Fix expensive comment queries

comments.php

<?php
if ( defined( 'WPCOM_IS_VIP_ENV' ) && true === WPCOM_IS_VIP_ENV ) {
	wpcom_vip_load_plugin( 'disable-comments-query' );

	// Kill wp_count_comments lookups because they happen too frequently and are super slow.
	if ( is_admin() ) {
		add_filter( 'wp_count_comments', function( $counts, $post_id ) {
			if ( $post_id )
				return $counts;

			return (object) array(
				'approved'        => 0,
				'spam'            => 0,
				'trash'           => 0,
				'total_comments'  => 0,
				'moderated'       => 0,
				'post-trashed'    => 0,
			);
		}, 10, 2 );
	}
}