Cargo.toml

[package]
name = "jkcclemens"
version = "0.1.0"

[[bin]]
name = "jkcclemens"
path = "main.rs"

[dependencies]
rand = "0.4"

main.rs

extern crate rand;

use rand::{Rng, thread_rng};
use std::env::args;
use std::process::Command;

const LMAO: &[&str] = &[
  "topkek",
  "lmao",
  "ffs",
  "dammit",
  "kek",
  "lel"
];

fn main() {
  let args: Vec<String> = args().skip(1).collect();
  if args.is_empty() {
    println!("{}", thread_rng().choose(LMAO).unwrap());
    return;
  }
  let output = Command::new(&args[0]).args(&args[1..]).output().unwrap();
  for part in String::from_utf8_lossy(&output.stdout).split(' ') {
    print!("{}", part);
    if thread_rng().gen_weighted_bool(3) {
      print!(" {}", thread_rng().choose(LMAO).unwrap());
    }
    print!(" ");
  }
  println!();
}