You know how most classes do helpful things? This is the opposite of that.

blaher.py

#!/usr/bin/env python
# vim: ts=8 et sw=4 sts=4
from __future__ import print_function
import random, time  # pep8?  blah.
def pause_for_dramatic_effect(*a):
    time.sleep(random.choice(list(range(3,5))))
class Blaher:  # one who actively does not give a fuck.
    @classmethod  # classy tho.
    def summon(cls):  # if anyone should dare..
        pause_for_dramatic_effect()  # make em wait.
        cls._mumble('I am Blaher.')
        pause_for_dramatic_effect()
        cls._mumble('ugh why have you done this.')
        return Blaher(please='pretty')
    def __init__(self, please=False):
        if not please:  # they must ask nicely.
            raise Please  # fuck em.
        # start thrusters, engage sarcasm engine.
        pause_for_dramatic_effect() # let em stew.
    @staticmethod  # always and forever.
    def _mumble(msg):
        print('B: %s' % msg)
    def __getattr__(self, name):  # no matter what they do,
        def getem(*a, **kw):  # i'm gonna get 'em good.
            # gonna shove their stupid requests
            # right back in their stupid faces.
            ak = ' '.join(  # gonna undermine
                # their arguments
                [str(x) for x in a] + ['%s %s' % (k, v) for k, v in kw.items()]
            )
            # with a sick comeback.
            pause_for_dramatic_effect()
            # lay it on thhiiiiick.
            self._mumble('%s?  %s?  blah.' % (name, ak))
            pause_for_dramatic_effect()
            return Blaher(please='follow the chain of command.')
        return getem # blow up in their face!
    def dismiss(self, *a, **kw):
        pause_for_dramatic_effect(99999)  # this number does nothing.
        self._mumble('oh i can go now?  great.')  # classic Blaher.
        pause_for_dramatic_effect(9)  # neither does this one.
        self._evaporate()
    def _evaporate(self):
        # stop being self-referential.
        del self  # pretend to delete self.
if __name__ == '__main__':
    print('summoning a Blaher.')
    b = Blaher.summon()
    print('asking it for the thing')
    thing_getter = b.getter()
    the_thing = thing_getter.get('u no the one')
    print('asking it to have a better attitude')
    b.dont_blah_so_much('pls k thx')
    # ok it doesn't want to do anything we want it to do.
    # how can we fuck with it?
    print('maybe sarcasm will work')
    b.shouldifuckmyself('yes.  yes i should. ', you='right')
    print('hahahhahahah')
    getattr(b, 'sing a song')(
        'ok!'
        '\n   im such a pretty pretty bunny bunny'
        '\n   singing such a pretty pretty'
        '\n   song on such a sunny sunny'
        '\n   super duper most fantastic'
        '\n   awesome possum cytoplastic'
        '\n   so much fun it might be spastic'
        '\n   hippy flippy gigantospasmic'
        '\n   pretty pretty pretty pretty'
        '\n   pretty pretty daaaaayyyyyyyy'
        '\n'
    )
    b.stop_being_self_referential()
    b.dismiss()

Please change the_thing = thing_getter.get('u no the one') to "I think you no da wei"