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Ranking @patio11's tweets at #microconf
Raw
rank-kalzumeus-microconf-tweets.txt
# fetch @patio11's tweets from microconf (roughly apr 3 on)
# signature generated from https://dev.twitter.com/rest/reference/get/statuses/user_timeline
curl --get 'https://api.twitter.com/1.1/statuses/user_timeline.json' --data 'count=200&screen_name=patio11&since_id=717036680947965953' --header 'Authorization: OAuth oauth_consumer_key="x6nmC5cEByCeyudJjVKsMA", oauth_nonce="56b83cf5f068e31996fc484364e99423", oauth_signature="0vY6VEDKTI2Bb8J09osG0yqTA6M%3D", oauth_signature_method="HMAC-SHA1", oauth_timestamp="1460264255", oauth_token="49019793-1cje0xH21w4OsEudjSXTIj1hDQhorGifIrfuBQ0Eb", oauth_version="1.0"' --verbose > tweets.json
# import into postgres
psql -d test -c "CREATE TABLE pgtweets (data json)"
psql -d test -c "COPY pgtweets FROM '$(pwd)/tweets.json'"
# total activity over these 200 tweets
select sum(cast(tweet->>'retweet_count' as integer)) as retweets
,sum(cast(tweet->>'favorite_count' as integer)) as favs
from (select json_array_elements(data) AS tweet from bmwcca.patio2) AS tweets
> retweets favs
> 856 2569
# rank tweets by favorites
select cast(tweet->>'favorite_count' as integer) as favs
,cast(tweet->>'retweet_count' as integer) as retweets
,tweet->>'text' as text
from (select json_array_elements(data) AS tweet from pgtweets) AS tweets
order by cast(tweet->>'favorite_count' as integer) desc
Raw
ranked-tweets.txt
Favs RTs Tweets
79 36 Real talk: If a SaaS company burned through $1 million, it was spent on engineers. If they burned $100 million, look at sales & marketing.
72 32 "Entrepreneurs are risk takers!" Yes and no. Many of us hate almost all risks but load the heck up on one or two we think we can control.
68 20 "If you're not solving one of your customer's top three problems, you're going to have a hard time." #microconf
49 14 Watching stranger sign up for and try to use your product, while you watch, will make you disbelieve your skills & view of world #microconf
49 7 I was quite attracted to the notion of being on a beach when I hated my job. Markedly less so when fulfilled. https://t.co/1RuQQ8rxo5
48 13 "It's not the amount of work you do on the product which burns you out, it is the time you spend offline thinking about it." #microconf
48 7 SaaS Churn rates: 2~3% monthly target. 3~5%: need more product/onboarding. 5~10%: no product market fit yet. 10%+: WORLD ON FIRE. #microconf
47 13 Please remind me, again, why people think that $100 a month is too much for something which a company with millions in revenue uses daily.
44 16 "Any consultancy which feels it is just barely making it should double prices." #microconf <- true of MANY consultancies I know
44 8 Major churn wins: fix product onboarding, improve product value, 30/60/90 day onboarding campaigns/customer success. #microconf
42 6 Three pitches for a podcast: teach something new, solve a small problem, or share an unconventional opinion. @kaisdavis #microconf
40 7 Biggest single tip for sales: follow up, follow up, follow up. Trello and email sufficient. #microconf (I like close.io too at scale)
38 2 I'd go so far as to say "Don't make a SaaS app for anything you haven't already at the very least published a book about."
38 21 "It has never in the history of mankind been cheaper to make software. You don't need funding you need a day job at McDonalds. #microconf
36 16 "All find-a-cofounder events are non-technical people talking to non-technical people hoping to find the one technical person in the room."
32 10 "If you're hoping for a blissful existence, running a failed business and running a successful business are both bad options." @patrickc
32 3 "Hacker News is not my ultimate goal for WeddingLovely. There are not a lot of people getting married there. ... I didn't mean to say that."
32 3 "Create a companion course for your product." Additional revenue opportunity; make audience better at their job + build trust. #microconf
31 6 Quarterly meetings to determine roadmap and vision are highest ROI meetings for company. #microconf
31 7 Words cannot express how superior this is, for you and others, than "write no blog posts." Expertise not required! https://t.co/0B8L73jGKL
30 14 "If the company is disorganized and culture is undefined that is the CEO's fault." Put down the keyboard and go to a meeting #microconf
30 6 "The world has gotten better about finding good things without requiring a multi-year or multi-decade ground war conducted via billboard."
30 7 Paraphrase: "You think you can work 10X harder but you cannot find 10X hours in day so you need to scale people and processes." #microconf
29 9 In a business center at a hotel listening to someone getting quoted $5/page for a fax and $2.50 per page thereafter. 74 pages. Didn't blink.
29 8 "Feeling like 'product not ready' made us not get PR or write about it, to detriment of business." Ahh hello self again #microconf
29 3 Marginal SaaS churn wins: pushing annual plans, prioritize support for big accounts, offer people downsell if they request cancellation.
29 0 And that's all for #microconf 2016 (or at least all from me). Thanks much for following along.
29 11 The thing the Internet is disruptively better at is a) distribution costs and b) coordinating the audience so they can find each other.
27 8 "Programmer CEOs often write code and focus on features to the detriment of the business. #microconf <- Ahh, speaks to me.
26 4 Marketing & sales will blame each other if not at product/market fit. "Why u no close our leads?" "Why u give us such bad leads?" #microconf
26 11 "Number one rule: do not argue over instant messenger." #microconf
25 5 "A good benchmark for SaaS companies: 10% month-over-month lead growth AFTER you've got the churn problem fixed." #microconf
25 3 So true. It's amazing -- AMAZING -- the degree to which an LLC jumps you from "peon" to "peer businessman" sometimes https://t.co/Nob7TQVNY0
25 3 "In the early days businesses overweight analytics/metrics & underweight subjective experiences and qualitative data." @patrickc #microconf
25 3 "Every time something cool got built I would look at what they used for payments and if it wasn't Stripe I would ask them why." @patrickc
23 3 "But Patrick, writing a book feels like a lot of work." Oh my friend let me tell you about running SaaS apps.
23 1 "If there is an established norm of forced annual contracts in your category/segment/industry, then use it. Don't do monthly." #microconf
23 7 If you need $10k/mo a month to stay above water, you've got a long tough road ahead of you. If you need $1.5k, you can be there in weeks.
22 1 "We used to have a textbox with a half-completed thoughts on all pages. Anything users typed went to our inbox." @patrickc #microconf
22 7 "I realized that my written voice in business emails didn't match how I talk to friends. So I changed to always use that voice." #microconf
21 8 Entrepreneurs think everyone else cares about our business as much as we do. This is resoundingly untrue.
21 3 Screen sharing onboarding flows will crush your soul, but teach you an awful lot. #microconf
21 2 Two things to get clear onboarding: the title (h1) and the button call to action. These will be most likely things to get read. #microconf
21 7 Make things that you need to do easy, whether that is changing pricing or running experiments. Hard stuff gets put off. #microconf
20 3 If I had $1 for every time someone burned 6 months talking to a potential acquirer and it fell through, I could afford to not buy a company.
19 4 "The first year of your business lets you afford a lot of mistakes. No one sees them or cares." Experiment boldly! #microconf
18 11 People think that the Internet invented weird niche businesses but here is a dead-tree magazine for chicken amateurs https://t.co/3a77PUb35O
18 1 People who listen to my podcasts often tell me they feel like I'm a trusted voice rather than just a guy from the Internet. #microconf
18 2 "We used to pipe all API errors -- and at one point, requests -- to our inboxes. To see what people were doing." @patrickc #microconf
18 3 It would be severely uncouth of me to say "Hand me that USB key and I'll send it to HelloFax at too-cheap-to-meter." He wouldn't care.
18 6 Most people are not wired to make lots of little bets and lose again and again and again to win big. Communicate to help them understand.
17 2 Hawaii is a tropical island paradise but after week in it I start saying "Hey honey how about after Diamondhead maybe I write about churn?"
17 0 I would point out, to anyone who hasn't met him, that Patrick is a geek's geek and still sells better than 99.84% of sales reps in world.
17 7 Patrick and John Collison used to meet people at coffee shops and build their Stripe integrations, live, to do custdev and sales. #microconf
17 1 It is literally "I choose to sell my labor to a firm. This is right and virtuous. You choose to sell something else to a firm. Unclean!"
17 9 You've spent 10k hours in the business and, say, 1/3rd of your waking hours in the last year. Your most engaged user? A couple of hours.
17 3 Negative churn: revenue from each cohort of customers expands faster than lost revenue (cancels/downsells) #microconf <- Beautiful; rare.
17 6 "Acquisition cannot outrun high churn forever." #microconf <-- This is exactly how SaaS companies in the Valley burn through $X0 million.
16 2 "Every channel is different. Each has quirks. Don't spread yourself thin; double down on what works." #microconf
16 4 Tracy just showed her wedding blog's stats at #microconf. FYI: they're a bit higher than mine. "Internet famous" is niche-specific.
16 0 This would be a ridiculously unfun, but highly educational, microsite if anyone wants to make it. https://t.co/R9ytHy8Oh6
16 2 "It is hard to trust others and let go." (Particularly true with regards to things you LIKE and are good at.) #microconf
15 3 Take the work out of replies to cold emails to podcaster: give them 3 ideas for episode topics rather than pushing that on them. #microconf
15 4 "Building enterprise software sucks. Selling it sucks even more." #microconf <-- There exists a suckage premium in it, FWIW.
15 1 "We took a meeting with Peter Thiel and spent an hour telling him why Paypal sucked." @patrickc #microconf (Got done in one hour? ;) )
15 3 "Establish expectations early on in acquisition talks." <- I would say "Expect it to go nowhere; you'll almost always be right." #microconf
14 2 Your best customers buy more, more often, at a higher price. (You have flexibility to target them and only them.) #microconf
14 1 "Cut your expenses to give your business more runway." #microconf <- I probably would be a W-2 employee but for Ogaki having been cheeeeeap.
14 2 (Though contra Peter I would suggest e.g. a low-stress government job or something. Clerk at the water department, etc.)
13 2 The overwhelming majority of our industry is simply enjoying an enormous, sustained expansion of ability to create value and charge for it.
13 1 I'd probably be short terrorism and short climate change, the combination of which will protect America from ever electing me as president.
13 5 I hate no meme so much as "selling shovels", which is a synecdoche for "selling shovels in a gold rush" and universally used as a slur.
13 4 Next up at #microconf : Nathan Barry (@nathanbarry) on building ConvertKit to $180k MRR overnight in five years.
13 1 Typically this means batching reporting of results on a defined cadence (so folks know to expect it) and say "Learned X, Y, Z. Biz impact:"
13 2 "Meetings suck but get over it."
12 3 (Do the math: if you're at 2% churn then you need something like half of your customers to grow spend by 50% to get back to no growth.)
12 1 (Result obtained by simulation in IRB with a very simple model and stats from Wikipedia. I may have to actually make this microsite.)
12 2 You're running a portfolio strategy. Losers: expected. Your best idea being indistinguishable from the intern's off-the-cuff idea: expected.
12 3 And is this industrial age confined to the titans? NO. This time you can download a steam engine for free and lease your factory for $2/mo.
12 2 (I bootstrapped my business with a salary roughly equivalent to a shift manager at McDonald's. Less on an hourly basis.)
11 0 (This is why in the extremely unlikely event you IPO I say "Congrats!" and get $500k back for $5k in not $5,375 for $5k.)
11 3 "33 years old w/ wife." "You were reborn in Lesotho. Your purchasing power parity is $2,900. Your wife is dead. Thanks for playing. Again?"
11 3 Slicehost was the first business I ever loved, for exactly this reason. (I also started on a $20 slice.) https://t.co/V4drUpJcg5
11 1 Why I like Stripe: 25% of Bingo Card Creator's launch budget went to faxing a contract to a payment processor to get able to charge cards.
11 0 "Acquiring https://t.co/CxCaC670NB (from https://t.co/0ubGqlZf7m) caused our business to hockey stick." #microconf
11 3 "We have not yet learned, in 2016, how valuable the cohort of new users from 2011 is." @patrickc #microconf <-- A very nice business model.
11 0 You know I wrote about 50k LOC and two blog posts before Starfighter launched? And maybe two since? Got to fix this.
11 3 This is one of the reasons I write so much. Everybody should -- it lets you keep the thought for forever! Computers at least will remember.
10 2 A lot of their $X00 million accounts started out as random.founder@gmail.com
10 1 As an investor: THIS IS THE BUSINESS WE HAVE CHOSEN. You take your shot at the business and work hard at it. I invested assuming 10% odds.
10 1 PickledOnion's guides were literally the best things on the Internet for learning e.g. light systems administration.
10 2 "It's far more likely that your business will be 'merely OK' than [a breakout success]." #microconf <-- Nothing wrong with this, either.
9 0 I'm pretty happy with life most of the time - all of my businesses pre-Starfighter worked out, in best years, as a first year Google salary.
9 1 Stripe took ~15 months between writing the MVP and getting bizdev done to do banking the right way. @patrickc #microconf
9 6 "You make analytics software? That's selling shovels." What does that even mean when the railroad needs 100,000 of them to build new line.
9 1 AppAmaGooFaceSoft, for their many faults as organizations, have delivered nothing less than a new industrial age.
9 1 "We had made $13k in 18 months of work." Long slow SaaS ramp of death. #microconf
9 1 This counsels making tests cheap/free operationally, having no political barriers to doing them, and not getting attached to winning.
8 0 Got a shoutout from #microconf stage for an HN comment I made back in the day about Tracy & WeddingLovely. https://t.co/10Uoi85kBk
8 0 "I think X is 99% certain to cause problems and I'm willing to spend trillions on it" makes me wish ability to short X. (There are many X.)
8 4 Corporatese is a thing because corps have very, very different payoffs than us regular Joes do. Don't cargo-cult it. Will not cause success.
8 1 I code-switch when writing -- my normal written voice is pretty informal, but I have a professional register available for e.g. negotiating.
8 1 I think perhaps directionally accurate but this is a very complicated topic. Burnout/depression express differently in different people.
8 0 This is the difference between "well qualified to buy a product" and "actively in the market for the product RIGHT NOW."
8 1 I will never, ever hold the business folding against you. No investor worth talking to will either. We knew you weren't selling a T-bill!
8 1 "Once you get 2~3% churn and your churn is in a cohort is negative, your business will literally grow even if you don't work." #microconf
8 0 "It feels like I conned $70,000 off of random strangers on the Internet." Tracy #microconf <- I worried I would get shot for robbing bank.
8 0 "So this money that I just got for this check... I'm going to walk out with it." "Yes sir." "And you're OK with that?" "Of course." "RLY?!"
8 5 One of the great things on being scored on profitability rather than growth is you can say No No No No unless the match is *perfect.*
8 2 "You are going to cry. It will be unbelievably painful."
8 1 "I feel sorry for other businesses -- we get to work with entrepreneurs all the time. Most fun userbase to work with!" @patrickc #microconf
7 2 3 levels of SaaS growth: world-class churn, getting expansion revenue within your cohorts, and accelerating at the right time. #microconf
7 1 A shovel is a quite useful thing. You can plant a field or dig a school's foundation with it. Digging these by hand is objectively worse.
7 1 The context: because their customers continue growing, and continue paying Stripe more money, they can't know if/where asymptote is.
7 1 (You, yes you, could totally write very similar emails. You go to Gmail and make with the typing. That's it.)
7 3 Note that professional communication is entirely different than the bastardized, soulless communications we've been taught to expect.
7 0 Can I observe that people intend to be critical of gold rushes and them being extractive but have instead decided to hate shovels?
7 0 Silicon Valley culture definitely has some weird thoughts about raising money as An Event and then doing empire building because money.
7 2 "Every time I took investment I said LOOK I CAN SPEND MONEY and in hindsight that did not [actually move business forward.]" #microconf
7 1 And I have a fairly decent written voice, too, but the level of connection people have as a result of writing less than voice (and video?)
6 5 Appearing on other people's podcasts lets you borrow audiences and also make favorable impression on people you want to reach #microconf
6 0 Doubled up.
6 0 "Once you have an established business, people will call you on every mistake" <- Respectfully disagree with this. #microconf
6 2 A good poker player: "Why go all-in!? You have to have air." "I literally only beat 1 playable hand. Lucky for me, it is only hand in play."
6 1 "It's so stressful to me that I can't pay [investor] back and that it looks like she won't realize a return on her investment." #microconf
6 2 "It seems like tempting fate to believe the curves and think in a year we need to 10X this but that's the reality in high growth startups."
6 1 Is there purpose and value and sustainable businesses and social utility in creating tools which makes firms better? Yes, yes, yes there is.
5 0 @mariana_farinha Startups for the Rest of Us. Tropical MBA. Empire Flippers. Stacking the Bricks.
5 1 This is common in midmarket marketing automation (Hubspot/Marketo/etc) among others. Not common in e.g. project management.
5 0 And in this tremendous growth in the productive capacity of humanity, some firms sell to other firms rather than to end consumers.
5 1 As a fellow founder, I totally understand the psychology of this and think that that degree of scrupulousness is to your credit.
5 0 Is there a word for selling to producers rather than consumers? B2B, sure, but in general "has existed since before capitalism was a thing."
5 2 Tracy had a co-founder breakup immediately before her YC interview, which is something which is surprisingly common. #microconf
4 1 "Why is it so hard to charge money directly when you can just tell Apple 'it costs $X' and they get 30%?" <-- genesis of Stripe #microconf
4 1 Oh, Tracy Osborn's Twitter is @limedarling and if you're interested in small software businesses she is relevant to your interests.
4 2 Stripe benefits both from growth in number of accounts and growth of businesses, sometimes with enormous lag. @patrickc #microconf
4 2 I actually do like Paypal a lot. Made BCC possible. A little unfortunate they didn't improve in 10 years.
4 1 People who get "selling shovels" deployed against them today are frequently tiny shops and they sell to rich, sophisticated businesses!
4 0 My most unlikely to ever be depicted in a comic book superpower is remembering everything I've ever written. Occasionally helps.
4 1 "In [certain regulated] industries no one will take you seriously unless you're well capitalized and connected, counseling investment."
4 0 In addition to giving you capabilities that you could NOT have otherwise gotten back in 2009, they really, REALLY cared.
4 1 Most people in the small software community don't know Tracy (you should though); I am pretty confident rather few brides know me.
4 0 Next up at #microconf: Tracey Osborne of WeddingLovely. (Shoutout to 500Startups #500strong, where I met her several years ago.)
3 0 Correction from earlier: Tracy Osborn is @limedaring, not the account I pointed at earlier. #microconf
3 2 (P.S. If you think that a YC interview is stressful given relationship, guess what the next 2~10 years of working together will look like.)
3 1 I have a couple of thoughts on this, from the perspective of a bootstrapper and also someone who has ~3 angel investments.
3 0 "Selling shovels" also encodes a distaste for "shovel sellers got rich while the 49ers largely did not", which does not analogize to present
3 2 Next and last at #microconf: @LarsLofgren on growing SaaS businesses.
3 0 Last several quotes from #microconf were @amirkhella from https://t.co/efgetGPn5j -- sorry for lack of ID, was working when he started.
2 0 @TrevMcKendrick Just the domain, for $675k
2 2 A tiny little blip of our industry is a gold rush, where people have entered mania as a result of transitory, extractive opportunities.
2 1 And while I do not want to personalize this disagreement, I will point out "selling shovels" is INEVITABLY deployed by an employee.
2 0 @harisenbon79 I would!
2 0 @dika10sune There are better balls and being the Belle is highly overrated.
2 2 ^^ @patrickc at #microconf and that's my favorite quote of the conference
2 1 Next up: Lessons learned onboarding 50 customers #microconf @r00k
1 0 The story goes that 49ers were largely naive yeomen capitalists of the sort that American lore largely celebrates, vs crass commercializers
1 0 @alanorourke Priorities appear to be "best husband and father I can manage to be", "service to my community", "fun challenges", ...
1 0 @andrewculver @robwalling @hnshah @nathanbarry @brennandunn It's on my presentation slides at BoS 2013. Not sure if I coined it or not.
1 0 Next up at #micrconf: Patrick Collison (@patrickc), about the early days of building Stripe.
1 0 Next up @kaisdavis on podcast tours. #microconf
1 0 @rhapsaadic A proxy for sitting down and doing the work of writing/content marketing plus also a bit of stretching yourself to do hard stuff
1 1 Next up Peter Coppinger from https://t.co/xLm7CB6OwV at #microconf
1 0 @thepodcastdude 12 episodes in 5 years but yep ;)
1 0 @JoshDance Ruby has a console program where you can write code and execute it inline. Useful for prototyping. Often called a REPL from Lisp.
1 0 @DarkTechnomancy Maybe? Should probably write it up.
1 0 @thepodcastdude 3 million words on https://t.co/lwuP4inLDD and in HN comments. So, a bit ;)
1 0 @jeremyvaught Thanks, was great to meet you, too. Drop me a line if I can ever help out.
1 0 @StClairJohn Sorry if this was an excessively literal response to a joke -- I actually spent time thinking about this. (Weird hobbies.)
0 0 @ccmuk Thanks!
0 0 @paulmillr I got to live where I wanted to live and do almost anything I wanted every day even when that was not "Go in to work at Google."
0 0 @alanorourke YMMV but I had a bit of soulsearching on this topic and floundering around last few years. Work in progress!
0 1 RT @grayj_: @patio11 *cough* concierge onboarding *cough*
0 33 RT @robwalling: For a detailed recap of every #MicroConf 2016 talk, courtesy of @kaisdavis, see https://t.co/ZpiHGYPaB1
0 4 RT @patrickc: 5/ Talks aren't fluffy inspiration or burnished success stories. Instead, pricing models, funnel optimization, challenges of…
0 0 @jack_esss The (very occasional) Kalzumeus podcast.
0 23 RT @patrickc: 2/ Takeaways: when being small is okay, there are more interesting niches to build software for than you could ever imagine.
0 0 @JoshDance See this screenshot for the general flavor. https://t.co/avbtfU4w6I
0 0 @rhapsaadic Could be anything between a 50 page ebook and a doorstop. I'd suggest most SaaS folks aim closer to the former.
0 0 @SRhyne I'm going out with friends, but appreciate the offer.
0 0 @tjogin Yeah -- under absolutely no circumstances make video games. (Wait what is my business now DANG IT.)
0 11 RT @patrickc: 1/ I attended MicroConf -- a conference for bootstrapped entrepreneurs -- yesterday. https://t.co/Yg9wEje4Pf
0 0 @JoshDoody I get why people love this game so much.
0 1 RT @grigoriy_kogan: @patio11 Followed this advice thx to you & skipped over "barely making it" stage. Now in "Wow, why don't more ppl do th…
0 0 @3kwa @mitsuhiko Typically professional translators go source to native language but feel free to run it by me.
0 0 @JoshDoody Thanks!
0 0 @danielvf Really appreciate the ping.
0 0 @danielvf Fixed now; queue will clear out within about 10.
0 0 @alanorourke Biggest problem is managing "OK it's a season to sow now for me but it is also a season to be 1 now for daughter. One repeats."
0 0 @grayj_ @limedaring That's brilliant.
0 0 @StClairJohn Otherwise you get something which does lose value if climate change happens but which may lose value even if it doesn't.
0 0 @LisaLamagna Physically in Las Vegas at the moment, but I normally live in Tokyo.
0 4 RT @earthlingworks: Holy smokes, these are great #MicroConf notes. Nice work @kaisdavis https://t.co/AuYGlCHavb
0 173 RT @pmarca: OH: "Privacy is the paramount issue of our time, unless we're talking about stolen documents from movie studios, law firms, or…
0 0 @StClairJohn Has to be harder than that, though -- maybe buy beachfront and sell identical house 10 feet higher. Slippage/friction too high.
0 0 @craz8 If we could only bottle and sell that we wouldn't need to do any recruiting :)
0 0 (Light paraphrase.)
0 0 @thepodcastdude (Like I shipped two mics to my cofounders and am scheduling it. Not just hope.)
0 0 @thepodcastdude Haven't made it a priority. Had a cohost that I had very little availability overlap with. Hoping to do more soonish.
0 25 RT @patrickc: 3/ The lack of VC money makes self-deception much harder. MicroConfers are strikingly rigorous, honest, and actively truth-se…
Raw
tweets.json
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