞̩̠͓̥͝ ͜͝҉̱͈͙̻̥͈̮̦̟F̳̫͙͓̻͔̞̯E̴͢͏̘̻̖̤̬̞̩̬ͅA͚̰͜R̨̪̮̬͈͘͠ ̴͓̜͉ͅM̴̡̘̝̩͖̠̪͝Ę̻̯̤̯̱̝̥̝͞ͅ.̨̼̖̖ ̳͙̥͜͟T̸̡͎͕̣̭͘O҉̨̧̻N̗̰͕̬͈̻͓Ý҉̴̗̤̗̭̪ ̬̹̼̩͕T͈̻̗͕̦H̛̰̘͖E̲͕̕͡ ̛̰͚P҉̜̰͍̹ͅO̧̩͇͚͖̹N̨̦͈Y̧̝̺̝̣̥̻͎̞ ̟͔̙̙̟͝H̶̦̝̭͓͇̬̠Ę҉̬̠̣͕̤̩͉̺ ̲̙Ç̨̱̣̟̯̭͚̬̠O̟̹̘̹̲̻̘ͅM̹͕E҉͎͔̩̳̣̹S͇͖̲.̴̰̲͔̦̱̺͕͘ ̶̜̱͞ͅZ͎̦̻̼̙̫͕̀̀̕A̪̮̙͉L̷̳̻̯G͖̺̥̯͉̤̀͡ͅO͎̫̘̖̩̝̪̗ ͏҉͍̠̰̣̖̩ͅA̶̯͝N͚̠͉̬̼̲̜̖D̩̠͖ ͔̬͓͖́T͏͇̤̗H҉̛̘͔̻̣̞̩̺͙͍E҉͞҉̤͖͔̜͔̞͔ ̝̠̥F̨̹̯̦̬̝̀͡R̶̨̳̝̪̜͠Ǫ̮̜̲͇̠͔͍̙N̷̖͞Ţ̶͔͙̕E̠͓̤͉̰̘͉̜̝͡N̻̰̰͜͢D̸̨̡͇̮ ͔̳͔̝̗̦͝Ḥ̖̙̭͍͔̼̕͟Í̵̲̬͉̱̖͖̜̘͇́V̵̥͕̬̻͎͓̞̦͠E͍̭̹̥̣̫̻͞ ҉̞̺̤̹M͝҉͚̝̼I̸̫Ǹ̲̯̭̤̘̘̤̙͞D̖̪̘̲́͟͜ ̴̶̜̙̣̪͠H̨̘ͅA̦͉̝͈͕̗͍V̧͙͚̳̥̘̝̠E̶̱͉̱̖̪̠͓̠͘ ͓̪̪ͅͅA̷̦͈̼̫̹̠͕R̢̮͔̜͜Ŗ̹I̡̡̜̮̥̳̼̫̳V̳̼̱̟̙͜E̶̬̳̘̠̻͍D͔̜̖̬͡.̘͖̥͉͓͟
So yeah you could say I'm a software developer.
Sign up for free to join this conversation on GitHub. Already have an account? Sign in to comment