Once upon a time, there was a squid named Jeffery. The squid liked cheeseburgers, but not pizza. His best friend was a pufferfish named Jimmy John Jones. Jimmy John Jones liked to eat pizza, but he couldn’t eat cheeseburgers. So, Jimmy John Jones and Jeffery made a bet. Jimmy John Jones bet that he could eat a cheeseburger. Jeffery bet that he could not. So, Jimmy John Jones went to get a cheeseburger. When he got back, he was sick, and he couldn’t eat the cheeseburger. Jeffery won the bet.”
“Wait,” I said, “how can a pufferfish eat a cheeseburger?”
“No,” she said, and she made a face.
“No?”
“No. Jimmy John Jones did not eat a cheeseburger. Jimmy John Jones wanted to eat a cheeseburger.”
“But he’s a pufferfish.”
“No, he’s not.”
“But he’s a pufferfish.”
“But he’s not.”
“But he’s a pufferfish.”
I sighed. “What’s a pufferfish?”
She looked at me as if I’d asked her something really stupid. “A pufferfish is a fish.”
“Oh.”
“Yes.” She nodded. “Jimmy John Jones is a pufferfish. But he did not eat a cheeseburger. He wanted to eat a cheeseburger.”
“So he went to get a cheeseburger, but he was sick when he got back?”
“Yes.”
“That’s what you said.”
“So Jimmy John Jones did not eat a cheeseburger.” She said it again. She said it like she wanted to make sure I understood.
“Oh. Okay.”
“And then Jeffery won the bet.”
“Okay.”
“So then Jimmy John Jones was sad.”
“Oh.”
“And then Jeffery went to get Jimmy John Jones another cheeseburger.”
“Okay.”
“And then Jimmy John Jones was happy.”
“Oh.”
“So, then, the end.”
“What happened to the cheeseburger Jimmy John Jones didn’t eat?”
“I put it in the refrigerator.”
“Oh.”
“And then Jeffery went to get some ice cream.”
“Oh.”
“And then Jimmy John Jones ate the ice cream.”
“Okay.”
“And then they were both happy.”
“Okay.”
“And then the end.”
“The end.”
“Yes.”
“Okay.”
She smiled and I smiled.
“What’s a pufferfish?” she asked.
“A pufferfish is a fish.”
“Oh.”