Tubthumping.ps1

$n="`n"
$l = @{
    C=@({"I get knocked down,$((&$l.A)[0])ut I get up again$((&$l.A)[1])"},{"You are never gonna keep me down"})
    V={"$(((("Whiskey","Vodka"),("Lager","Cider") | %{($_ | %{"He drinks a $_ drink"}) -join ", "}),(("good","best") | %{"He sings the songs that remind him of the $_ times"}) | %{$_}) -join $n)`n($(switch ($_) {2 {"Oh Danny Boy, Danny Boy, Danny Boy"}; 4 {"Don't cry for me, next door neighbor"}}))"}
    A={if($lp -le 5){@(" b","")}else{@(" (we'll be singing)`nB","$(if($lp -gt 9){" (pissing the night away)"})")}}
}

$out = 1..20 | %{
    $lp = $_
    if ($_ -le 5){
        if ($_ % 2 -eq 0){
            & $l.V
        }
        else {
            (1..4 | %{
                ($l.C|%{&$_})
            }) -join "`n"
        }
    } else {
        ((($l.C|%{&$_}) -join "`n"),($(switch([int]($_ % 2 -eq 0)){0{"ooh)"};1{"when we're winning)"}}))) -join " ("
    }
}

write-host ($out -join "`n`n")