functions.php

<?php
/**
 * @package WordPress
 * @subpackage Classic_Theme
 */
if ( function_exists('register_sidebar') )
	register_sidebar(array(
		'before_widget' => '<li id="%1$s" class="widget %2$s">',
		'after_widget' => '</li>',
		'before_title' => '',
		'after_title' => '',
	));

/**
 * Regex's a twitter message to make it have links like all the cool kids.
 *
 * ex.
 *    @username = http://twitter.com/username
 *    #hashtag = http://twitter.com/search?q=%23hashtag
 *    http://something = <a href....
 *
 * @author Nat Welch
 */
function twitterParse($in)
{
   $pieces = explode(" ", $in);

   foreach($pieces as &$word)
   {
      if($word) {
         if($word[0] == "@") 
            $word = "<a href=\"http://twitter.com/" . preg_replace("/(@|[^[:alnum:]])/","",$word) . "/\" >" . $word . "</a>";
         else if($word[0] == "#") 
            $word = '<a href="http://twitter.com/search?q=%23' . preg_replace("/#/","",$word) . '" >' . $word . "</a>";
         else if($word[0] == "h") 
            $word = preg_replace('`((?:https?|ftp)://(\S+[[:alnum:]])/?)`','<a href="$1" alt="\2">\1</a>', $word);
      }
   }

   return implode(" ",$pieces);
}

/*
 * Calculates the time since an event
 */
function time_since($original) {
   // array of time period chunks
   $chunks = array(
      array(60 * 60 * 24 * 365 , 'year'),
      array(60 * 60 * 24 * 30 , 'month'),
      array(60 * 60 * 24 * 7, 'week'),
      array(60 * 60 * 24 , 'day'),
      array(60 * 60 , 'hour'),
      array(60 , 'minute'),
   );

   // Parse out an integer.
   $original = strtotime($original);

   $today = time(); /* Current unix time  */
   $since = $today - $original;

   if($since > 604800) {
      $print = date("M jS", $original);

      if($since > 31536000) 
         $print .= ", " . date("Y", $original);

      return $print;
   }

   // $j saves performing the count function each time around the loop
   for ($i = 0, $j = count($chunks); $i < $j; $i++) {
      $seconds = $chunks[$i][0];
      $name = $chunks[$i][1];

      // finding the biggest chunk (if the chunk fits, break)
      if (($count = floor($since / $seconds)) != 0) 
         break;
   }

   $print = ($count == 1) ? '1 '.$name : "$count {$name}s";

   return $print . " ago";
}

function pullFeed($url, $count = 5) {
   $items = array();
   try { 
      // We don't have the Curl class and remote fopen is dissabled.
      $ch = curl_init($url);
      curl_setopt($ch, CURLOPT_HEADER, 0);
      curl_setopt($ch, CURLOPT_RETURNTRANSFER, 1);
      curl_setopt($ch, CURLOPT_TRANSFERTEXT, 1);
      $xml = curl_exec($ch);
      if (curl_errno($ch)) {
         throw new Exception('Curl error: ' . curl_error($ch));
      } else {
         libxml_use_internal_errors(true);
         $feed = new SimpleXMLElement($xml);
         if (!$feed)
            throw new Exception('Error parsing twitter xml for blog.');
      }
      curl_close($ch);
   } catch (Exception $e) {
      return array();
   }

   foreach ($feed->entry as $post) {
      // We don't want "replies" in our feed.
      $text = substr($post->content[0], strpos($post->content[0], ':') + 2);
      if(!(strpos($text, '@') === 0))
         $items[] = $post;
   }

   return array_splice($items, 0, $count);
}

function getTwitter($count) {
   $twiterUrl = 'http://twitter.com/statuses/user_timeline/ifixit.atom';
   $mem = Utils::bytecache();
   $tweetKey = "twitter_cache";
   $reset = false;

   if($reset || !($ret = $mem->get($tweetKey))) {
      $tweets = pullFeed($twiterUrl, $count);
      $ret = array();

      foreach($tweets as $tweet) {
         $text = $tweet->content[0];
         $html = twitterParse(substr($text, strpos($text, ':') + 2));
         $date = time_since($tweet->published);
         $link = $tweet->link[0]['href'];
         $together = $html . ' <a href="' . $link . '" target="_blank" class="tweet_date">' . $date  . '</a> ';
         $ret[] = $together;
      }

      $mem->set($tweetKey, $ret, CACHE_SHORT);
   }

   // Return a nice error if something went wrong. Else return parsed feed.
   return $ret ? $ret :  array("There was an error retrieving the stream.");
}


?>