bingo

#!/usr/bin/env php
<?php

function shuffleBalls(): array
{
    $balls = range(1, 90);
    shuffle($balls);
    return $balls;
}

function drawBall(array $balls): array
{
    if (empty($balls)) {
        return [];
    }
    return [array_shift($balls), $balls];
}

function displayBall($ball, $balls): void
{
    $display = [];
    if (count($balls) < 89) {
        $display[] = ',';
    }

    $display[] = "$ball";
    if (count($balls) && count($balls) % 5 == 0) {
        $display[] = "(".count($balls)." left)";
    }

    fwrite(STDERR, join(" ", $display));
}

function chance($percent)
{
    return rand(0,99) < $percent;
}

function createAnnouncement($ball)
{
    $statements = [
        1 => "kelly's eye",
        11 => "legs eleven",
        22 => "two little ducks",
        33 => "all the threes",
        44 => "droopy drawers",
        50 => "it's a bulls eye!",
        60 => "grandma's getting frisky",
        69 => "meal for two",
        83 => "stop farting!",
        88 => "two fat ladies",
        90 => "top of the shop"
    ];

    $say = [];
    switch($ball) {
    case isset($statements[$ball]) && chance(50):
        $say[] = $statements[$ball];
        break;
    case strlen((string) $ball) == 1:
        $say[] = "on it's own";
        break;
    default:
        [$num1, $num2] = str_split((string) $ball);
        $say[] = "$num1 and $num2";
        break;
    }


    $say[] = chance(25) ? "number $ball" : $ball;
    return join(", ", $say);
}

function announce($ball, $balls)
{
    $announce = createAnnouncement($ball);
    if(getenv("BINGO_DISPLAY")) {
        printf("%s\n", $announce);
    } else {
        displayBall($ball, $balls);
        shell_exec(join(" ", ["say", escapeshellarg($announce)]));
        sleep(1);
    }
}

function play()
{
    $balls = shuffleBalls();
    while(@[$ball, $balls] = drawBall($balls)) {
        announce($ball, $balls);
    }
}

play();