A few weeks ago I decided I wanted to hire a personal trainer. The interaction did not go quite how I expected.
Me: So, I'm looking to get buff. I mean big changes. I want to turn heads when I take my shirt off. I've got a trip coming up in three months, so I need to start training as soon as possible.
Trainer: I can definitely help you with that!
Me: Great! And just so we're on the same page, and don't want to mess with any of that free-weight crap. I really hate those. And the only days I have available for exercise are Fridays. I can just put in an extra long workout, though.
Trainer: Well, if you want to get buff in three months, free weights will definitely be a part of your training. In fact, that's most of what we do here. And working out once a week isn't going to get you anywhere near your goal, not to mention the danger of trying to push yourself too hard in one workout.
Me: Hmmm, that's disappointing. I understand my conditions are not ideal, but I'm happy to pay you if you can work with me.
Trainer: I'd love to work with you, but I'd be doing you a disservice if I took your money and worked within those parameters. That's just not how you get in shape.
Me: Okay, fine. I can handle the free weights, and I can probably find a couple more days a week to come in.
Trainer: Excellent! Now, with your goals you know you'll need to change your diet as well, right?
Me: Hey now, I'm just hiring you for training. I'm a busy guy, and I eat out a lot. Changing my diet isn't what I came in for.
Trainer: Well, that's your call, but be prepared not to hit your goals. You can't just change one thing and expect your body to be in great shape.
Me: Sigh... Okay, I'll see what I can do. I can tell you have my best interests in mind, and I'm staring to feel like we can really make this happen. When can we start?
Okay, so there never really was a trainer. This is just a metaphor that came to my mind on my flight back from RubyConf. If you haven't figured it out yet, the trainer in this story is a software consultancy and I'm a prospective client.
The point is that we have to be willing to tell our clients things they don't want to hear. We are the software experts, and it is our duty to encourage or even enforce development processes and tools that are most effective. If we don't do this, we do our clients a disservice, and everybody loses.
Sure, this will scare some clients away. Not everyone is open to change. But those who are will respect your honesty and will understand that you have their best interests in mind. You get to use tools and processes that work, and your client can achieve their goals. Everybody wins.