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Created June 13, 2011 23:30
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How to NEVER use lambdas.
##########################################################
# How to NEVER use Lambdas. An inneficient and yet educa-#
# tonal guide to the proper misuse of the lambda constru-#
# ct in Python 2.x. [DO NOT USE ANY OF THIS EVER] #
# by: e000 (13/6/11) #
##########################################################
## Part 1. Basic LAMBDA Introduction ##
# Well, it's worth diving straight into what lambdas are.
# Lambdas are pretty much anonymous "one line" functions
# that are able to be constructed at runtime. Typical usage
# would be to plug it into `filter()` or `map()`, but that's
# boring. Let's start with the most basic of basic examples.
def pow(x, power):
return x**power
# Bam, a function that raises `x` to the `power` power.
# Now let's do that in a one lined lambda.
# >>> pow(1, 3)
# 1
# >>> pow(2, 3)
# 8
pow = lambda x, power: x**power
# Fine, that's all cool. Basic and easy or what not.
## Part 2: Scoping within Lambdas -or- A really bad way ##
## to define variables within lambdas. ##
# Let's try something a bit more complicated. A random
# string or password generator? Sure.
import random, string
characters = string.digits + string.letters
def randomPasswordGenerator(length):
return ''.join(random.choice(characters) for i in xrange(length))
# >>> randomPasswordGenerator(8)
# 'bDpHVxiO'
# Haah! That was cake! Now in this terrible tutorial, we're going to
# prohibit the use of defining ANYTHING outside of the lambda function,
# including any kind of variable, or import. So, how are we going to get
# `random` and `string`. Well the answer is obvious, we're going to make
# a lambda inside of a lambda inside of a lambda. We're also going to use
# a bit of `__import__` trickery.
randomPasswordGenerator = \
(lambda random, string: # level 1
(lambda characters: # level 2
lambda length: ''.join(random.choice(characters) for i in xrange(length)) # level 3
)(string.digits + string.letters) # level 2 args
)(
__import__('random'), # level 1 args
__import__('string')
)
# Haha, wait... WHAT? That's totally unpythonic. That's disgusting. That's
# a literal abomination. Why would anyone ever want to do that EVER?
# - That's actually a good question? But then again, this tutorial is about
# how to NOT use lambdas.
## Part 3. How to give lambdas function names. ##
# In a world where absurdity peaks, and somehow we NEED a
# function name, for what ever reason. Here's how to do it.
# THIS IS NOT FOR THE WEAK HEARTED.
# First, let's start with some regular code.
def myFunc(a, b):
return a + b
# >>> myFunc
# <function myFunc at 0x...>
myLambda = lambda a, b: a + b
# >>> myLambda
# <function <lambda> at 0x...>
# Uh'oh! How are we going to give this function a name?
# Some hackery with the `new` module shall work.
myFunc = (lambda(new):
new.function(
(lambda a, b: a + b).func_code, {}, 'myFunc'
)
)(__import__('new'))
# >>> myFunc
# <function myFunc at 0x...>
# LOL! It works! Isn't that disgusting?
## Part 4. A class? With lambdas? You've got to be kidding me! ##
# If you haven't raged and exited out of this tutorial yet,
# you'll probably want to take a deep breath. Let's start with a
# simple class that we'll call `Foo`
class Foo:
classVariable = 'ImAClassVariable'
def __init__(self, a, b, c):
self._a = a
self._b = b
self._c = c
def getA(self):
return self._a
@classmethod
def aClassMethod(cls):
return cls.classVariable
@staticmethod
def aStaticMethod(a, b):
return a + b
def __repr__(self):
return '<%s: %r>' % (
self.__class__.__name__,
vars(self)
)
# Alright, that's easy enough...
# >>> p = Foo(1, 2, 3)
# >>> p
# <Foo: {'_c': 3, '_b': 2, '_a': 1}>
# >>> p.getA()
# 1
# >>> Foo.aStaticMethod(1, 1)
# 2
# >>> Foo.aClassMethod()
# 'ImAClassVariable'
# **INHALE**
# Here's it using lambdas.
Foo = (lambda(new): # level 1, we define our new variable.
new.classobj('Foo', (), dict( # return a class object.
classVariable = 'ImAClassVariable',
__init__ = (lambda self, a, b, c:
self.__dict__.update(dict(
_a = a,
_b = b,
_c = c
))
),
getA = lambda self: self._a,
aClassMethod = classmethod(
lambda cls: cls.classVariable
),
aStaticMethod = staticmethod(
lambda a, b: a + b
),
__repr__ = (lambda self:
'<%s: %r>' % (
self.__class__.__name__,
vars(self)
)
)
))
)(__import__('new')) # level 1 args
# That's all kinds of fucked up. Isn't it?
## Part 5. Flask + Lambda??? OH GOD NO STOP!!! ##
# No comment.
from flask import Flask
app = Flask('__name__')
@app.route('/')
def index():
return 'Hello World!'
app.run()
# ...
(lambda flask:
(lambda app:
(app,
app.route('/')(
lambda: 'Hello World!'
)
)[0]
)(flask.Flask('__name__')).run()
)(__import__('flask'))
## Part 6a. Twisted? In my lambdas? Unnnffff...
# ??!?!?!?!?
from twisted.internet.protocol import Factory, Protocol
from twisted.internet import reactor
import random
insults = ['You suck!', 'Loser!', 'Why are you connecting to this port? Bitch.']
class Insulter(Protocol):
def connectionMade(self):
self.transport.write(random.choice(insults))
self.transport.loseConnection()
f = Factory()
f.protocol = Insulter
reactor.listenTCP(8000, f)
reactor.run()
# Lambda time!
(lambda twisted, random, new, insults:
(twisted.internet.reactor.listenTCP(8080,
(lambda f, p:
(f, setattr(f, 'protocol', p))[0]
)(
twisted.internet.protocol.Factory(),
new.classobj('Insulter', (twisted.internet.protocol.Protocol,), dict(
connectionMade = (lambda self:
(
self.transport.write(random.choice(insults)),
self.transport.loseConnection()
)
)
)
))),
twisted.internet.reactor.run()
)
)(
(__import__('twisted.internet.protocol'), __import__('twisted.internet.reactor'))[0],
__import__('random'),
__import__('new'),
['You suck!', 'Loser!', 'Why are you connecting to this port? Bitch.']
)()
## Part 6b. Defers? In my TWISTED? IN MY LAMBDAS? WHAAAAAAAAAAAAA
from twisted.internet.protocol import Factory, Protocol
from twisted.internet import reactor
from twisted.web.client import getPage
url = 'http://api.automeme.net/text?lines=1'
class MemeGetter(Protocol):
def connectionMade(self):
getPage(url).addCallback(
self.gotResults
).addErrback(
self.gotError
)
def gotError(self, error):
self.transport.write('ERROR! %s' % error)
self.transport.loseConnection()
def gotResults(self, result):
self.transport.write(result)
self.transport.loseConnection()
f = Factory()
f.protocol = Insulter
reactor.listenTCP(8000, f)
reactor.run()
# I'm going to do it a bit differently in lambda form.. brace yourselves
(lambda twisted, new, url:
(twisted.internet.reactor.listenTCP(8080,
(lambda f, p:
(f, setattr(f, 'protocol', p))[0]
)(
twisted.internet.protocol.Factory(),
new.classobj('MemeGetter', (twisted.internet.protocol.Protocol,), dict(
connectionMade = (lambda self:
twisted.web.client.getPage(url).addCallback(
lambda result: self.transport.write(result)
).addErrback(
lambda error: self.transport.write('ERROR! %s' % error)
).addCallback(
lambda result: self.transport.loseConnection()
)
)
)
))),
twisted.internet.reactor.run()
)
)(
( __import__('twisted.internet.protocol'),
__import__('twisted.internet.reactor'),
__import__('twisted.web.client')
)[0],
__import__('new'),
'http://api.automeme.net/text?lines=1'
)()
# And that's all folks.
# It's worth mentioning that all of the lambda functions contained can be
# compacted down to a huge one liner.
@radiosilence
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It looks like lisp :O

@pirogoeth
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that made me want to kill myself.

WHAT THE FUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC-BOOM

@Akaricchi
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This is how I'm going to write all of my Python code from now on.

@tomviner
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And they said python didn't have multiline lambdas. How wrong they were.

Kind of looks like node.js gone mad.

@Niriel
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Niriel commented Nov 16, 2011

I loled. But then again I'm drunk.

@tomviner
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Drunk? I think the coder above was high!

@ynaamad
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ynaamad commented Dec 4, 2011

This is the best thing ever.

@ali
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ali commented Dec 11, 2011

Probably one of my favorite Gists so far

@adamnew123456
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I'm actually working on porting a utility which scans images from an HP network scanner, from Python 3, to pure-lambda Python 3.

It's an arcane, but absurdly fun waste of time. Hopefully you enjoyed your delve into the alchemical arts; I'll probably post mine when I finish it. You've probably caused a few of the weak-minded to descend into madness :)

@rajendrauppal
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and I thought Python was readable!

@MineRobber9000
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Y'all got any more of them LAMBDAS?!?!?!

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