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I told someone I am going to use a competitor instead of their service. This is the response I got. Care to guess who it was?
I will disown you and never reply to any IM ever
You will NEVER be welcome at any dinner or conference of mine!
You will be on the blacklist of every event I ever put on, ESPECIALLY the speaker dinners
I will set up an automatic daily tweet telling the world how bad your taste is
I'll bring up my kids to consider your children as enemies and systematically train them to compete with whatever they do
I will creep in to your house at night and replace all the balsamic vinegar with regular wine vinegar MIXED WITH CARAMEL
I'll put a heater in your wine cellar
I'll take each of your chickens, feed them poison, then mix them up and feed the poison chicken mix to the alpacas
I'll replace all of your Islay scotch with expensive stuff from Speyside but I'll be sure to add my "essence" before I do
I'll take all your favorite web services and make them switch to oauth 1.0
I'm going to start an oauth2 appreciation society and put your name as the honorary patron "Eran the inventor of oauth"
I'll hire a crack team of coffeescript developers and ask them to send you HUNDREDS of issues, in coffeescript every day
I'll take all your libraries, and rewrite them line by line in Ruby AND pass them off as my own
I'll email all of the chefs you know and tell them you've been bitching about them behind their backs

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othiym23 commented Nov 11, 2013

It wasn't me, but I'm taking notes! scribbles furiously

Line #11 is my favorite, but it was hard to choose.


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ericelliott commented Nov 27, 2013

Lol. Brilliant.

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