Monit seems to block basic authentication requests from other monit instances with 501-not implemented for whatever reason (selling Mmonit? :-))
Let's solve this with a small bash script that leverages curl to download the status file in xml format and xmllint to parse the status file for the relevant status flag.
if everything goes fine, this shell script return silently.
Otherwise it fails with error code 1 resulting in a status error that can be picked up by monit. When the remote monit instance comes back to live, the script succeeds again, and we get another email for the new status change.