Funny little, co-routines abusing chat server based on raw tcp sockets, made for @wtr7.

wtr_chat.js

["net", "fs", "querystring", "child_process", "co"].forEach(function (v) {
	global[v] = require(v)
});

var users = {/*
	nick: socket
*/};

var operators = {
	"apx": "123456789",
	"wtr": "yoloswag"
};

var methods = {
	whoami: function (cb) {
		cb("You are " + this.nick);
	},
	version: function (cb) {
		cb("This server is running: " + process.version);
	},
	names: function (cb) {
		var ulist = Object.keys(users);

		cb("There " + (ulist.length !== 1 ? "are" : "is") +" currently " + ulist.length + " user" + (ulist.length !== 1 ? "s" : "") + ": " + ulist.join(", "));
	},
	kick: function (user, cb) {
		if ( users[user] ) {
			users[user].end("\r\033[31m>> \033[33m" + this.nick + "\033[31m kicked you from the server.\033[0m\n");
			delete users[user];

			cb("OK. Kicked " + user + " from the server.");

			var self = this;

			Object.keys(users).forEach(function (ruser) {
				ruser !== self.nick
					&& users[ruser].write("\r\033[31m>> " + self.nick + " kicked \033[33m" + user + "\033[31m from the server.\033[0m\n");
			});
		} else
			cb("There's no user called " + user);
	}
};

var cowrap = function (method, args, nick) {
	return function (cb) {
		if ( methods[method] ) {
			if ( typeof args !== "object" )
				args = [args];

			args.push(function (retval) {
				cb (false, retval);
			})

			methods[method].apply({
				nick: nick
			}, args);
		} else {
			cb (true, void 0);
			//  ^^^^  ------
			//  err   result
		}
	}
}

var sock = net.createServer(function (s) {
	var nick = void 0;

	var _handler = co(function *(chunk) {
		if ( !nick ) {
			var rchunk = chunk.toString().replace(/\r\n/, "").split(" ");

			if ((rchunk.length !== 2 && rchunk.length !== 3) || rchunk[0] !== ".nick") {
				return s.write("\033[0m>> \033[31mPlease identify yourself! Usage: .nick <nick>\033[0m\n");
			} else {
				if ( rchunk[1] in users ) {
					return s.write("\033[0m>> \033[31mNick is already used! Use a different one.\033[0m\n");
				} else {
					if ( rchunk[1] in operators )
						if ( rchunk[2] )
							if ( operators[rchunk[1]] === rchunk[2] );
								// ok
							else
								return s.end("\033[0m>> \033[31mBad authentication! Die in hell\033[0m\n");
						else
							return s.write("\033[0m>> \033[31mOperators have to authenticate.\033[0m\n");

					nick = rchunk[1];
					users[rchunk[1]] = s;

					var ulist = Object.keys(users).filter(function (user) {
						return user !== nick
					});

					var rmotd; // message of the day

					if ( !ulist.length )
						rmotd = "You're alone on the server, currently.\n";
					else {
						rmotd = "These users are currently connected: " + ulist.join(", ") + "\n";

						ulist.forEach(function (user) {
							users[user].write("\r\033[31m>> \033[33m" + (nick in operators ? "@" : "") + nick + "\033[31m joined\033[0m\n");
							users[user].write("\033[0m>> \033[33m" + user + "\033[0m: ");
						});
					}

					s.write("\033[0m>> \033[31mHello, " + rchunk[1] + "! " + rmotd + "\033[0m");
					s.write("\033[0m>> \033[33m" + nick + "\033[0m: ");
				}
			}
		} else {
			var rchunk = chunk.toString().replace(/\r\n/, "").split(" ");
				
			if ( rchunk[0][0] === "." ) {
				var mthd = rchunk[0].substr(1);

				if ( mthd in methods ) {
					var resp = yield cowrap ( mthd, rchunk.slice(1, rchunk.length), nick )

					return s.write("\033[0m>> \033[31m" + resp + "\n");
				} else {
					return s.write("\033[0m>> \033[31mUnknown command: " + mthd + "\n");
				}
			}

			var ulist = Object.keys(users).filter(function (user) {
				return user !== nick
			});

			var msg = chunk.toString().replace(/\r\n/, " ");

			ulist.forEach(function (user) {
				users[user].write("\r\033[0m>> \033[33m" + nick + "\033[0m: \033[36m" + msg + "\n");
				users[user].write("\033[0m>> \033[33m" + user + "\033[0m: ");
			});

			s.write("\033[0m>> \033[33m" + nick + "\033[0m: ");
		}
	});

	s.on("data", _handler);
})

sock.listen(1239);