Essay for Ada

ada_essay.md

1. Programming to me is interesting because it breaks down the components of a structure (computing), or rather it builds that structure. So, for example in literature, I work back words from the narrative and find the logic and abstract meaning whether it be personal or for academic analytical purposes, but in code it is so interesting because it is a created language based off a set of libraries and logic drawn from our real structures (ie. Math, Language, Philosophy) that anyone can create (unlike real language because our structure is malleable but pretty firm, like if I made up a language instead of English people would not understand and probably think that I have a defect) and can further change the rules what have you and create something not only externally tangible (well virtual, sort-of tangible) but interactive and malleable, but also at the same time static. The product of programming language to me is fascinating and infinitely interesting just based on the fact that through language and natural guides from our understanding of reality we have created a junk website that is trying to sell you some product.
2. My desire is to be in a position that is realistic to my abilities, and how I am comfortable working. Sales is a nightmare and developing full time seems a bit out of reach, but I enjoy the thought of perusing a tech career in DevOps or Automation Testing. I am in PM, Database Administration, etc. Basically, I am the person that makes sure that everything doesn’t fall to pieces. I enjoy this type of work, but I want to be challenged more. I want to be writing Selenium Scripts to check and check again and again for errors, I want to have access to the backend of programs and work backwards from code to debug issues. I want to have a say in the High-LevelDev of programs. I want to be paid more and not be having to prove my technical capabilities everyday (being a woman and all). I don’t want anyone ever again to say to me that “I won’t understand it is too technical” or to make me responsible for Admin Work as well as DB Administration because I couldn’t possibly have a job that is just DB Administration! I want to learn from my job every day.
3. I made the mistake of believing in the American Dream of abstract satisfaction of going to college and its solution for the anxieties of life--big mistake! Leading up to college, I had a pretty average home life until halfway through high school when everything fell to pieces. I was avoidant and anxious---feelings of wanderlust and turmoil college would heal guided my days. College was a big wake up call. Socially and academically, I crashed and burned (I have a very good community now). It was like in that scene in finding Nemo when the fish leave the tank, roll across the road and land in the ocean concealed in a bag, and they are like, “Now what?” I didn’t know what I had only planned to this point. I had no structure, no support, and no idea who I was. I learned so much from this, that I am forever grateful because the lessons I learned has not only provided the framework of which I rebuilt myself, but have prepared me for life. Sometimes, people never get this experience and live in ignorance, but I would not want to be ignorant. I feel more enriched from my experience.
4. I have taught myself music, on various instruments over the span of ten years. It began because I would get melodies stuck in my head and the only way move on was to play it. I taught myself by ear from an old keyboard my uncle gave me, and would learn from my friends and family, and eventually I started taking lessons. Throughout High school I was vigorous with my schedule, I did not have a lunch after my Freshman year instead I took either Music Theory, Choir, or whatever was available. I would often skip Gym to go to the choir room to practice piano. I had special arrangements with the directors of the auditorium and they would let me practice after school. I would take naps and eat quick meals in the band room between rehearsals. I’d often practice until 2am in the basement with a shirt tucked into the bell of my saxophone to not wake up my family. I used books, listened obsessively to Jazz/Classical Music, and watched YouTube videos to build my skills. It was my life, my community, my passion.