hnbs.user.js

// ==UserScript==
// @name        Hacker News BS Detector
// @namespace   kennethrapp1@gmail.com
// @include     https://news.ycombinator.com/*
// @version     8
// @grant       none
// ==/UserScript==
var HackerNewsBSDetector = {
    AffectDOMPath: function (expression, callback) {
        var result = document.evaluate(expression, document, null, XPathResult.ORDERED_NODE_SNAPSHOT_TYPE, null);
        if (result.snapshotLength) {
            for (i = 0; i <= result.snapshotLength - 1; i++) {
                callback.call(this, result.snapshotItem(i));
            }
        }
    },
    Run: function () {
        var dict = {
            'disrupt': 'bullshit',
            'growth hacking': 'marketing',
            'rockstar': 'arrogant jerk',
            'ninja': '2cool4u',
            'guru': 'knowitall',
            'lean': 'cheap',
            'startup': 'small business',
            'social media': 'facebook clone',
            'FREE': 'free',
            'beautiful':'ordinary',
            'NSA' : 'Nazi Security Administration',
            "PHP" : "<?php echo htmlspecialchars($_POST['SHIT SANDWICH']); ?>",
            "Uber": "Uberstank",
            "our network":"butt",
            "Snowden":"Snowjob",
            'cloud': (function () {
                var a = [
                    'rental servers',
                    'butt'
                ];
                return a[Math.floor(Math.random() * a.length)];
            }) ()
        };
        this.AffectDOMPath('//span[@class=\'comment\']', function (node) {
            
            var words = node.innerHTML.split(' ');
            
            if (words.length) {
                
                for (var i = 0; i < words.length; i++) {
                    
                    for (d in dict) {
                        
                        if ((words[i].indexOf('href="') && words[i].indexOf('rel="nofollow"') == - 1)) {
                            
                            regex = new RegExp('^'+d+'$', 'gim');
              
                            words[i] = words[i].replace(regex, '<a name="rel" title="'+encodeURIComponent(words[i])+'" style="color:#31688c">'+dict[d]+'</a>');
                        }
                    }
                }
                
                node.innerHTML = words.join(' ');
            }
        });
    }
}.Run();