FuzzyDate.php

<?php
/**
 * User: @davidkryzaniak
 * Date: 6/10/14
 * Time: 15:10 
 */

class FuzzyDate{

    private $SECOND = 1;
    private $MINUTE = 60;
    private $HOUR = 3600;
    private $DAY = 86400;
    private $MONTH = 259000;
    private $YEAR = 946080000;

    /**
     * Make a fuzzy date message.
     * 
     * @param int number of seconds between now and the event (likely a post or something)
     * @return string like "6 minutes ago" or "last year"
     */
    public function __construct($timeSince)
    {
        if ($timeSince <= 0){return "Just now";}
        if ($timeSince < 1 * $this->MINUTE){return $timeSince == $this->SECOND ? "One second ago" : $timeSince . " seconds ago";}
        if ($timeSince < 2 * $this->MINUTE){return "A minute ago";}
        if ($timeSince < 45 * $this->MINUTE){return floor($timeSince/$this->MINUTE) . " minutes ago";}
        if ($timeSince < 90 * $this->MINUTE){return "An hour ago";}
        if ($timeSince < 24 * $this->HOUR){return floor($timeSince/$this->HOUR) . " hours ago";}
        if ($timeSince < 48 * $this->HOUR){return "Yesterday";}
        if ($timeSince < 30 * $this->DAY){return floor($timeSince/$this->DAY) . " days ago";}
        if ($timeSince < 12 * $this->MONTH){
            return $timeSince/$this->MONTH <= 1 ? "Last month" : floor($timeSince/$this->MONTH) . " months ago";
        }else{
            return $timeSince/$this->YEAR <= 1 ? "Last year" : floor($timeSince/$this->YEAR) . " years ago";
        }
    }


}