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Markov Science!
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<?php | |
/* | |
PHP Markov Chain text generator 1.0 | |
Copyright (c) 2008-2010, Hay Kranen <http://www.haykranen.nl/projects/markov/> | |
Fork on Github: < http://github.com/hay/markov > | |
License (MIT / X11 license) | |
Permission is hereby granted, free of charge, to any person | |
obtaining a copy of this software and associated documentation | |
files (the "Software"), to deal in the Software without | |
restriction, including without limitation the rights to use, | |
copy, modify, merge, publish, distribute, sublicense, and/or sell | |
copies of the Software, and to permit persons to whom the | |
Software is furnished to do so, subject to the following | |
conditions: | |
The above copyright notice and this permission notice shall be | |
included in all copies or substantial portions of the Software. | |
THE SOFTWARE IS PROVIDED "AS IS", WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, | |
EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE WARRANTIES | |
OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND | |
NONINFRINGEMENT. IN NO EVENT SHALL THE AUTHORS OR COPYRIGHT | |
HOLDERS BE LIABLE FOR ANY CLAIM, DAMAGES OR OTHER LIABILITY, | |
WHETHER IN AN ACTION OF CONTRACT, TORT OR OTHERWISE, ARISING | |
FROM, OUT OF OR IN CONNECTION WITH THE SOFTWARE OR THE USE OR | |
OTHER DEALINGS IN THE SOFTWARE. | |
*/ | |
function generate_markov_table($text, $look_forward) { | |
$table = array(); | |
// now walk through the text and make the index table | |
for ($i = 0; $i < strlen($text); $i++) { | |
$char = substr($text, $i, $look_forward); | |
if (!isset($table[$char])) $table[$char] = array(); | |
} | |
// walk the array again and count the numbers | |
for ($i = 0; $i < (strlen($text) - $look_forward); $i++) { | |
$char_index = substr($text, $i, $look_forward); | |
$char_count = substr($text, $i+$look_forward, $look_forward); | |
if (isset($table[$char_index][$char_count])) { | |
$table[$char_index][$char_count]++; | |
} else { | |
$table[$char_index][$char_count] = 1; | |
} | |
} | |
return $table; | |
} | |
function generate_markov_text($length, $table, $look_forward) { | |
// get first character | |
$char = array_rand($table); | |
$o = $char; | |
for ($i = 0; $i < ($length / $look_forward); $i++) { | |
$newchar = return_weighted_char($table[$char]); | |
if ($newchar) { | |
$char = $newchar; | |
$o .= $newchar; | |
} else { | |
$char = array_rand($table); | |
} | |
} | |
return $o; | |
} | |
function return_weighted_char($array) { | |
if (!$array) return false; | |
$total = array_sum($array); | |
$rand = mt_rand(1, $total); | |
foreach ($array as $item => $weight) { | |
if ($rand <= $weight) return $item; | |
$rand -= $weight; | |
} | |
} | |
?> |
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<?php | |
require 'markov.php'; | |
$order = 4; | |
$length = 250; | |
$text = file_get_contents("science.txt"); | |
$markov_table = generate_markov_table($text, $order); | |
$markov = generate_markov_text($length, $markov_table, $order); | |
$lines = explode("\n", $markov); | |
$line = $lines[1]; | |
if(strlen($line) > 100){ | |
$line = substr($line, 0, 100); | |
$words = explode(" ", $line); | |
array_pop($words); | |
$line = implode(" ", $words); | |
} | |
?> | |
<html> | |
<head> | |
<title> TOTALLY LEGITIMATE SCIENCE </title> | |
</head> | |
<body background="http://totally-legitimate.science/img/bg.jpg"> | |
<h1 style="color:white;font-size:150px;text-align:center;height:150px;line-height:200px;font-family:Helvetica Neue,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif"><i> | |
<?= $line ?> | |
</i></h1> | |
</body> | |
</html> |
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There are 206 bones in the adult human body and there are 300 in children as they grow some of the bones fuse together | |
Fleas can jump 130 times higher than their own height | |
The most dangerous animal in the world is the common housefly | |
Because of their habits of visiting animal waste, they transmit more diseases than any other animal | |
Snakes are true carnivorous because they eat nothing but other animals | |
They do not eat any type of plant material | |
The world's largest amphibian is the giant salamander | |
It can grow up to 5 feet in length | |
The smallest bone in the human body is the stapes or stirrup bone located in the middle ear. It is approximately .11 inches long | |
The longest cells in the human body are the motor neurons | |
They can be up to 4.5 feet long and run from the lower spinal cord to the big toe | |
There are no poisonous snakes in Maine | |
The blue whale can produce sounds up to 188 decibels | |
This is the loudest sound produced by a living animal and has been detected as far away as 530 miles | |
The largest man made lake in the US is Lake Mead, created by Hoover Dam | |
The poison arrow frogs of South and Central America are the most poisonous animals in the world | |
A new born blue whale measures 20 to 26 feet long and weighs up to 6,614 pounds | |
The first coast to coast telephone line was established in 1914 | |
The Virginia opossum has a gestation period of only 12 days | |
The Stegosaurus dinosaur measured up to 30 feet long but had a brain the size of a walnut | |
The largest meteorite crater in the world is in Winslow, Arizona | |
It is 4,150 feet across and 150 feet deep | |
The human eye blinks an average of 4,200,000 times a year | |
Skylab, the first American space station, fell to the earth in thousands of pieces in 1979 | |
It takes approximately 12 hours for food to entirely digest | |
Human jaw muscles can generate a force of 200 pounds on the molars | |
The Skylab astronauts grew 2 inches due to spinal lengthening and straightening as a result of zero gravity | |
An inch of rain water is equivalent to 15 inches of dry, powdery snow | |
Tremendous erosion at the base of Niagara Falls undermines the shale cliffs and as a result the falls have receded approximately 7 miles over the last 10,000 years | |
40 to 50 percent of body heat can be lost through the head as a result of its extensive circulatory network | |
A large swarm of desert locusts can consume 20,000 tons of vegetation a day | |
The largest telescope in the world is currently being constructed in northern Chile | |
The telescope will utilize 4 mirrors which will gather as much light as a single 52 foot mirror | |
The Hubble Space Telescope weighs 12 tons and cost $2.1 billion to originally build | |
The longest living cells in the body are brain cells which can live an entire lifetime | |
The largest flying animal was the pterosaur which lived 70 million years ago | |
This reptile had a wing span of 37 feet and weighed 200 pounds | |
The Atlantic Giant Squid's eye can be as large as 16 inches wide | |
Armadillos, opossums, and sloth's spend about 80% of their lives sleeping | |
The starfish species, Porcellanaster ivanovi, has been found to live in water as deep as 24,881 feet | |
The tentacles of the giant Arctic jellyfish can reach 120 feet in length | |
The greatest tide change on earth occurs in the Bay of Fundy | |
The difference between low tide and high tide can be as great as 55 feet | |
The highest temperature produced in a laboratory was 920,000,000 F at the Tokamak Fusion Test Reactor in Princeton, New Jersey | |
The most powerful laser in the world, the Nova laser at Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory, CA, USA, generates a pulse of energy equal to 100,000,000,000,000 watts of power for .000000001 second to a target the size of a grain of sand | |
The fastest computer in the world is the CRAY Y-MP C90 supercomputer | |
It has two gigabytes of central memory and 16 parallel central processor units | |
The heaviest human brain ever recorded weighed 5 pounds | |
The deepest part of the ocean is 35,813 feet deep and occurs in the Mariana Trench in the Pacific Ocean | |
At that depth the pressure is 18,000 pounds per square inch | |
The largest cave in the world, the Sarawak Chamber in Malaysia, is 2,300 feet long, 980 feet wide, and more than 230 feet high | |
The hottest planet in the solar system is Venus, with an estimated surface temperature of 864 degrees | |
The ears of a cricket are located on the front legs, just below the knee | |
The first electronic digital computer was developed in 1946 and contained over 18,000 vacuum tubes | |
The leg muscles of a locust are about 1000 times more powerful than an equal weight of human muscle | |
The cosmos contains approximately 50,000,000,000 galaxies | |
There are between 100,000,000,000 and 1,000,000,000,000 stars in a normal galaxy | |
Sound travels about 4 times faster in water than in air | |
Scientists have discovered that copper pollution of the atmosphere occurred about 2500 years ago | |
The pollution was attributed to the Romans who used copper for military purposes and to produce coins | |
Hydrofluoric acid will dissolve glass | |
In a full grown rye plant, the total length of roots may reach 380 miles | |
In a full grown rye plant, the total length of fine root hairs may reach 6600 miles | |
A large sunspot can last for about a week | |
If you could throw a snowball fast enough, it would totally vaporize when it hit a brick wall | |
Boron nitride is the second hardest substance known to man | |
The female Tarantula Hawk wasp paralyzes a large spider with her sting | |
She then lays her eggs on the motionless body so that her developing young have a fresh supply of spider meat to feed on | |
The seeds of an Indian Lotus tree remain viable for 300 to 400 years | |
The only letter not appearing on the Periodic Table is the letter "J" | |
Velcro was invented by a Swiss guy who was inspired by the way burrs attached to clothing | |
October 10 is National Metric Day | |
If you stretch a standard Slinky out flat it measures 87 feet long | |
The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket | |
Super Glue was invented by accident | |
No matter its size or thickness, no piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times | |
A car uses half its fuel to overcome wind resistance | |
Knowledge is growing so fast that ninety per cent of what we will know in fifty years time, will be discovered in those fifty years | |
According to an old English system of time units, a moment is one and a half minutes | |
The typewriter was invented in 1829, and the automatic dishwasher in 1889 | |
The wristwatch was invented in 1904 by Louis Cartier | |
When glass breaks, the cracks move at speeds of up to 3,000 miles per hour | |
By raising your legs slowly and laying on your back, you can't sink in quicksand | |
Ten minutes of one hurricane contains enough energy to match the nuclear stockpiles of the world | |
Most gemstones contain several elements | |
Diamonds are the hardest substance known to man | |
Which of the 50 states has never had an earthquake? North Dakota | |
When hydrogen burns in the air, water is formed | |
Sterling silver contains 7.5% copper | |
Cars were first made with ignition keys in 1949 | |
JB Dunlop was first to put air into tires | |
Alexander Graham Bell, who invented the telephone, also set a world water speed record of over seventy miles an hour at the age of seventy two | |
It is energy efficient to turn off a fluorescent light only if it will not be used again within an hour or more | |
This is because of the high voltage needed to turn it on, and the shortened life this high voltage causes | |
The Earth's equatorial circumference is greater than its polar circumference | |
Lake Baikal is the deepest lake in the world | |
Due to gravitational effects, you weigh slightly less when the moon is directly overhead | |
The Earth's average velocity orbiting the sun is 107,220 km per hour | |
There is a high and low tide because of our moon and the Sun | |
The United States consumes 25% of all the world's energy | |
Flying from London to New York by Concord, due to the time zones crossed, you can arrive 2 hours before you leave | |
There is enough fuel in a full tank of a Jumbo Jet to drive an average car four times around the world | |
The surface speed record on the moon is 10.56 miles per hour | |
If you could drive to the sun at 55 miles per hour it would take about 193 years | |
The moon is one million times drier than the Gobi Desert | |
Just twenty seconds worth of fuel remained when the Apollo 11 lunar module landed on the moon | |
A Boeing 707 uses four thousand gallons of fuel in its takeoff climb | |
The planet Saturn has a density lower than water | |
Since 1959, more than 6,000 pieces of space junk have fallen out of orbit | |
It takes 70% less energy to produce a ton of paper from recycled paper than from trees | |
Every year in the US, 625 people are struck by lightning | |
Hawaii is moving toward Japan 4 inches every year | |
The rocket engine has to supply its own oxygen so it can burn its fuel in outer space | |
The North Atlantic gets 1 inch wider every year | |
Oxygen is the most abundant element in the Earth's crust, waters, and atmosphere | |
A stroke of lightning discharges from 10 to 100 million volts & 30,000 amperes of electricity | |
Hydrogen is the most abundant element in the Universe | |
The average distance between the Earth & the Moon is 238,857 miles | |
The moon is 27% the size of the Earth | |
The center of the Sun is about 27 million degrees Fahrenheit | |
Sunlight takes about 8 minutes & 20 seconds to reach the Earth at 186,282 miles per second | |
The highest temperature on Earth was 136°F in Libya in 1922 | |
The lowest temperature on Earth was -128.6°F in Antarctica in 1983 | |
Sunlight can penetrate clean ocean water to a depth of 240 feet | |
The average ocean floor is 12,000 feet | |
The temperature can be determined by counting the number of cricket chirps in fourteen seconds and adding 40 | |
House flies have a lifespan of two weeks | |
Chimps are the only animals that can recognize themselves in a mirror | |
Starfish don't have brains | |
The average person falls asleep in seven minutes | |
Shrimp hearts are in their heads | |
Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming one tenth of a calorie | |
The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds | |
Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards | |
Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, while dogs only have about ten | |
Porcupines float in water | |
An ostrich's eye is bigger that its brain | |
An iguana can stay under water for 28 minutes | |
The common goldfish is the only animal that can see both infrared and ultraviolet light | |
It is impossible to sneeze with your eyes open | |
The pupil of an octopus eye is rectangular | |
Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing | |
The leg bones of a bat are so thin that no bat can walk | |
Ants cannot chew their food, they move their jaws sideways, like scissors, to extract the juices from the food | |
Hummingbirds are the only animals able to fly backwards | |
A cat has 32 muscles in each ear | |
Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur | |
Armadillos get an average of 18.5 hours of sleep per day | |
Armadillos can walk underwater | |
There are more beetles than any other kind of creature in the world | |
Certain frogs that can survive the experience of being frozen | |
Only humans sleep on their backs | |
The human brain is 80% water | |
As an adult, you have more than 20 square feet of skin on your body | |
15 million blood cells are produced and destroyed in the human body every second | |
Every minute, 40,000 dead skin cells fall from your body | |
The brain uses more than 25% of the oxygen used by the human body | |
If your mouth was completely dry, you would not be able to distinguish the taste of anything | |
There are more living organisms on the skin of a single human being than there are human beings on the surface of the earth | |
Muscles are made up of bundles from about 5 in the eyelid to about 200 in the buttock muscle | |
Muscles in the human body make up about half of the body weight | |
The human body has enough fat to produce 7 bars of soap | |
The human head is a quarter of our total length at birth, but only an eighth of our total length by the time we reach adulthood | |
Most people blink about 17,000 times a day | |
Moths have no stomach | |
Hummingbirds can't walk | |
Sea otters have 2 coats of fur | |
A starfish can turn its stomach inside out | |
A zebra is white with black stripes | |
The animal with the largest brain in relation to its body is the ant | |
The largest eggs in the world are laid by a shark | |
A crocodile's tongue is attached to the roof of its mouth | |
Crocodiles swallow stones to help them dive deeper | |
Giraffes are unable to cough | |
Sharks are immune to cancer | |
Despite the hump, a camel's spine is straight | |
A giraffe's neck contains the same number of vertebrae as a human | |
The heart of giraffe is two feet long, and can weigh as much as twenty four pounds | |
On average, Elephants sleep for about 2 hours per day | |
Lobsters have blue blood | |
Shark teeth are literally as hard as steel | |
A mosquito has 47 teeth | |
Oxygen, carbon, hydrogen and nitrogen make up 90% of the human body | |
Seventy percent of the dust in your home consists of shed human skin | |
Fish are the only vertebrates that outnumber birds | |
A cockroach can live for several weeks without its head | |
The average human produces a quart of saliva a day | |
Elephants have been known to remain standing after they die | |
The embryos of tiger sharks fight each other while in their mother's womb, the survivor being the baby shark that is born | |
Ants do not sleep | |
Nearly a third of all bottled drinking water purchased in the US is contaminated with bacteria | |
Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over 1 million descendents | |
An Astronaut can be up to 2 inches taller returning from space | |
The cartilage disks in the spine expand in the absence of gravity | |
The oldest known fossil is of a single celled organism found in 3.2 billion year old stones in South Africa | |
The oldest multicellular fossils date from about 700 million years ago | |
The earliest cockroach fossils are about 280 million years old | |
Healthy nails grow about 2 cm each year | |
Fingernails grow four times as fast as toenails | |
The eye can see at 20 feet what another eye sees at 15 feet | |
The average person has 100,000 hairs on their head | |
Each hair grows about 5 inches every year | |
There are 60,000 miles in blood vessels in every human |
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