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Alice's Adventures in Wonderland |
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ALICE'S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND |
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Lewis Carroll |
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THE MILLENNIUM FULCRUM EDITION 3.0 |
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CHAPTER I |
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Down the Rabbit-Hole |
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Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister |
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on the bank, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had |
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peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no |
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pictures or conversations in it, `and what is the use of a book,' |
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thought Alice `without pictures or conversation?' |
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So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, |
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for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether |
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the pleasure of making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble |
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of getting up and picking the daisies, when suddenly a White |
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Rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her. |
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There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice |
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think it so VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to |
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itself, `Oh dear! Oh dear! I shall be late!' (when she thought |
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it over afterwards, it occurred to her that she ought to have |
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wondered at this, but at the time it all seemed quite natural); |
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but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT- |
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POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on, Alice started to |
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her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had never |
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before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to |
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take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the |
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field after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop |
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down a large rabbit-hole under the hedge. |
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In another moment down went Alice after it, never once |
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considering how in the world she was to get out again. |
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The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tunnel for some way, |
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and then dipped suddenly down, so suddenly that Alice had not a |
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moment to think about stopping herself before she found herself |
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falling down a very deep well. |
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Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she |
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had plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to |
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wonder what was going to happen next. First, she tried to look |
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down and make out what she was coming to, but it was too dark to |
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see anything; then she looked at the sides of the well, and |
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noticed that they were filled with cupboards and book-shelves; |
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here and there she saw maps and pictures hung upon pegs. She |
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took down a jar from one of the shelves as she passed; it was |
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labelled `ORANGE MARMALADE', but to her great disappointment it |
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was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear of killing |
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somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as she |
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fell past it. |
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`Well!' thought Alice to herself, `after such a fall as this, I |
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shall think nothing of tumbling down stairs! How brave they'll |
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all think me at home! Why, I wouldn't say anything about it, |
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even if I fell off the top of the house!' (Which was very likely |
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true.) |
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Down, down, down. Would the fall NEVER come to an end! `I |
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wonder how many miles I've fallen by this time?' she said aloud. |
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`I must be getting somewhere near the centre of the earth. Let |
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me see: that would be four thousand miles down, I think--' (for, |
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you see, Alice had learnt several things of this sort in her |
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lessons in the schoolroom, and though this was not a VERY good |
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opportunity for showing off her knowledge, as there was no one to |
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listen to her, still it was good practice to say it over) `--yes, |
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that's about the right distance--but then I wonder what Latitude |
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or Longitude I've got to?' (Alice had no idea what Latitude was, |
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or Longitude either, but thought they were nice grand words to |
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say.) |
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Presently she began again. `I wonder if I shall fall right |
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THROUGH the earth! How funny it'll seem to come out among the |
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people that walk with their heads downward! The Antipathies, I |
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think--' (she was rather glad there WAS no one listening, this |
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time, as it didn't sound at all the right word) `--but I shall |
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have to ask them what the name of the country is, you know. |
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Please, Ma'am, is this New Zealand or Australia?' (and she tried |
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to curtsey as she spoke--fancy CURTSEYING as you're falling |
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through the air! Do you think you could manage it?) `And what |
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an ignorant little girl she'll think me for asking! No, it'll |
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never do to ask: perhaps I shall see it written up somewhere.' |
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Down, down, down. There was nothing else to do, so Alice soon |
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began talking again. `Dinah'll miss me very much to-night, I |
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should think!' (Dinah was the cat.) `I hope they'll remember |
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her saucer of milk at tea-time. Dinah my dear! I wish you were |
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down here with me! There are no mice in the air, I'm afraid, but |
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you might catch a bat, and that's very like a mouse, you know. |
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But do cats eat bats, I wonder?' And here Alice began to get |
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rather sleepy, and went on saying to herself, in a dreamy sort of |
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way, `Do cats eat bats? Do cats eat bats?' and sometimes, `Do |
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bats eat cats?' for, you see, as she couldn't answer either |
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question, it didn't much matter which way she put it. She felt |
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that she was dozing off, and had just begun to dream that she |
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was walking hand in hand with Dinah, and saying to her very |
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earnestly, `Now, Dinah, tell me the truth: did you ever eat a |
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bat?' when suddenly, thump! thump! down she came upon a heap of |
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sticks and dry leaves, and the fall was over. |
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Alice was not a bit hurt, and she jumped up on to her feet in a |
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moment: she looked up, but it was all dark overhead; before her |
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was another long passage, and the White Rabbit was still in |
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sight, hurrying down it. There was not a moment to be lost: |
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away went Alice like the wind, and was just in time to hear it |
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say, as it turned a corner, `Oh my ears and whiskers, how late |
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it's getting!' She was close behind it when she turned the |
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corner, but the Rabbit was no longer to be seen: she found |
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herself in a long, low hall, which was lit up by a row of lamps |
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hanging from the roof. |
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There were doors all round the hall, but they were all locked; |
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and when Alice had been all the way down one side and up the |
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other, trying every door, she walked sadly down the middle, |
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wondering how she was ever to get out again. |
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Suddenly she came upon a little three-legged table, all made of |
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solid glass; there was nothing on it except a tiny golden key, |
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and Alice's first thought was that it might belong to one of the |
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doors of the hall; but, alas! either the locks were too large, or |
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the key was too small, but at any rate it would not open any of |
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them. However, on the second time round, she came upon a low |
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curtain she had not noticed before, and behind it was a little |
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door about fifteen inches high: she tried the little golden key |
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in the lock, and to her great delight it fitted! |
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Alice opened the door and found that it led into a small |
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passage, not much larger than a rat-hole: she knelt down and |
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looked along the passage into the loveliest garden you ever saw. |
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How she longed to get out of that dark hall, and wander about |
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among those beds of bright flowers and those cool fountains, but |
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she could not even get her head through the doorway; `and even if |
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my head would go through,' thought poor Alice, `it would be of |
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very little use without my shoulders. Oh, how I wish |
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I could shut up like a telescope! I think I could, if I only |
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know how to begin.' For, you see, so many out-of-the-way things |
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had happened lately, that Alice had begun to think that very few |
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things indeed were really impossible. |
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There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so she |
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went back to the table, half hoping she might find another key on |
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it, or at any rate a book of rules for shutting people up like |
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telescopes: this time she found a little bottle on it, (`which |
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certainly was not here before,' said Alice,) and round the neck |
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of the bottle was a paper label, with the words `DRINK ME' |
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beautifully printed on it in large letters. |
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It was all very well to say `Drink me,' but the wise little |
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Alice was not going to do THAT in a hurry. `No, I'll look |
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first,' she said, `and see whether it's marked "poison" or not'; |
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for she had read several nice little histories about children who |
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had got burnt, and eaten up by wild beasts and other unpleasant |
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things, all because they WOULD not remember the simple rules |
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their friends had taught them: such as, that a red-hot poker |
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will burn you if you hold it too long; and that if you cut your |
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finger VERY deeply with a knife, it usually bleeds; and she had |
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never forgotten that, if you drink much from a bottle marked |
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`poison,' it is almost certain to disagree with you, sooner or |
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later. |
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However, this bottle was NOT marked `poison,' so Alice ventured |
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to taste it, and finding it very nice, (it had, in fact, a sort |
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of mixed flavour of cherry-tart, custard, pine-apple, roast |
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turkey, toffee, and hot buttered toast,) she very soon finished |
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it off. |
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* * * * * * * |
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* * * * * * |
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`What a curious feeling!' said Alice; `I must be shutting up |
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like a telescope.' |
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And so it was indeed: she was now only ten inches high, and |
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her face brightened up at the thought that she was now the right |
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size for going through the little door into that lovely garden. |
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First, however, she waited for a few minutes to see if she was |
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going to shrink any further: she felt a little nervous about |
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this; `for it might end, you know,' said Alice to herself, `in my |
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going out altogether, like a candle. I wonder what I should be |
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like then?' And she tried to fancy what the flame of a candle is |
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like after the candle is blown out, for she could not remember |
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ever having seen such a thing. |
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After a while, finding that nothing more happened, she decided |
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on going into the garden at once; but, alas for poor Alice! |
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when she got to the door, she found she had forgotten the |
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little golden key, and when she went back to the table for it, |
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she found she could not possibly reach it: she could see it |
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quite plainly through the glass, and she tried her best to climb |
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up one of the legs of the table, but it was too slippery; |
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and when she had tired herself out with trying, |
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the poor little thing sat down and cried. |
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`Come, there's no use in crying like that!' said Alice to |
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herself, rather sharply; `I advise you to leave off this minute!' |
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She generally gave herself very good advice, (though she very |
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seldom followed it), and sometimes she scolded herself so |
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severely as to bring tears into her eyes; and once she remembered |
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trying to box her own ears for having cheated herself in a game |
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of croquet she was playing against herself, for this curious |
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child was very fond of pretending to be two people. `But it's no |
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use now,' thought poor Alice, `to pretend to be two people! Why, |
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there's hardly enough of me left to make ONE respectable |
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person!' |
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Soon her eye fell on a little glass box that was lying under |
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the table: she opened it, and found in it a very small cake, on |
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which the words `EAT ME' were beautifully marked in currants. |
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`Well, I'll eat it,' said Alice, `and if it makes me grow larger, |
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I can reach the key; and if it makes me grow smaller, I can creep |
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under the door; so either way I'll get into the garden, and I |
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don't care which happens!' |
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She ate a little bit, and said anxiously to herself, `Which |
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way? Which way?', holding her hand on the top of her head to |
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feel which way it was growing, and she was quite surprised to |
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find that she remained the same size: to be sure, this generally |
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happens when one eats cake, but Alice had got so much into the |
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way of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way things to happen, |
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that it seemed quite dull and stupid for life to go on in the |
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common way. |
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So she set to work, and very soon finished off the cake. |
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CHAPTER II |
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The Pool of Tears |
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`Curiouser and curiouser!' cried Alice (she was so much |
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surprised, that for the moment she quite forgot how to speak good |
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English); `now I'm opening out like the largest telescope that |
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ever was! Good-bye, feet!' (for when she looked down at her |
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feet, they seemed to be almost out of sight, they were getting so |
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far off). `Oh, my poor little feet, I wonder who will put on |
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your shoes and stockings for you now, dears? I'm sure _I_ shan't |
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be able! I shall be a great deal too far off to trouble myself |
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about you: you must manage the best way you can; --but I must be |
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kind to them,' thought Alice, `or perhaps they won't walk the |
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way I want to go! Let me see: I'll give them a new pair of |
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boots every Christmas.' |
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And she went on planning to herself how she would manage it. |
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`They must go by the carrier,' she thought; `and how funny it'll |
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seem, sending presents to one's own feet! And how odd the |
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directions will look! |
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ALICE'S RIGHT FOOT, ESQ. |
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HEARTHRUG, |
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NEAR THE FENDER, |
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(WITH ALICE'S LOVE). |
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Oh dear, what nonsense I'm talking!' |
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Just then her head struck against the roof of the hall: in |
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fact she was now more than nine feet high, and she at once took |
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up the little golden key and hurried off to the garden door. |
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Poor Alice! It was as much as she could do, lying down on one |
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side, to look through into the garden with one eye; but to get |
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through was more hopeless than ever: she sat down and began to |
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cry again. |
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`You ought to be ashamed of yourself,' said Alice, `a great |
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girl like you,' (she might well say this), `to go on crying in |
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this way! Stop this moment, I tell you!' But she went on all |
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the same, shedding gallons of tears, until there was a large pool |
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all round her, about four inches deep and reaching half down the |
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hall. |
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After a time she heard a little pattering of feet in the |
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distance, and she hastily dried her eyes to see what was coming. |
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It was the White Rabbit returning, splendidly dressed, with a |
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pair of white kid gloves in one hand and a large fan in the |
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other: he came trotting along in a great hurry, muttering to |
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himself as he came, `Oh! the Duchess, the Duchess! Oh! won't she |
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be savage if I've kept her waiting!' Alice felt so desperate |
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that she was ready to ask help of any one; so, when the Rabbit |
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came near her, she began, in a low, timid voice, `If you please, |
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sir--' The Rabbit started violently, dropped the white kid |
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gloves and the fan, and skurried away into the darkness as hard |
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as he could go. |
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Alice took up the fan and gloves, and, as the hall was very |
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hot, she kept fanning herself all the time she went on talking: |
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`Dear, dear! How queer everything is to-day! And yesterday |
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things went on just as usual. I wonder if I've been changed in |
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the night? Let me think: was I the same when I got up this |
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morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a little |
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different. But if I'm not the same, the next question is, Who in |
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the world am I? Ah, THAT'S the great puzzle!' And she began |
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thinking over all the children she knew that were of the same age |
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as herself, to see if she could have been changed for any of |
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them. |
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`I'm sure I'm not Ada,' she said, `for her hair goes in such |
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long ringlets, and mine doesn't go in ringlets at all; and I'm |
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sure I can't be Mabel, for I know all sorts of things, and she, |
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oh! she knows such a very little! Besides, SHE'S she, and I'm I, |
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and--oh dear, how puzzling it all is! I'll try if I know all the |
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things I used to know. Let me see: four times five is twelve, |
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and four times six is thirteen, and four times seven is--oh dear! |
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I shall never get to twenty at that rate! However, the |
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Multiplication Table doesn't signify: let's try Geography. |
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London is the capital of Paris, and Paris is the capital of Rome, |
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and Rome--no, THAT'S all wrong, I'm certain! I must have been |
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changed for Mabel! I'll try and say "How doth the little--"' |
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and she crossed her hands on her lap as if she were saying lessons, |
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and began to repeat it, but her voice sounded hoarse and |
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strange, and the words did not come the same as they used to do:-- |
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`How doth the little crocodile |
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Improve his shining tail, |
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And pour the waters of the Nile |
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On every golden scale! |
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`How cheerfully he seems to grin, |
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How neatly spread his claws, |
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And welcome little fishes in |
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With gently smiling jaws!' |
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`I'm sure those are not the right words,' said poor Alice, and |
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her eyes filled with tears again as she went on, `I must be Mabel |
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after all, and I shall have to go and live in that poky little |
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house, and have next to no toys to play with, and oh! ever so |
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many lessons to learn! No, I've made up my mind about it; if I'm |
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Mabel, I'll stay down here! It'll be no use their putting their |
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heads down and saying "Come up again, dear!" I shall only look |
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up and say "Who am I then? Tell me that first, and then, if I |
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like being that person, I'll come up: if not, I'll stay down |
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here till I'm somebody else"--but, oh dear!' cried Alice, with a |
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sudden burst of tears, `I do wish they WOULD put their heads |
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down! I am so VERY tired of being all alone here!' |
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As she said this she looked down at her hands, and was |
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surprised to see that she had put on one of the Rabbit's little |
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white kid gloves while she was talking. `How CAN I have done |
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that?' she thought. `I must be growing small again.' She got up |
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and went to the table to measure herself by it, and found that, |
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as nearly as she could guess, she was now about two feet high, |
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and was going on shrinking rapidly: she soon found out that the |
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cause of this was the fan she was holding, and she dropped it |
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hastily, just in time to avoid shrinking away altogether. |
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`That WAS a narrow escape!' said Alice, a good deal frightened at |
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the sudden change, but very glad to find herself still in |
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existence; `and now for the garden!' and she ran with all speed |
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back to the little door: but, alas! the little door was shut |
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again, and the little golden key was lying on the glass table as |
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before, `and things are worse than ever,' thought the poor child, |
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`for I never was so small as this before, never! And I declare |
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it's too bad, that it is!' |
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As she said these words her foot slipped, and in another |
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moment, splash! she was up to her chin in salt water. Her first |
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idea was that she had somehow fallen into the sea, `and in that |
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case I can go back by railway,' she said to herself. (Alice had |
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been to the seaside once in her life, and had come to the general |
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conclusion, that wherever you go to on the English coast you find |
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a number of bathing machines in the sea, some children digging in |
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the sand with wooden spades, then a row of lodging houses, and |
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behind them a railway station.) However, she soon made out that |
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she was in the pool of tears which she had wept when she was nine |
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feet high. |
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`I wish I hadn't cried so much!' said Alice, as she swam about, |
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trying to find her way out. `I shall be punished for it now, I |
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suppose, by being drowned in my own tears! That WILL be a queer |
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thing, to be sure! However, everything is queer to-day.' |
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Just then she heard something splashing about in the pool a |
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little way off, and she swam nearer to make out what it was: at |
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first she thought it must be a walrus or hippopotamus, but then |
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she remembered how small she was now, and she soon made out that |
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it was only a mouse that had slipped in like herself. |
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`Would it be of any use, now,' thought Alice, `to speak to this |
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mouse? Everything is so out-of-the-way down here, that I should |
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think very likely it can talk: at any rate, there's no harm in |
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trying.' So she began: `O Mouse, do you know the way out of |
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this pool? I am very tired of swimming about here, O Mouse!' |
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(Alice thought this must be the right way of speaking to a mouse: |
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she had never done such a thing before, but she remembered having |
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seen in her brother's Latin Grammar, `A mouse--of a mouse--to a |
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mouse--a mouse--O mouse!') The Mouse looked at her rather |
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inquisitively, and seemed to her to wink with one of its little |
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eyes, but it said nothing. |
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`Perhaps it doesn't understand English,' thought Alice; `I |
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daresay it's a French mouse, come over with William the |
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Conqueror.' (For, with all her knowledge of history, Alice had |
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no very clear notion how long ago anything had happened.) So she |
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began again: `Ou est ma chatte?' which was the first sentence in |
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her French lesson-book. The Mouse gave a sudden leap out of the |
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water, and seemed to quiver all over with fright. `Oh, I beg |
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your pardon!' cried Alice hastily, afraid that she had hurt the |
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poor animal's feelings. `I quite forgot you didn't like cats.' |
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`Not like cats!' cried the Mouse, in a shrill, passionate |
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voice. `Would YOU like cats if you were me?' |
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`Well, perhaps not,' said Alice in a soothing tone: `don't be |
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angry about it. And yet I wish I could show you our cat Dinah: |
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I think you'd take a fancy to cats if you could only see her. |
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She is such a dear quiet thing,' Alice went on, half to herself, |
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as she swam lazily about in the pool, `and she sits purring so |
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nicely by the fire, licking her paws and washing her face--and |
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she is such a nice soft thing to nurse--and she's such a capital |
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one for catching mice--oh, I beg your pardon!' cried Alice again, |
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for this time the Mouse was bristling all over, and she felt |
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certain it must be really offended. `We won't talk about her any |
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more if you'd rather not.' |
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`We indeed!' cried the Mouse, who was trembling down to the end |
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of his tail. `As if I would talk on such a subject! Our family |
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always HATED cats: nasty, low, vulgar things! Don't let me hear |
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the name again!' |
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`I won't indeed!' said Alice, in a great hurry to change the |
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subject of conversation. `Are you--are you fond--of--of dogs?' |
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The Mouse did not answer, so Alice went on eagerly: `There is |
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such a nice little dog near our house I should like to show you! |
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A little bright-eyed terrier, you know, with oh, such long curly |
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brown hair! And it'll fetch things when you throw them, and |
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it'll sit up and beg for its dinner, and all sorts of things--I |
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can't remember half of them--and it belongs to a farmer, you |
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know, and he says it's so useful, it's worth a hundred pounds! |
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He says it kills all the rats and--oh dear!' cried Alice in a |
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sorrowful tone, `I'm afraid I've offended it again!' For the |
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Mouse was swimming away from her as hard as it could go, and |
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making quite a commotion in the pool as it went. |
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So she called softly after it, `Mouse dear! Do come back |
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again, and we won't talk about cats or dogs either, if you don't |
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like them!' When the Mouse heard this, it turned round and swam |
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slowly back to her: its face was quite pale (with passion, Alice |
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thought), and it said in a low trembling voice, `Let us get to |
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the shore, and then I'll tell you my history, and you'll |
|
understand why it is I hate cats and dogs.' |
|
|
|
It was high time to go, for the pool was getting quite crowded |
|
with the birds and animals that had fallen into it: there were a |
|
Duck and a Dodo, a Lory and an Eaglet, and several other curious |
|
creatures. Alice led the way, and the whole party swam to the |
|
shore. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER III |
|
|
|
A Caucus-Race and a Long Tale |
|
|
|
|
|
They were indeed a queer-looking party that assembled on the |
|
bank--the birds with draggled feathers, the animals with their |
|
fur clinging close to them, and all dripping wet, cross, and |
|
uncomfortable. |
|
|
|
The first question of course was, how to get dry again: they |
|
had a consultation about this, and after a few minutes it seemed |
|
quite natural to Alice to find herself talking familiarly with |
|
them, as if she had known them all her life. Indeed, she had |
|
quite a long argument with the Lory, who at last turned sulky, |
|
and would only say, `I am older than you, and must know better'; |
|
and this Alice would not allow without knowing how old it was, |
|
and, as the Lory positively refused to tell its age, there was no |
|
more to be said. |
|
|
|
At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among |
|
them, called out, `Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL |
|
soon make you dry enough!' They all sat down at once, in a large |
|
ring, with the Mouse in the middle. Alice kept her eyes |
|
anxiously fixed on it, for she felt sure she would catch a bad |
|
cold if she did not get dry very soon. |
|
|
|
`Ahem!' said the Mouse with an important air, `are you all ready? |
|
This is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! |
|
"William the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was |
|
soon submitted to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been |
|
of late much accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and |
|
Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northumbria--"' |
|
|
|
`Ugh!' said the Lory, with a shiver. |
|
|
|
`I beg your pardon!' said the Mouse, frowning, but very |
|
politely: `Did you speak?' |
|
|
|
`Not I!' said the Lory hastily. |
|
|
|
`I thought you did,' said the Mouse. `--I proceed. "Edwin and |
|
Morcar, the earls of Mercia and Northumbria, declared for him: |
|
and even Stigand, the patriotic archbishop of Canterbury, found |
|
it advisable--"' |
|
|
|
`Found WHAT?' said the Duck. |
|
|
|
`Found IT,' the Mouse replied rather crossly: `of course you |
|
know what "it" means.' |
|
|
|
`I know what "it" means well enough, when I find a thing,' said |
|
the Duck: `it's generally a frog or a worm. The question is, |
|
what did the archbishop find?' |
|
|
|
The Mouse did not notice this question, but hurriedly went on, |
|
`"--found it advisable to go with Edgar Atheling to meet William |
|
and offer him the crown. William's conduct at first was |
|
moderate. But the insolence of his Normans--" How are you |
|
getting on now, my dear?' it continued, turning to Alice as it |
|
spoke. |
|
|
|
`As wet as ever,' said Alice in a melancholy tone: `it doesn't |
|
seem to dry me at all.' |
|
|
|
`In that case,' said the Dodo solemnly, rising to its feet, `I |
|
move that the meeting adjourn, for the immediate adoption of more |
|
energetic remedies--' |
|
|
|
`Speak English!' said the Eaglet. `I don't know the meaning of |
|
half those long words, and, what's more, I don't believe you do |
|
either!' And the Eaglet bent down its head to hide a smile: |
|
some of the other birds tittered audibly. |
|
|
|
`What I was going to say,' said the Dodo in an offended tone, |
|
`was, that the best thing to get us dry would be a Caucus-race.' |
|
|
|
`What IS a Caucus-race?' said Alice; not that she wanted much |
|
to know, but the Dodo had paused as if it thought that SOMEBODY |
|
ought to speak, and no one else seemed inclined to say anything. |
|
|
|
`Why,' said the Dodo, `the best way to explain it is to do it.' |
|
(And, as you might like to try the thing yourself, some winter |
|
day, I will tell you how the Dodo managed it.) |
|
|
|
First it marked out a race-course, in a sort of circle, (`the |
|
exact shape doesn't matter,' it said,) and then all the party |
|
were placed along the course, here and there. There was no `One, |
|
two, three, and away,' but they began running when they liked, |
|
and left off when they liked, so that it was not easy to know |
|
when the race was over. However, when they had been running half |
|
an hour or so, and were quite dry again, the Dodo suddenly called |
|
out `The race is over!' and they all crowded round it, panting, |
|
and asking, `But who has won?' |
|
|
|
This question the Dodo could not answer without a great deal of |
|
thought, and it sat for a long time with one finger pressed upon |
|
its forehead (the position in which you usually see Shakespeare, |
|
in the pictures of him), while the rest waited in silence. At |
|
last the Dodo said, `EVERYBODY has won, and all must have |
|
prizes.' |
|
|
|
`But who is to give the prizes?' quite a chorus of voices |
|
asked. |
|
|
|
`Why, SHE, of course,' said the Dodo, pointing to Alice with |
|
one finger; and the whole party at once crowded round her, |
|
calling out in a confused way, `Prizes! Prizes!' |
|
|
|
Alice had no idea what to do, and in despair she put her hand |
|
in her pocket, and pulled out a box of comfits, (luckily the salt |
|
water had not got into it), and handed them round as prizes. |
|
There was exactly one a-piece all round. |
|
|
|
`But she must have a prize herself, you know,' said the Mouse. |
|
|
|
`Of course,' the Dodo replied very gravely. `What else have |
|
you got in your pocket?' he went on, turning to Alice. |
|
|
|
`Only a thimble,' said Alice sadly. |
|
|
|
`Hand it over here,' said the Dodo. |
|
|
|
Then they all crowded round her once more, while the Dodo |
|
solemnly presented the thimble, saying `We beg your acceptance of |
|
this elegant thimble'; and, when it had finished this short |
|
speech, they all cheered. |
|
|
|
Alice thought the whole thing very absurd, but they all looked |
|
so grave that she did not dare to laugh; and, as she could not |
|
think of anything to say, she simply bowed, and took the thimble, |
|
looking as solemn as she could. |
|
|
|
The next thing was to eat the comfits: this caused some noise |
|
and confusion, as the large birds complained that they could not |
|
taste theirs, and the small ones choked and had to be patted on |
|
the back. However, it was over at last, and they sat down again |
|
in a ring, and begged the Mouse to tell them something more. |
|
|
|
`You promised to tell me your history, you know,' said Alice, |
|
`and why it is you hate--C and D,' she added in a whisper, half |
|
afraid that it would be offended again. |
|
|
|
`Mine is a long and a sad tale!' said the Mouse, turning to |
|
Alice, and sighing. |
|
|
|
`It IS a long tail, certainly,' said Alice, looking down with |
|
wonder at the Mouse's tail; `but why do you call it sad?' And |
|
she kept on puzzling about it while the Mouse was speaking, so |
|
that her idea of the tale was something like this:-- |
|
|
|
`Fury said to a |
|
mouse, That he |
|
met in the |
|
house, |
|
"Let us |
|
both go to |
|
law: I will |
|
prosecute |
|
YOU. --Come, |
|
I'll take no |
|
denial; We |
|
must have a |
|
trial: For |
|
really this |
|
morning I've |
|
nothing |
|
to do." |
|
Said the |
|
mouse to the |
|
cur, "Such |
|
a trial, |
|
dear Sir, |
|
With |
|
no jury |
|
or judge, |
|
would be |
|
wasting |
|
our |
|
breath." |
|
"I'll be |
|
judge, I'll |
|
be jury," |
|
Said |
|
cunning |
|
old Fury: |
|
"I'll |
|
try the |
|
whole |
|
cause, |
|
and |
|
condemn |
|
you |
|
to |
|
death."' |
|
|
|
|
|
`You are not attending!' said the Mouse to Alice severely. |
|
`What are you thinking of?' |
|
|
|
`I beg your pardon,' said Alice very humbly: `you had got to |
|
the fifth bend, I think?' |
|
|
|
`I had NOT!' cried the Mouse, sharply and very angrily. |
|
|
|
`A knot!' said Alice, always ready to make herself useful, and |
|
looking anxiously about her. `Oh, do let me help to undo it!' |
|
|
|
`I shall do nothing of the sort,' said the Mouse, getting up |
|
and walking away. `You insult me by talking such nonsense!' |
|
|
|
`I didn't mean it!' pleaded poor Alice. `But you're so easily |
|
offended, you know!' |
|
|
|
The Mouse only growled in reply. |
|
|
|
`Please come back and finish your story!' Alice called after |
|
it; and the others all joined in chorus, `Yes, please do!' but |
|
the Mouse only shook its head impatiently, and walked a little |
|
quicker. |
|
|
|
`What a pity it wouldn't stay!' sighed the Lory, as soon as it |
|
was quite out of sight; and an old Crab took the opportunity of |
|
saying to her daughter `Ah, my dear! Let this be a lesson to you |
|
never to lose YOUR temper!' `Hold your tongue, Ma!' said the |
|
young Crab, a little snappishly. `You're enough to try the |
|
patience of an oyster!' |
|
|
|
`I wish I had our Dinah here, I know I do!' said Alice aloud, |
|
addressing nobody in particular. `She'd soon fetch it back!' |
|
|
|
`And who is Dinah, if I might venture to ask the question?' |
|
said the Lory. |
|
|
|
Alice replied eagerly, for she was always ready to talk about |
|
her pet: `Dinah's our cat. And she's such a capital one for |
|
catching mice you can't think! And oh, I wish you could see her |
|
after the birds! Why, she'll eat a little bird as soon as look |
|
at it!' |
|
|
|
This speech caused a remarkable sensation among the party. |
|
Some of the birds hurried off at once: one old Magpie began |
|
wrapping itself up very carefully, remarking, `I really must be |
|
getting home; the night-air doesn't suit my throat!' and a Canary |
|
called out in a trembling voice to its children, `Come away, my |
|
dears! It's high time you were all in bed!' On various pretexts |
|
they all moved off, and Alice was soon left alone. |
|
|
|
`I wish I hadn't mentioned Dinah!' she said to herself in a |
|
melancholy tone. `Nobody seems to like her, down here, and I'm |
|
sure she's the best cat in the world! Oh, my dear Dinah! I |
|
wonder if I shall ever see you any more!' And here poor Alice |
|
began to cry again, for she felt very lonely and low-spirited. |
|
In a little while, however, she again heard a little pattering of |
|
footsteps in the distance, and she looked up eagerly, half hoping |
|
that the Mouse had changed his mind, and was coming back to |
|
finish his story. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER IV |
|
|
|
The Rabbit Sends in a Little Bill |
|
|
|
|
|
It was the White Rabbit, trotting slowly back again, and |
|
looking anxiously about as it went, as if it had lost something; |
|
and she heard it muttering to itself `The Duchess! The Duchess! |
|
Oh my dear paws! Oh my fur and whiskers! She'll get me |
|
executed, as sure as ferrets are ferrets! Where CAN I have |
|
dropped them, I wonder?' Alice guessed in a moment that it was |
|
looking for the fan and the pair of white kid gloves, and she |
|
very good-naturedly began hunting about for them, but they were |
|
nowhere to be seen--everything seemed to have changed since her |
|
swim in the pool, and the great hall, with the glass table and |
|
the little door, had vanished completely. |
|
|
|
Very soon the Rabbit noticed Alice, as she went hunting about, |
|
and called out to her in an angry tone, `Why, Mary Ann, what ARE |
|
you doing out here? Run home this moment, and fetch me a pair of |
|
gloves and a fan! Quick, now!' And Alice was so much frightened |
|
that she ran off at once in the direction it pointed to, without |
|
trying to explain the mistake it had made. |
|
|
|
`He took me for his housemaid,' she said to herself as she ran. |
|
`How surprised he'll be when he finds out who I am! But I'd |
|
better take him his fan and gloves--that is, if I can find them.' |
|
As she said this, she came upon a neat little house, on the door |
|
of which was a bright brass plate with the name `W. RABBIT' |
|
engraved upon it. She went in without knocking, and hurried |
|
upstairs, in great fear lest she should meet the real Mary Ann, |
|
and be turned out of the house before she had found the fan and |
|
gloves. |
|
|
|
`How queer it seems,' Alice said to herself, `to be going |
|
messages for a rabbit! I suppose Dinah'll be sending me on |
|
messages next!' And she began fancying the sort of thing that |
|
would happen: `"Miss Alice! Come here directly, and get ready |
|
for your walk!" "Coming in a minute, nurse! But I've got to see |
|
that the mouse doesn't get out." Only I don't think,' Alice went |
|
on, `that they'd let Dinah stop in the house if it began ordering |
|
people about like that!' |
|
|
|
By this time she had found her way into a tidy little room with |
|
a table in the window, and on it (as she had hoped) a fan and two |
|
or three pairs of tiny white kid gloves: she took up the fan and |
|
a pair of the gloves, and was just going to leave the room, when |
|
her eye fell upon a little bottle that stood near the looking- |
|
glass. There was no label this time with the words `DRINK ME,' |
|
but nevertheless she uncorked it and put it to her lips. `I know |
|
SOMETHING interesting is sure to happen,' she said to herself, |
|
`whenever I eat or drink anything; so I'll just see what this |
|
bottle does. I do hope it'll make me grow large again, for |
|
really I'm quite tired of being such a tiny little thing!' |
|
|
|
It did so indeed, and much sooner than she had expected: |
|
before she had drunk half the bottle, she found her head pressing |
|
against the ceiling, and had to stoop to save her neck from being |
|
broken. She hastily put down the bottle, saying to herself |
|
`That's quite enough--I hope I shan't grow any more--As it is, I |
|
can't get out at the door--I do wish I hadn't drunk quite so |
|
much!' |
|
|
|
Alas! it was too late to wish that! She went on growing, and |
|
growing, and very soon had to kneel down on the floor: in |
|
another minute there was not even room for this, and she tried |
|
the effect of lying down with one elbow against the door, and the |
|
other arm curled round her head. Still she went on growing, and, |
|
as a last resource, she put one arm out of the window, and one |
|
foot up the chimney, and said to herself `Now I can do no more, |
|
whatever happens. What WILL become of me?' |
|
|
|
Luckily for Alice, the little magic bottle had now had its full |
|
effect, and she grew no larger: still it was very uncomfortable, |
|
and, as there seemed to be no sort of chance of her ever getting |
|
out of the room again, no wonder she felt unhappy. |
|
|
|
`It was much pleasanter at home,' thought poor Alice, `when one |
|
wasn't always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about |
|
by mice and rabbits. I almost wish I hadn't gone down that |
|
rabbit-hole--and yet--and yet--it's rather curious, you know, |
|
this sort of life! I do wonder what CAN have happened to me! |
|
When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that kind of thing |
|
never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one! There |
|
ought to be a book written about me, that there ought! And when |
|
I grow up, I'll write one--but I'm grown up now,' she added in a |
|
sorrowful tone; `at least there's no room to grow up any more |
|
HERE.' |
|
|
|
`But then,' thought Alice, `shall I NEVER get any older than I |
|
am now? That'll be a comfort, one way--never to be an old woman-- |
|
but then--always to have lessons to learn! Oh, I shouldn't like THAT!' |
|
|
|
`Oh, you foolish Alice!' she answered herself. `How can you |
|
learn lessons in here? Why, there's hardly room for YOU, and no |
|
room at all for any lesson-books!' |
|
|
|
And so she went on, taking first one side and then the other, |
|
and making quite a conversation of it altogether; but after a few |
|
minutes she heard a voice outside, and stopped to listen. |
|
|
|
`Mary Ann! Mary Ann!' said the voice. `Fetch me my gloves |
|
this moment!' Then came a little pattering of feet on the |
|
stairs. Alice knew it was the Rabbit coming to look for her, and |
|
she trembled till she shook the house, quite forgetting that she |
|
was now about a thousand times as large as the Rabbit, and had no |
|
reason to be afraid of it. |
|
|
|
Presently the Rabbit came up to the door, and tried to open it; |
|
but, as the door opened inwards, and Alice's elbow was pressed |
|
hard against it, that attempt proved a failure. Alice heard it |
|
say to itself `Then I'll go round and get in at the window.' |
|
|
|
`THAT you won't' thought Alice, and, after waiting till she |
|
fancied she heard the Rabbit just under the window, she suddenly |
|
spread out her hand, and made a snatch in the air. She did not |
|
get hold of anything, but she heard a little shriek and a fall, |
|
and a crash of broken glass, from which she concluded that it was |
|
just possible it had fallen into a cucumber-frame, or something |
|
of the sort. |
|
|
|
Next came an angry voice--the Rabbit's--`Pat! Pat! Where are |
|
you?' And then a voice she had never heard before, `Sure then |
|
I'm here! Digging for apples, yer honour!' |
|
|
|
`Digging for apples, indeed!' said the Rabbit angrily. `Here! |
|
Come and help me out of THIS!' (Sounds of more broken glass.) |
|
|
|
`Now tell me, Pat, what's that in the window?' |
|
|
|
`Sure, it's an arm, yer honour!' (He pronounced it `arrum.') |
|
|
|
`An arm, you goose! Who ever saw one that size? Why, it |
|
fills the whole window!' |
|
|
|
`Sure, it does, yer honour: but it's an arm for all that.' |
|
|
|
`Well, it's got no business there, at any rate: go and take it |
|
away!' |
|
|
|
There was a long silence after this, and Alice could only hear |
|
whispers now and then; such as, `Sure, I don't like it, yer |
|
honour, at all, at all!' `Do as I tell you, you coward!' and at |
|
last she spread out her hand again, and made another snatch in |
|
the air. This time there were TWO little shrieks, and more |
|
sounds of broken glass. `What a number of cucumber-frames there |
|
must be!' thought Alice. `I wonder what they'll do next! As for |
|
pulling me out of the window, I only wish they COULD! I'm sure I |
|
don't want to stay in here any longer!' |
|
|
|
She waited for some time without hearing anything more: at |
|
last came a rumbling of little cartwheels, and the sound of a |
|
good many voices all talking together: she made out the words: |
|
`Where's the other ladder?--Why, I hadn't to bring but one; |
|
Bill's got the other--Bill! fetch it here, lad!--Here, put 'em up |
|
at this corner--No, tie 'em together first--they don't reach half |
|
high enough yet--Oh! they'll do well enough; don't be particular-- |
|
Here, Bill! catch hold of this rope--Will the roof bear?--Mind |
|
that loose slate--Oh, it's coming down! Heads below!' (a loud |
|
crash)--`Now, who did that?--It was Bill, I fancy--Who's to go |
|
down the chimney?--Nay, I shan't! YOU do it!--That I won't, |
|
then!--Bill's to go down--Here, Bill! the master says you're to |
|
go down the chimney!' |
|
|
|
`Oh! So Bill's got to come down the chimney, has he?' said |
|
Alice to herself. `Shy, they seem to put everything upon Bill! |
|
I wouldn't be in Bill's place for a good deal: this fireplace is |
|
narrow, to be sure; but I THINK I can kick a little!' |
|
|
|
She drew her foot as far down the chimney as she could, and |
|
waited till she heard a little animal (she couldn't guess of what |
|
sort it was) scratching and scrambling about in the chimney close |
|
above her: then, saying to herself `This is Bill,' she gave one |
|
sharp kick, and waited to see what would happen next. |
|
|
|
The first thing she heard was a general chorus of `There goes |
|
Bill!' then the Rabbit's voice along--`Catch him, you by the |
|
hedge!' then silence, and then another confusion of voices--`Hold |
|
up his head--Brandy now--Don't choke him--How was it, old fellow? |
|
What happened to you? Tell us all about it!' |
|
|
|
Last came a little feeble, squeaking voice, (`That's Bill,' |
|
thought Alice,) `Well, I hardly know--No more, thank ye; I'm |
|
better now--but I'm a deal too flustered to tell you--all I know |
|
is, something comes at me like a Jack-in-the-box, and up I goes |
|
like a sky-rocket!' |
|
|
|
`So you did, old fellow!' said the others. |
|
|
|
`We must burn the house down!' said the Rabbit's voice; and |
|
Alice called out as loud as she could, `If you do. I'll set |
|
Dinah at you!' |
|
|
|
There was a dead silence instantly, and Alice thought to |
|
herself, `I wonder what they WILL do next! If they had any |
|
sense, they'd take the roof off.' After a minute or two, they |
|
began moving about again, and Alice heard the Rabbit say, `A |
|
barrowful will do, to begin with.' |
|
|
|
`A barrowful of WHAT?' thought Alice; but she had not long to |
|
doubt, for the next moment a shower of little pebbles came |
|
rattling in at the window, and some of them hit her in the face. |
|
`I'll put a stop to this,' she said to herself, and shouted out, |
|
`You'd better not do that again!' which produced another dead |
|
silence. |
|
|
|
Alice noticed with some surprise that the pebbles were all |
|
turning into little cakes as they lay on the floor, and a bright |
|
idea came into her head. `If I eat one of these cakes,' she |
|
thought, `it's sure to make SOME change in my size; and as it |
|
can't possibly make me larger, it must make me smaller, I |
|
suppose.' |
|
|
|
So she swallowed one of the cakes, and was delighted to find |
|
that she began shrinking directly. As soon as she was small |
|
enough to get through the door, she ran out of the house, and |
|
found quite a crowd of little animals and birds waiting outside. |
|
The poor little Lizard, Bill, was in the middle, being held up by |
|
two guinea-pigs, who were giving it something out of a bottle. |
|
They all made a rush at Alice the moment she appeared; but she |
|
ran off as hard as she could, and soon found herself safe in a |
|
thick wood. |
|
|
|
`The first thing I've got to do,' said Alice to herself, as she |
|
wandered about in the wood, `is to grow to my right size again; |
|
and the second thing is to find my way into that lovely garden. |
|
I think that will be the best plan.' |
|
|
|
It sounded an excellent plan, no doubt, and very neatly and |
|
simply arranged; the only difficulty was, that she had not the |
|
smallest idea how to set about it; and while she was peering |
|
about anxiously among the trees, a little sharp bark just over |
|
her head made her look up in a great hurry. |
|
|
|
An enormous puppy was looking down at her with large round |
|
eyes, and feebly stretching out one paw, trying to touch her. |
|
`Poor little thing!' said Alice, in a coaxing tone, and she tried |
|
hard to whistle to it; but she was terribly frightened all the |
|
time at the thought that it might be hungry, in which case it |
|
would be very likely to eat her up in spite of all her coaxing. |
|
|
|
Hardly knowing what she did, she picked up a little bit of |
|
stick, and held it out to the puppy; whereupon the puppy jumped |
|
into the air off all its feet at once, with a yelp of delight, |
|
and rushed at the stick, and made believe to worry it; then Alice |
|
dodged behind a great thistle, to keep herself from being run |
|
over; and the moment she appeared on the other side, the puppy |
|
made another rush at the stick, and tumbled head over heels in |
|
its hurry to get hold of it; then Alice, thinking it was very |
|
like having a game of play with a cart-horse, and expecting every |
|
moment to be trampled under its feet, ran round the thistle |
|
again; then the puppy began a series of short charges at the |
|
stick, running a very little way forwards each time and a long |
|
way back, and barking hoarsely all the while, till at last it sat |
|
down a good way off, panting, with its tongue hanging out of its |
|
mouth, and its great eyes half shut. |
|
|
|
This seemed to Alice a good opportunity for making her escape; |
|
so she set off at once, and ran till she was quite tired and out |
|
of breath, and till the puppy's bark sounded quite faint in the |
|
distance. |
|
|
|
`And yet what a dear little puppy it was!' said Alice, as she |
|
leant against a buttercup to rest herself, and fanned herself |
|
with one of the leaves: `I should have liked teaching it tricks |
|
very much, if--if I'd only been the right size to do it! Oh |
|
dear! I'd nearly forgotten that I've got to grow up again! Let |
|
me see--how IS it to be managed? I suppose I ought to eat or |
|
drink something or other; but the great question is, what?' |
|
|
|
The great question certainly was, what? Alice looked all round |
|
her at the flowers and the blades of grass, but she did not see |
|
anything that looked like the right thing to eat or drink under |
|
the circumstances. There was a large mushroom growing near her, |
|
about the same height as herself; and when she had looked under |
|
it, and on both sides of it, and behind it, it occurred to her |
|
that she might as well look and see what was on the top of it. |
|
|
|
She stretched herself up on tiptoe, and peeped over the edge of |
|
the mushroom, and her eyes immediately met those of a large |
|
caterpillar, that was sitting on the top with its arms folded, |
|
quietly smoking a long hookah, and taking not the smallest notice |
|
of her or of anything else. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER V |
|
|
|
Advice from a Caterpillar |
|
|
|
|
|
The Caterpillar and Alice looked at each other for some time in |
|
silence: at last the Caterpillar took the hookah out of its |
|
mouth, and addressed her in a languid, sleepy voice. |
|
|
|
`Who are YOU?' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
This was not an encouraging opening for a conversation. Alice |
|
replied, rather shyly, `I--I hardly know, sir, just at present-- |
|
at least I know who I WAS when I got up this morning, but I think |
|
I must have been changed several times since then.' |
|
|
|
`What do you mean by that?' said the Caterpillar sternly. |
|
`Explain yourself!' |
|
|
|
`I can't explain MYSELF, I'm afraid, sir' said Alice, `because |
|
I'm not myself, you see.' |
|
|
|
`I don't see,' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
`I'm afraid I can't put it more clearly,' Alice replied very |
|
politely, `for I can't understand it myself to begin with; and |
|
being so many different sizes in a day is very confusing.' |
|
|
|
`It isn't,' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
`Well, perhaps you haven't found it so yet,' said Alice; `but |
|
when you have to turn into a chrysalis--you will some day, you |
|
know--and then after that into a butterfly, I should think you'll |
|
feel it a little queer, won't you?' |
|
|
|
`Not a bit,' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
`Well, perhaps your feelings may be different,' said Alice; |
|
`all I know is, it would feel very queer to ME.' |
|
|
|
`You!' said the Caterpillar contemptuously. `Who are YOU?' |
|
|
|
Which brought them back again to the beginning of the |
|
conversation. Alice felt a little irritated at the Caterpillar's |
|
making such VERY short remarks, and she drew herself up and said, |
|
very gravely, `I think, you ought to tell me who YOU are, first.' |
|
|
|
`Why?' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
Here was another puzzling question; and as Alice could not |
|
think of any good reason, and as the Caterpillar seemed to be in |
|
a VERY unpleasant state of mind, she turned away. |
|
|
|
`Come back!' the Caterpillar called after her. `I've something |
|
important to say!' |
|
|
|
This sounded promising, certainly: Alice turned and came back |
|
again. |
|
|
|
`Keep your temper,' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
`Is that all?' said Alice, swallowing down her anger as well as |
|
she could. |
|
|
|
`No,' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
Alice thought she might as well wait, as she had nothing else |
|
to do, and perhaps after all it might tell her something worth |
|
hearing. For some minutes it puffed away without speaking, but |
|
at last it unfolded its arms, took the hookah out of its mouth |
|
again, and said, `So you think you're changed, do you?' |
|
|
|
`I'm afraid I am, sir,' said Alice; `I can't remember things as |
|
I used--and I don't keep the same size for ten minutes together!' |
|
|
|
`Can't remember WHAT things?' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
`Well, I've tried to say "HOW DOTH THE LITTLE BUSY BEE," but it |
|
all came different!' Alice replied in a very melancholy voice. |
|
|
|
`Repeat, "YOU ARE OLD, FATHER WILLIAM,"' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
Alice folded her hands, and began:-- |
|
|
|
`You are old, Father William,' the young man said, |
|
`And your hair has become very white; |
|
And yet you incessantly stand on your head-- |
|
Do you think, at your age, it is right?' |
|
|
|
`In my youth,' Father William replied to his son, |
|
`I feared it might injure the brain; |
|
But, now that I'm perfectly sure I have none, |
|
Why, I do it again and again.' |
|
|
|
`You are old,' said the youth, `as I mentioned before, |
|
And have grown most uncommonly fat; |
|
Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door-- |
|
Pray, what is the reason of that?' |
|
|
|
`In my youth,' said the sage, as he shook his grey locks, |
|
`I kept all my limbs very supple |
|
By the use of this ointment--one shilling the box-- |
|
Allow me to sell you a couple?' |
|
|
|
`You are old,' said the youth, `and your jaws are too weak |
|
For anything tougher than suet; |
|
Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak-- |
|
Pray how did you manage to do it?' |
|
|
|
`In my youth,' said his father, `I took to the law, |
|
And argued each case with my wife; |
|
And the muscular strength, which it gave to my jaw, |
|
Has lasted the rest of my life.' |
|
|
|
`You are old,' said the youth, `one would hardly suppose |
|
That your eye was as steady as ever; |
|
Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose-- |
|
What made you so awfully clever?' |
|
|
|
`I have answered three questions, and that is enough,' |
|
Said his father; `don't give yourself airs! |
|
Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff? |
|
Be off, or I'll kick you down stairs!' |
|
|
|
|
|
`That is not said right,' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
`Not QUITE right, I'm afraid,' said Alice, timidly; `some of the |
|
words have got altered.' |
|
|
|
`It is wrong from beginning to end,' said the Caterpillar |
|
decidedly, and there was silence for some minutes. |
|
|
|
The Caterpillar was the first to speak. |
|
|
|
`What size do you want to be?' it asked. |
|
|
|
`Oh, I'm not particular as to size,' Alice hastily replied; |
|
`only one doesn't like changing so often, you know.' |
|
|
|
`I DON'T know,' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
Alice said nothing: she had never been so much contradicted in |
|
her life before, and she felt that she was losing her temper. |
|
|
|
`Are you content now?' said the Caterpillar. |
|
|
|
`Well, I should like to be a LITTLE larger, sir, if you |
|
wouldn't mind,' said Alice: `three inches is such a wretched |
|
height to be.' |
|
|
|
`It is a very good height indeed!' said the Caterpillar |
|
angrily, rearing itself upright as it spoke (it was exactly three |
|
inches high). |
|
|
|
`But I'm not used to it!' pleaded poor Alice in a piteous tone. |
|
And she thought of herself, `I wish the creatures wouldn't be so |
|
easily offended!' |
|
|
|
`You'll get used to it in time,' said the Caterpillar; and it |
|
put the hookah into its mouth and began smoking again. |
|
|
|
This time Alice waited patiently until it chose to speak again. |
|
In a minute or two the Caterpillar took the hookah out of its |
|
mouth and yawned once or twice, and shook itself. Then it got |
|
down off the mushroom, and crawled away in the grass, merely |
|
remarking as it went, `One side will make you grow taller, and |
|
the other side will make you grow shorter.' |
|
|
|
`One side of WHAT? The other side of WHAT?' thought Alice to |
|
herself. |
|
|
|
`Of the mushroom,' said the Caterpillar, just as if she had |
|
asked it aloud; and in another moment it was out of sight. |
|
|
|
Alice remained looking thoughtfully at the mushroom for a |
|
minute, trying to make out which were the two sides of it; and as |
|
it was perfectly round, she found this a very difficult question. |
|
However, at last she stretched her arms round it as far as they |
|
would go, and broke off a bit of the edge with each hand. |
|
|
|
`And now which is which?' she said to herself, and nibbled a |
|
little of the right-hand bit to try the effect: the next moment |
|
she felt a violent blow underneath her chin: it had struck her |
|
foot! |
|
|
|
She was a good deal frightened by this very sudden change, but |
|
she felt that there was no time to be lost, as she was shrinking |
|
rapidly; so she set to work at once to eat some of the other bit. |
|
Her chin was pressed so closely against her foot, that there was |
|
hardly room to open her mouth; but she did it at last, and |
|
managed to swallow a morsel of the lefthand bit. |
|
|
|
|
|
* * * * * * * |
|
|
|
* * * * * * |
|
|
|
* * * * * * * |
|
|
|
`Come, my head's free at last!' said Alice in a tone of |
|
delight, which changed into alarm in another moment, when she |
|
found that her shoulders were nowhere to be found: all she could |
|
see, when she looked down, was an immense length of neck, which |
|
seemed to rise like a stalk out of a sea of green leaves that lay |
|
far below her. |
|
|
|
`What CAN all that green stuff be?' said Alice. `And where |
|
HAVE my shoulders got to? And oh, my poor hands, how is it I |
|
can't see you?' She was moving them about as she spoke, but no |
|
result seemed to follow, except a little shaking among the |
|
distant green leaves. |
|
|
|
As there seemed to be no chance of getting her hands up to her |
|
head, she tried to get her head down to them, and was delighted |
|
to find that her neck would bend about easily in any direction, |
|
like a serpent. She had just succeeded in curving it down into a |
|
graceful zigzag, and was going to dive in among the leaves, which |
|
she found to be nothing but the tops of the trees under which she |
|
had been wandering, when a sharp hiss made her draw back in a |
|
hurry: a large pigeon had flown into her face, and was beating |
|
her violently with its wings. |
|
|
|
`Serpent!' screamed the Pigeon. |
|
|
|
`I'm NOT a serpent!' said Alice indignantly. `Let me alone!' |
|
|
|
`Serpent, I say again!' repeated the Pigeon, but in a more |
|
subdued tone, and added with a kind of sob, `I've tried every |
|
way, and nothing seems to suit them!' |
|
|
|
`I haven't the least idea what you're talking about,' said |
|
Alice. |
|
|
|
`I've tried the roots of trees, and I've tried banks, and I've |
|
tried hedges,' the Pigeon went on, without attending to her; `but |
|
those serpents! There's no pleasing them!' |
|
|
|
Alice was more and more puzzled, but she thought there was no |
|
use in saying anything more till the Pigeon had finished. |
|
|
|
`As if it wasn't trouble enough hatching the eggs,' said the |
|
Pigeon; `but I must be on the look-out for serpents night and |
|
day! Why, I haven't had a wink of sleep these three weeks!' |
|
|
|
`I'm very sorry you've been annoyed,' said Alice, who was |
|
beginning to see its meaning. |
|
|
|
`And just as I'd taken the highest tree in the wood,' continued |
|
the Pigeon, raising its voice to a shriek, `and just as I was |
|
thinking I should be free of them at last, they must needs come |
|
wriggling down from the sky! Ugh, Serpent!' |
|
|
|
`But I'm NOT a serpent, I tell you!' said Alice. `I'm a--I'm |
|
a--' |
|
|
|
`Well! WHAT are you?' said the Pigeon. `I can see you're |
|
trying to invent something!' |
|
|
|
`I--I'm a little girl,' said Alice, rather doubtfully, as she |
|
remembered the number of changes she had gone through that day. |
|
|
|
`A likely story indeed!' said the Pigeon in a tone of the |
|
deepest contempt. `I've seen a good many little girls in my |
|
time, but never ONE with such a neck as that! No, no! You're a |
|
serpent; and there's no use denying it. I suppose you'll be |
|
telling me next that you never tasted an egg!' |
|
|
|
`I HAVE tasted eggs, certainly,' said Alice, who was a very |
|
truthful child; `but little girls eat eggs quite as much as |
|
serpents do, you know.' |
|
|
|
`I don't believe it,' said the Pigeon; `but if they do, why |
|
then they're a kind of serpent, that's all I can say.' |
|
|
|
This was such a new idea to Alice, that she was quite silent |
|
for a minute or two, which gave the Pigeon the opportunity of |
|
adding, `You're looking for eggs, I know THAT well enough; and |
|
what does it matter to me whether you're a little girl or a |
|
serpent?' |
|
|
|
`It matters a good deal to ME,' said Alice hastily; `but I'm |
|
not looking for eggs, as it happens; and if I was, I shouldn't |
|
want YOURS: I don't like them raw.' |
|
|
|
`Well, be off, then!' said the Pigeon in a sulky tone, as it |
|
settled down again into its nest. Alice crouched down among the |
|
trees as well as she could, for her neck kept getting entangled |
|
among the branches, and every now and then she had to stop and |
|
untwist it. After a while she remembered that she still held the |
|
pieces of mushroom in her hands, and she set to work very |
|
carefully, nibbling first at one and then at the other, and |
|
growing sometimes taller and sometimes shorter, until she had |
|
succeeded in bringing herself down to her usual height. |
|
|
|
It was so long since she had been anything near the right size, |
|
that it felt quite strange at first; but she got used to it in a |
|
few minutes, and began talking to herself, as usual. `Come, |
|
there's half my plan done now! How puzzling all these changes |
|
are! I'm never sure what I'm going to be, from one minute to |
|
another! However, I've got back to my right size: the next |
|
thing is, to get into that beautiful garden--how IS that to be |
|
done, I wonder?' As she said this, she came suddenly upon an |
|
open place, with a little house in it about four feet high. |
|
`Whoever lives there,' thought Alice, `it'll never do to come |
|
upon them THIS size: why, I should frighten them out of their |
|
wits!' So she began nibbling at the righthand bit again, and did |
|
not venture to go near the house till she had brought herself |
|
down to nine inches high. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER VI |
|
|
|
Pig and Pepper |
|
|
|
|
|
For a minute or two she stood looking at the house, and |
|
wondering what to do next, when suddenly a footman in livery came |
|
running out of the wood--(she considered him to be a footman |
|
because he was in livery: otherwise, judging by his face only, |
|
she would have called him a fish)--and rapped loudly at the door |
|
with his knuckles. It was opened by another footman in livery, |
|
with a round face, and large eyes like a frog; and both footmen, |
|
Alice noticed, had powdered hair that curled all over their |
|
heads. She felt very curious to know what it was all about, and |
|
crept a little way out of the wood to listen. |
|
|
|
The Fish-Footman began by producing from under his arm a great |
|
letter, nearly as large as himself, and this he handed over to |
|
the other, saying, in a solemn tone, `For the Duchess. An |
|
invitation from the Queen to play croquet.' The Frog-Footman |
|
repeated, in the same solemn tone, only changing the order of the |
|
words a little, `From the Queen. An invitation for the Duchess |
|
to play croquet.' |
|
|
|
Then they both bowed low, and their curls got entangled |
|
together. |
|
|
|
Alice laughed so much at this, that she had to run back into |
|
the wood for fear of their hearing her; and when she next peeped |
|
out the Fish-Footman was gone, and the other was sitting on the |
|
ground near the door, staring stupidly up into the sky. |
|
|
|
Alice went timidly up to the door, and knocked. |
|
|
|
`There's no sort of use in knocking,' said the Footman, `and |
|
that for two reasons. First, because I'm on the same side of the |
|
door as you are; secondly, because they're making such a noise |
|
inside, no one could possibly hear you.' And certainly there was |
|
a most extraordinary noise going on within--a constant howling |
|
and sneezing, and every now and then a great crash, as if a dish |
|
or kettle had been broken to pieces. |
|
|
|
`Please, then,' said Alice, `how am I to get in?' |
|
|
|
`There might be some sense in your knocking,' the Footman went |
|
on without attending to her, `if we had the door between us. For |
|
instance, if you were INSIDE, you might knock, and I could let |
|
you out, you know.' He was looking up into the sky all the time |
|
he was speaking, and this Alice thought decidedly uncivil. `But |
|
perhaps he can't help it,' she said to herself; `his eyes are so |
|
VERY nearly at the top of his head. But at any rate he might |
|
answer questions.--How am I to get in?' she repeated, aloud. |
|
|
|
`I shall sit here,' the Footman remarked, `till tomorrow--' |
|
|
|
At this moment the door of the house opened, and a large plate |
|
came skimming out, straight at the Footman's head: it just |
|
grazed his nose, and broke to pieces against one of the trees |
|
behind him. |
|
|
|
`--or next day, maybe,' the Footman continued in the same tone, |
|
exactly as if nothing had happened. |
|
|
|
`How am I to get in?' asked Alice again, in a louder tone. |
|
|
|
`ARE you to get in at all?' said the Footman. `That's the |
|
first question, you know.' |
|
|
|
It was, no doubt: only Alice did not like to be told so. |
|
`It's really dreadful,' she muttered to herself, `the way all the |
|
creatures argue. It's enough to drive one crazy!' |
|
|
|
The Footman seemed to think this a good opportunity for |
|
repeating his remark, with variations. `I shall sit here,' he |
|
said, `on and off, for days and days.' |
|
|
|
`But what am I to do?' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Anything you like,' said the Footman, and began whistling. |
|
|
|
`Oh, there's no use in talking to him,' said Alice desperately: |
|
`he's perfectly idiotic!' And she opened the door and went in. |
|
|
|
The door led right into a large kitchen, which was full of |
|
smoke from one end to the other: the Duchess was sitting on a |
|
three-legged stool in the middle, nursing a baby; the cook was |
|
leaning over the fire, stirring a large cauldron which seemed to |
|
be full of soup. |
|
|
|
`There's certainly too much pepper in that soup!' Alice said to |
|
herself, as well as she could for sneezing. |
|
|
|
There was certainly too much of it in the air. Even the |
|
Duchess sneezed occasionally; and as for the baby, it was |
|
sneezing and howling alternately without a moment's pause. The |
|
only things in the kitchen that did not sneeze, were the cook, |
|
and a large cat which was sitting on the hearth and grinning from |
|
ear to ear. |
|
|
|
`Please would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, for |
|
she was not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to |
|
speak first, `why your cat grins like that?' |
|
|
|
`It's a Cheshire cat,' said the Duchess, `and that's why. Pig!' |
|
|
|
She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice |
|
quite jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed |
|
to the baby, and not to her, so she took courage, and went on |
|
again:-- |
|
|
|
`I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I |
|
didn't know that cats COULD grin.' |
|
|
|
`They all can,' said the Duchess; `and most of 'em do.' |
|
|
|
`I don't know of any that do,' Alice said very politely, |
|
feeling quite pleased to have got into a conversation. |
|
|
|
`You don't know much,' said the Duchess; `and that's a fact.' |
|
|
|
Alice did not at all like the tone of this remark, and thought |
|
it would be as well to introduce some other subject of |
|
conversation. While she was trying to fix on one, the cook took |
|
the cauldron of soup off the fire, and at once set to work |
|
throwing everything within her reach at the Duchess and the baby |
|
--the fire-irons came first; then followed a shower of saucepans, |
|
plates, and dishes. The Duchess took no notice of them even when |
|
they hit her; and the baby was howling so much already, that it |
|
was quite impossible to say whether the blows hurt it or not. |
|
|
|
`Oh, PLEASE mind what you're doing!' cried Alice, jumping up |
|
and down in an agony of terror. `Oh, there goes his PRECIOUS |
|
nose'; as an unusually large saucepan flew close by it, and very |
|
nearly carried it off. |
|
|
|
`If everybody minded their own business,' the Duchess said in a |
|
hoarse growl, `the world would go round a deal faster than it |
|
does.' |
|
|
|
`Which would NOT be an advantage,' said Alice, who felt very |
|
glad to get an opportunity of showing off a little of her |
|
knowledge. `Just think of what work it would make with the day |
|
and night! You see the earth takes twenty-four hours to turn |
|
round on its axis--' |
|
|
|
`Talking of axes,' said the Duchess, `chop off her head!' |
|
|
|
Alice glanced rather anxiously at the cook, to see if she meant |
|
to take the hint; but the cook was busily stirring the soup, and |
|
seemed not to be listening, so she went on again: `Twenty-four |
|
hours, I THINK; or is it twelve? I--' |
|
|
|
`Oh, don't bother ME,' said the Duchess; `I never could abide |
|
figures!' And with that she began nursing her child again, |
|
singing a sort of lullaby to it as she did so, and giving it a |
|
violent shake at the end of every line: |
|
|
|
`Speak roughly to your little boy, |
|
And beat him when he sneezes: |
|
He only does it to annoy, |
|
Because he knows it teases.' |
|
|
|
CHORUS. |
|
|
|
(In which the cook and the baby joined):-- |
|
|
|
`Wow! wow! wow!' |
|
|
|
While the Duchess sang the second verse of the song, she kept |
|
tossing the baby violently up and down, and the poor little thing |
|
howled so, that Alice could hardly hear the words:-- |
|
|
|
`I speak severely to my boy, |
|
I beat him when he sneezes; |
|
For he can thoroughly enjoy |
|
The pepper when he pleases!' |
|
|
|
CHORUS. |
|
|
|
`Wow! wow! wow!' |
|
|
|
`Here! you may nurse it a bit, if you like!' the Duchess said |
|
to Alice, flinging the baby at her as she spoke. `I must go and |
|
get ready to play croquet with the Queen,' and she hurried out of |
|
the room. The cook threw a frying-pan after her as she went out, |
|
but it just missed her. |
|
|
|
Alice caught the baby with some difficulty, as it was a queer- |
|
shaped little creature, and held out its arms and legs in all |
|
directions, `just like a star-fish,' thought Alice. The poor |
|
little thing was snorting like a steam-engine when she caught it, |
|
and kept doubling itself up and straightening itself out again, |
|
so that altogether, for the first minute or two, it was as much |
|
as she could do to hold it. |
|
|
|
As soon as she had made out the proper way of nursing it, |
|
(which was to twist it up into a sort of knot, and then keep |
|
tight hold of its right ear and left foot, so as to prevent its |
|
undoing itself,) she carried it out into the open air. `IF I |
|
don't take this child away with me,' thought Alice, `they're sure |
|
to kill it in a day or two: wouldn't it be murder to leave it |
|
behind?' She said the last words out loud, and the little thing |
|
grunted in reply (it had left off sneezing by this time). `Don't |
|
grunt,' said Alice; `that's not at all a proper way of expressing |
|
yourself.' |
|
|
|
The baby grunted again, and Alice looked very anxiously into |
|
its face to see what was the matter with it. There could be no |
|
doubt that it had a VERY turn-up nose, much more like a snout |
|
than a real nose; also its eyes were getting extremely small for |
|
a baby: altogether Alice did not like the look of the thing at |
|
all. `But perhaps it was only sobbing,' she thought, and looked |
|
into its eyes again, to see if there were any tears. |
|
|
|
No, there were no tears. `If you're going to turn into a pig, |
|
my dear,' said Alice, seriously, `I'll have nothing more to do |
|
with you. Mind now!' The poor little thing sobbed again (or |
|
grunted, it was impossible to say which), and they went on for |
|
some while in silence. |
|
|
|
Alice was just beginning to think to herself, `Now, what am I |
|
to do with this creature when I get it home?' when it grunted |
|
again, so violently, that she looked down into its face in some |
|
alarm. This time there could be NO mistake about it: it was |
|
neither more nor less than a pig, and she felt that it would be |
|
quite absurd for her to carry it further. |
|
|
|
So she set the little creature down, and felt quite relieved to |
|
see it trot away quietly into the wood. `If it had grown up,' |
|
she said to herself, `it would have made a dreadfully ugly child: |
|
but it makes rather a handsome pig, I think.' And she began |
|
thinking over other children she knew, who might do very well as |
|
pigs, and was just saying to herself, `if one only knew the right |
|
way to change them--' when she was a little startled by seeing |
|
the Cheshire Cat sitting on a bough of a tree a few yards off. |
|
|
|
The Cat only grinned when it saw Alice. It looked good- |
|
natured, she thought: still it had VERY long claws and a great |
|
many teeth, so she felt that it ought to be treated with respect. |
|
|
|
`Cheshire Puss,' she began, rather timidly, as she did not at |
|
all know whether it would like the name: however, it only |
|
grinned a little wider. `Come, it's pleased so far,' thought |
|
Alice, and she went on. `Would you tell me, please, which way I |
|
ought to go from here?' |
|
|
|
`That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,' said |
|
the Cat. |
|
|
|
`I don't much care where--' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Then it doesn't matter which way you go,' said the Cat. |
|
|
|
`--so long as I get SOMEWHERE,' Alice added as an explanation. |
|
|
|
`Oh, you're sure to do that,' said the Cat, `if you only walk |
|
long enough.' |
|
|
|
Alice felt that this could not be denied, so she tried another |
|
question. `What sort of people live about here?' |
|
|
|
`In THAT direction,' the Cat said, waving its right paw round, |
|
`lives a Hatter: and in THAT direction,' waving the other paw, |
|
`lives a March Hare. Visit either you like: they're both mad.' |
|
|
|
`But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked. |
|
|
|
`Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. |
|
I'm mad. You're mad.' |
|
|
|
`How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.' |
|
|
|
Alice didn't think that proved it at all; however, she went on |
|
`And how do you know that you're mad?' |
|
|
|
`To begin with,' said the Cat, `a dog's not mad. You grant |
|
that?' |
|
|
|
`I suppose so,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Well, then,' the Cat went on, `you see, a dog growls when it's |
|
angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm |
|
pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad.' |
|
|
|
`I call it purring, not growling,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Call it what you like,' said the Cat. `Do you play croquet |
|
with the Queen to-day?' |
|
|
|
`I should like it very much,' said Alice, `but I haven't been |
|
invited yet.' |
|
|
|
`You'll see me there,' said the Cat, and vanished. |
|
|
|
Alice was not much surprised at this, she was getting so used |
|
to queer things happening. While she was looking at the place |
|
where it had been, it suddenly appeared again. |
|
|
|
`By-the-bye, what became of the baby?' said the Cat. `I'd |
|
nearly forgotten to ask.' |
|
|
|
`It turned into a pig,' Alice quietly said, just as if it had |
|
come back in a natural way. |
|
|
|
`I thought it would,' said the Cat, and vanished again. |
|
|
|
Alice waited a little, half expecting to see it again, but it |
|
did not appear, and after a minute or two she walked on in the |
|
direction in which the March Hare was said to live. `I've seen |
|
hatters before,' she said to herself; `the March Hare will be |
|
much the most interesting, and perhaps as this is May it won't be |
|
raving mad--at least not so mad as it was in March.' As she said |
|
this, she looked up, and there was the Cat again, sitting on a |
|
branch of a tree. |
|
|
|
`Did you say pig, or fig?' said the Cat. |
|
|
|
`I said pig,' replied Alice; `and I wish you wouldn't keep |
|
appearing and vanishing so suddenly: you make one quite giddy.' |
|
|
|
`All right,' said the Cat; and this time it vanished quite slowly, |
|
beginning with the end of the tail, and ending with the grin, |
|
which remained some time after the rest of it had gone. |
|
|
|
`Well! I've often seen a cat without a grin,' thought Alice; |
|
`but a grin without a cat! It's the most curious thing I ever |
|
saw in my life!' |
|
|
|
She had not gone much farther before she came in sight of the |
|
house of the March Hare: she thought it must be the right house, |
|
because the chimneys were shaped like ears and the roof was |
|
thatched with fur. It was so large a house, that she did not |
|
like to go nearer till she had nibbled some more of the lefthand |
|
bit of mushroom, and raised herself to about two feet high: even |
|
then she walked up towards it rather timidly, saying to herself |
|
`Suppose it should be raving mad after all! I almost wish I'd |
|
gone to see the Hatter instead!' |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER VII |
|
|
|
A Mad Tea-Party |
|
|
|
|
|
There was a table set out under a tree in front of the house, |
|
and the March Hare and the Hatter were having tea at it: a |
|
Dormouse was sitting between them, fast asleep, and the other two |
|
were using it as a cushion, resting their elbows on it, and talking |
|
over its head. `Very uncomfortable for the Dormouse,' thought Alice; |
|
`only, as it's asleep, I suppose it doesn't mind.' |
|
|
|
The table was a large one, but the three were all crowded |
|
together at one corner of it: `No room! No room!' they cried |
|
out when they saw Alice coming. `There's PLENTY of room!' said |
|
Alice indignantly, and she sat down in a large arm-chair at one |
|
end of the table. |
|
|
|
`Have some wine,' the March Hare said in an encouraging tone. |
|
|
|
Alice looked all round the table, but there was nothing on it |
|
but tea. `I don't see any wine,' she remarked. |
|
|
|
`There isn't any,' said the March Hare. |
|
|
|
`Then it wasn't very civil of you to offer it,' said Alice |
|
angrily. |
|
|
|
`It wasn't very civil of you to sit down without being |
|
invited,' said the March Hare. |
|
|
|
`I didn't know it was YOUR table,' said Alice; `it's laid for a |
|
great many more than three.' |
|
|
|
`Your hair wants cutting,' said the Hatter. He had been |
|
looking at Alice for some time with great curiosity, and this was |
|
his first speech. |
|
|
|
`You should learn not to make personal remarks,' Alice said |
|
with some severity; `it's very rude.' |
|
|
|
The Hatter opened his eyes very wide on hearing this; but all |
|
he SAID was, `Why is a raven like a writing-desk?' |
|
|
|
`Come, we shall have some fun now!' thought Alice. `I'm glad |
|
they've begun asking riddles.--I believe I can guess that,' she |
|
added aloud. |
|
|
|
`Do you mean that you think you can find out the answer to it?' |
|
said the March Hare. |
|
|
|
`Exactly so,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Then you should say what you mean,' the March Hare went on. |
|
|
|
`I do,' Alice hastily replied; `at least--at least I mean what |
|
I say--that's the same thing, you know.' |
|
|
|
`Not the same thing a bit!' said the Hatter. `You might just |
|
as well say that "I see what I eat" is the same thing as "I eat |
|
what I see"!' |
|
|
|
`You might just as well say,' added the March Hare, `that "I |
|
like what I get" is the same thing as "I get what I like"!' |
|
|
|
`You might just as well say,' added the Dormouse, who seemed to |
|
be talking in his sleep, `that "I breathe when I sleep" is the |
|
same thing as "I sleep when I breathe"!' |
|
|
|
`It IS the same thing with you,' said the Hatter, and here the |
|
conversation dropped, and the party sat silent for a minute, |
|
while Alice thought over all she could remember about ravens and |
|
writing-desks, which wasn't much. |
|
|
|
The Hatter was the first to break the silence. `What day of |
|
the month is it?' he said, turning to Alice: he had taken his |
|
watch out of his pocket, and was looking at it uneasily, shaking |
|
it every now and then, and holding it to his ear. |
|
|
|
Alice considered a little, and then said `The fourth.' |
|
|
|
`Two days wrong!' sighed the Hatter. `I told you butter |
|
wouldn't suit the works!' he added looking angrily at the March |
|
Hare. |
|
|
|
`It was the BEST butter,' the March Hare meekly replied. |
|
|
|
`Yes, but some crumbs must have got in as well,' the Hatter |
|
grumbled: `you shouldn't have put it in with the bread-knife.' |
|
|
|
The March Hare took the watch and looked at it gloomily: then |
|
he dipped it into his cup of tea, and looked at it again: but he |
|
could think of nothing better to say than his first remark, `It |
|
was the BEST butter, you know.' |
|
|
|
Alice had been looking over his shoulder with some curiosity. |
|
`What a funny watch!' she remarked. `It tells the day of the |
|
month, and doesn't tell what o'clock it is!' |
|
|
|
`Why should it?' muttered the Hatter. `Does YOUR watch tell |
|
you what year it is?' |
|
|
|
`Of course not,' Alice replied very readily: `but that's |
|
because it stays the same year for such a long time together.' |
|
|
|
`Which is just the case with MINE,' said the Hatter. |
|
|
|
Alice felt dreadfully puzzled. The Hatter's remark seemed to |
|
have no sort of meaning in it, and yet it was certainly English. |
|
`I don't quite understand you,' she said, as politely as she |
|
could. |
|
|
|
`The Dormouse is asleep again,' said the Hatter, and he poured |
|
a little hot tea upon its nose. |
|
|
|
The Dormouse shook its head impatiently, and said, without |
|
opening its eyes, `Of course, of course; just what I was going to |
|
remark myself.' |
|
|
|
`Have you guessed the riddle yet?' the Hatter said, turning to |
|
Alice again. |
|
|
|
`No, I give it up,' Alice replied: `what's the answer?' |
|
|
|
`I haven't the slightest idea,' said the Hatter. |
|
|
|
`Nor I,' said the March Hare. |
|
|
|
Alice sighed wearily. `I think you might do something better |
|
with the time,' she said, `than waste it in asking riddles that |
|
have no answers.' |
|
|
|
`If you knew Time as well as I do,' said the Hatter, `you |
|
wouldn't talk about wasting IT. It's HIM.' |
|
|
|
`I don't know what you mean,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Of course you don't!' the Hatter said, tossing his head |
|
contemptuously. `I dare say you never even spoke to Time!' |
|
|
|
`Perhaps not,' Alice cautiously replied: `but I know I have to |
|
beat time when I learn music.' |
|
|
|
`Ah! that accounts for it,' said the Hatter. `He won't stand |
|
beating. Now, if you only kept on good terms with him, he'd do |
|
almost anything you liked with the clock. For instance, suppose |
|
it were nine o'clock in the morning, just time to begin lessons: |
|
you'd only have to whisper a hint to Time, and round goes the |
|
clock in a twinkling! Half-past one, time for dinner!' |
|
|
|
(`I only wish it was,' the March Hare said to itself in a |
|
whisper.) |
|
|
|
`That would be grand, certainly,' said Alice thoughtfully: |
|
`but then--I shouldn't be hungry for it, you know.' |
|
|
|
`Not at first, perhaps,' said the Hatter: `but you could keep |
|
it to half-past one as long as you liked.' |
|
|
|
`Is that the way YOU manage?' Alice asked. |
|
|
|
The Hatter shook his head mournfully. `Not I!' he replied. |
|
`We quarrelled last March--just before HE went mad, you know--' |
|
(pointing with his tea spoon at the March Hare,) `--it was at the |
|
great concert given by the Queen of Hearts, and I had to sing |
|
|
|
"Twinkle, twinkle, little bat! |
|
How I wonder what you're at!" |
|
|
|
You know the song, perhaps?' |
|
|
|
`I've heard something like it,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`It goes on, you know,' the Hatter continued, `in this way:-- |
|
|
|
"Up above the world you fly, |
|
Like a tea-tray in the sky. |
|
Twinkle, twinkle--"' |
|
|
|
Here the Dormouse shook itself, and began singing in its sleep |
|
`Twinkle, twinkle, twinkle, twinkle--' and went on so long that |
|
they had to pinch it to make it stop. |
|
|
|
`Well, I'd hardly finished the first verse,' said the Hatter, |
|
`when the Queen jumped up and bawled out, "He's murdering the |
|
time! Off with his head!"' |
|
|
|
`How dreadfully savage!' exclaimed Alice. |
|
|
|
`And ever since that,' the Hatter went on in a mournful tone, |
|
`he won't do a thing I ask! It's always six o'clock now.' |
|
|
|
A bright idea came into Alice's head. `Is that the reason so |
|
many tea-things are put out here?' she asked. |
|
|
|
`Yes, that's it,' said the Hatter with a sigh: `it's always |
|
tea-time, and we've no time to wash the things between whiles.' |
|
|
|
`Then you keep moving round, I suppose?' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Exactly so,' said the Hatter: `as the things get used up.' |
|
|
|
`But what happens when you come to the beginning again?' Alice |
|
ventured to ask. |
|
|
|
`Suppose we change the subject,' the March Hare interrupted, |
|
yawning. `I'm getting tired of this. I vote the young lady |
|
tells us a story.' |
|
|
|
`I'm afraid I don't know one,' said Alice, rather alarmed at |
|
the proposal. |
|
|
|
`Then the Dormouse shall!' they both cried. `Wake up, |
|
Dormouse!' And they pinched it on both sides at once. |
|
|
|
The Dormouse slowly opened his eyes. `I wasn't asleep,' he |
|
said in a hoarse, feeble voice: `I heard every word you fellows |
|
were saying.' |
|
|
|
`Tell us a story!' said the March Hare. |
|
|
|
`Yes, please do!' pleaded Alice. |
|
|
|
`And be quick about it,' added the Hatter, `or you'll be asleep |
|
again before it's done.' |
|
|
|
`Once upon a time there were three little sisters,' the |
|
Dormouse began in a great hurry; `and their names were Elsie, |
|
Lacie, and Tillie; and they lived at the bottom of a well--' |
|
|
|
`What did they live on?' said Alice, who always took a great |
|
interest in questions of eating and drinking. |
|
|
|
`They lived on treacle,' said the Dormouse, after thinking a |
|
minute or two. |
|
|
|
`They couldn't have done that, you know,' Alice gently |
|
remarked; `they'd have been ill.' |
|
|
|
`So they were,' said the Dormouse; `VERY ill.' |
|
|
|
Alice tried to fancy to herself what such an extraordinary ways |
|
of living would be like, but it puzzled her too much, so she went |
|
on: `But why did they live at the bottom of a well?' |
|
|
|
`Take some more tea,' the March Hare said to Alice, very |
|
earnestly. |
|
|
|
`I've had nothing yet,' Alice replied in an offended tone, `so |
|
I can't take more.' |
|
|
|
`You mean you can't take LESS,' said the Hatter: `it's very |
|
easy to take MORE than nothing.' |
|
|
|
`Nobody asked YOUR opinion,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Who's making personal remarks now?' the Hatter asked |
|
triumphantly. |
|
|
|
Alice did not quite know what to say to this: so she helped |
|
herself to some tea and bread-and-butter, and then turned to the |
|
Dormouse, and repeated her question. `Why did they live at the |
|
bottom of a well?' |
|
|
|
The Dormouse again took a minute or two to think about it, and |
|
then said, `It was a treacle-well.' |
|
|
|
`There's no such thing!' Alice was beginning very angrily, but |
|
the Hatter and the March Hare went `Sh! sh!' and the Dormouse |
|
sulkily remarked, `If you can't be civil, you'd better finish the |
|
story for yourself.' |
|
|
|
`No, please go on!' Alice said very humbly; `I won't interrupt |
|
again. I dare say there may be ONE.' |
|
|
|
`One, indeed!' said the Dormouse indignantly. However, he |
|
consented to go on. `And so these three little sisters--they |
|
were learning to draw, you know--' |
|
|
|
`What did they draw?' said Alice, quite forgetting her promise. |
|
|
|
`Treacle,' said the Dormouse, without considering at all this |
|
time. |
|
|
|
`I want a clean cup,' interrupted the Hatter: `let's all move |
|
one place on.' |
|
|
|
He moved on as he spoke, and the Dormouse followed him: the |
|
March Hare moved into the Dormouse's place, and Alice rather |
|
unwillingly took the place of the March Hare. The Hatter was the |
|
only one who got any advantage from the change: and Alice was a |
|
good deal worse off than before, as the March Hare had just upset |
|
the milk-jug into his plate. |
|
|
|
Alice did not wish to offend the Dormouse again, so she began |
|
very cautiously: `But I don't understand. Where did they draw |
|
the treacle from?' |
|
|
|
`You can draw water out of a water-well,' said the Hatter; `so |
|
I should think you could draw treacle out of a treacle-well--eh, |
|
stupid?' |
|
|
|
`But they were IN the well,' Alice said to the Dormouse, not |
|
choosing to notice this last remark. |
|
|
|
`Of course they were', said the Dormouse; `--well in.' |
|
|
|
This answer so confused poor Alice, that she let the Dormouse |
|
go on for some time without interrupting it. |
|
|
|
`They were learning to draw,' the Dormouse went on, yawning and |
|
rubbing its eyes, for it was getting very sleepy; `and they drew |
|
all manner of things--everything that begins with an M--' |
|
|
|
`Why with an M?' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Why not?' said the March Hare. |
|
|
|
Alice was silent. |
|
|
|
The Dormouse had closed its eyes by this time, and was going |
|
off into a doze; but, on being pinched by the Hatter, it woke up |
|
again with a little shriek, and went on: `--that begins with an |
|
M, such as mouse-traps, and the moon, and memory, and muchness-- |
|
you know you say things are "much of a muchness"--did you ever |
|
see such a thing as a drawing of a muchness?' |
|
|
|
`Really, now you ask me,' said Alice, very much confused, `I |
|
don't think--' |
|
|
|
`Then you shouldn't talk,' said the Hatter. |
|
|
|
This piece of rudeness was more than Alice could bear: she got |
|
up in great disgust, and walked off; the Dormouse fell asleep |
|
instantly, and neither of the others took the least notice of her |
|
going, though she looked back once or twice, half hoping that |
|
they would call after her: the last time she saw them, they were |
|
trying to put the Dormouse into the teapot. |
|
|
|
`At any rate I'll never go THERE again!' said Alice as she |
|
picked her way through the wood. `It's the stupidest tea-party I |
|
ever was at in all my life!' |
|
|
|
Just as she said this, she noticed that one of the trees had a |
|
door leading right into it. `That's very curious!' she thought. |
|
`But everything's curious today. I think I may as well go in at once.' |
|
And in she went. |
|
|
|
Once more she found herself in the long hall, and close to the |
|
little glass table. `Now, I'll manage better this time,' |
|
she said to herself, and began by taking the little golden key, |
|
and unlocking the door that led into the garden. Then she went |
|
to work nibbling at the mushroom (she had kept a piece of it |
|
in her pocket) till she was about a foot high: then she walked down |
|
the little passage: and THEN--she found herself at last in the |
|
beautiful garden, among the bright flower-beds and the cool fountains. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER VIII |
|
|
|
The Queen's Croquet-Ground |
|
|
|
|
|
A large rose-tree stood near the entrance of the garden: the |
|
roses growing on it were white, but there were three gardeners at |
|
it, busily painting them red. Alice thought this a very curious |
|
thing, and she went nearer to watch them, and just as she came up |
|
to them she heard one of them say, `Look out now, Five! Don't go |
|
splashing paint over me like that!' |
|
|
|
`I couldn't help it,' said Five, in a sulky tone; `Seven jogged |
|
my elbow.' |
|
|
|
On which Seven looked up and said, `That's right, Five! Always |
|
lay the blame on others!' |
|
|
|
`YOU'D better not talk!' said Five. `I heard the Queen say only |
|
yesterday you deserved to be beheaded!' |
|
|
|
`What for?' said the one who had spoken first. |
|
|
|
`That's none of YOUR business, Two!' said Seven. |
|
|
|
`Yes, it IS his business!' said Five, `and I'll tell him--it |
|
was for bringing the cook tulip-roots instead of onions.' |
|
|
|
Seven flung down his brush, and had just begun `Well, of all |
|
the unjust things--' when his eye chanced to fall upon Alice, as |
|
she stood watching them, and he checked himself suddenly: the |
|
others looked round also, and all of them bowed low. |
|
|
|
`Would you tell me,' said Alice, a little timidly, `why you are |
|
painting those roses?' |
|
|
|
Five and Seven said nothing, but looked at Two. Two began in a |
|
low voice, `Why the fact is, you see, Miss, this here ought to |
|
have been a RED rose-tree, and we put a white one in by mistake; |
|
and if the Queen was to find it out, we should all have our heads |
|
cut off, you know. So you see, Miss, we're doing our best, afore |
|
she comes, to--' At this moment Five, who had been anxiously |
|
looking across the garden, called out `The Queen! The Queen!' |
|
and the three gardeners instantly threw themselves flat upon |
|
their faces. There was a sound of many footsteps, and Alice |
|
looked round, eager to see the Queen. |
|
|
|
First came ten soldiers carrying clubs; these were all shaped |
|
like the three gardeners, oblong and flat, with their hands and |
|
feet at the corners: next the ten courtiers; these were |
|
ornamented all over with diamonds, and walked two and two, as the |
|
soldiers did. After these came the royal children; there were |
|
ten of them, and the little dears came jumping merrily along hand |
|
in hand, in couples: they were all ornamented with hearts. Next |
|
came the guests, mostly Kings and Queens, and among them Alice |
|
recognised the White Rabbit: it was talking in a hurried nervous |
|
manner, smiling at everything that was said, and went by without |
|
noticing her. Then followed the Knave of Hearts, carrying the |
|
King's crown on a crimson velvet cushion; and, last of all this |
|
grand procession, came THE KING AND QUEEN OF HEARTS. |
|
|
|
Alice was rather doubtful whether she ought not to lie down on |
|
her face like the three gardeners, but she could not remember |
|
ever having heard of such a rule at processions; `and besides, |
|
what would be the use of a procession,' thought she, `if people |
|
had all to lie down upon their faces, so that they couldn't see it?' |
|
So she stood still where she was, and waited. |
|
|
|
When the procession came opposite to Alice, they all stopped |
|
and looked at her, and the Queen said severely `Who is this?' |
|
She said it to the Knave of Hearts, who only bowed and smiled in reply. |
|
|
|
`Idiot!' said the Queen, tossing her head impatiently; and, |
|
turning to Alice, she went on, `What's your name, child?' |
|
|
|
`My name is Alice, so please your Majesty,' said Alice very |
|
politely; but she added, to herself, `Why, they're only a pack of |
|
cards, after all. I needn't be afraid of them!' |
|
|
|
`And who are THESE?' said the Queen, pointing to the three |
|
gardeners who were lying round the rosetree; for, you see, as |
|
they were lying on their faces, and the pattern on their backs |
|
was the same as the rest of the pack, she could not tell whether |
|
they were gardeners, or soldiers, or courtiers, or three of her |
|
own children. |
|
|
|
`How should I know?' said Alice, surprised at her own courage. |
|
`It's no business of MINE.' |
|
|
|
The Queen turned crimson with fury, and, after glaring at her |
|
for a moment like a wild beast, screamed `Off with her head! |
|
Off--' |
|
|
|
`Nonsense!' said Alice, very loudly and decidedly, and the |
|
Queen was silent. |
|
|
|
The King laid his hand upon her arm, and timidly said |
|
`Consider, my dear: she is only a child!' |
|
|
|
The Queen turned angrily away from him, and said to the Knave |
|
`Turn them over!' |
|
|
|
The Knave did so, very carefully, with one foot. |
|
|
|
`Get up!' said the Queen, in a shrill, loud voice, and the |
|
three gardeners instantly jumped up, and began bowing to the |
|
King, the Queen, the royal children, and everybody else. |
|
|
|
`Leave off that!' screamed the Queen. `You make me giddy.' |
|
And then, turning to the rose-tree, she went on, `What HAVE you |
|
been doing here?' |
|
|
|
`May it please your Majesty,' said Two, in a very humble tone, |
|
going down on one knee as he spoke, `we were trying--' |
|
|
|
`I see!' said the Queen, who had meanwhile been examining the |
|
roses. `Off with their heads!' and the procession moved on, |
|
three of the soldiers remaining behind to execute the unfortunate |
|
gardeners, who ran to Alice for protection. |
|
|
|
`You shan't be beheaded!' said Alice, and she put them into a |
|
large flower-pot that stood near. The three soldiers wandered |
|
about for a minute or two, looking for them, and then quietly |
|
marched off after the others. |
|
|
|
`Are their heads off?' shouted the Queen. |
|
|
|
`Their heads are gone, if it please your Majesty!' the soldiers |
|
shouted in reply. |
|
|
|
`That's right!' shouted the Queen. `Can you play croquet?' |
|
|
|
The soldiers were silent, and looked at Alice, as the question |
|
was evidently meant for her. |
|
|
|
`Yes!' shouted Alice. |
|
|
|
`Come on, then!' roared the Queen, and Alice joined the |
|
procession, wondering very much what would happen next. |
|
|
|
`It's--it's a very fine day!' said a timid voice at her side. |
|
She was walking by the White Rabbit, who was peeping anxiously |
|
into her face. |
|
|
|
`Very,' said Alice: `--where's the Duchess?' |
|
|
|
`Hush! Hush!' said the Rabbit in a low, hurried tone. He |
|
looked anxiously over his shoulder as he spoke, and then raised |
|
himself upon tiptoe, put his mouth close to her ear, and |
|
whispered `She's under sentence of execution.' |
|
|
|
`What for?' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Did you say "What a pity!"?' the Rabbit asked. |
|
|
|
`No, I didn't,' said Alice: `I don't think it's at all a pity. |
|
I said "What for?"' |
|
|
|
`She boxed the Queen's ears--' the Rabbit began. Alice gave a |
|
little scream of laughter. `Oh, hush!' the Rabbit whispered in a |
|
frightened tone. `The Queen will hear you! You see, she came |
|
rather late, and the Queen said--' |
|
|
|
`Get to your places!' shouted the Queen in a voice of thunder, |
|
and people began running about in all directions, tumbling up |
|
against each other; however, they got settled down in a minute or |
|
two, and the game began. Alice thought she had never seen such a |
|
curious croquet-ground in her life; it was all ridges and |
|
furrows; the balls were live hedgehogs, the mallets live |
|
flamingoes, and the soldiers had to double themselves up and to |
|
stand on their hands and feet, to make the arches. |
|
|
|
The chief difficulty Alice found at first was in managing her |
|
flamingo: she succeeded in getting its body tucked away, |
|
comfortably enough, under her arm, with its legs hanging down, |
|
but generally, just as she had got its neck nicely straightened |
|
out, and was going to give the hedgehog a blow with its head, it |
|
WOULD twist itself round and look up in her face, with such a |
|
puzzled expression that she could not help bursting out laughing: |
|
and when she had got its head down, and was going to begin again, |
|
it was very provoking to find that the hedgehog had unrolled |
|
itself, and was in the act of crawling away: besides all this, |
|
there was generally a ridge or furrow in the way wherever she |
|
wanted to send the hedgehog to, and, as the doubled-up soldiers |
|
were always getting up and walking off to other parts of the |
|
ground, Alice soon came to the conclusion that it was a very |
|
difficult game indeed. |
|
|
|
The players all played at once without waiting for turns, |
|
quarrelling all the while, and fighting for the hedgehogs; and in |
|
a very short time the Queen was in a furious passion, and went |
|
stamping about, and shouting `Off with his head!' or `Off with |
|
her head!' about once in a minute. |
|
|
|
Alice began to feel very uneasy: to be sure, she had not as |
|
yet had any dispute with the Queen, but she knew that it might |
|
happen any minute, `and then,' thought she, `what would become of |
|
me? They're dreadfully fond of beheading people here; the great |
|
wonder is, that there's any one left alive!' |
|
|
|
She was looking about for some way of escape, and wondering |
|
whether she could get away without being seen, when she noticed a |
|
curious appearance in the air: it puzzled her very much at |
|
first, but, after watching it a minute or two, she made it out to |
|
be a grin, and she said to herself `It's the Cheshire Cat: now I |
|
shall have somebody to talk to.' |
|
|
|
`How are you getting on?' said the Cat, as soon as there was |
|
mouth enough for it to speak with. |
|
|
|
Alice waited till the eyes appeared, and then nodded. `It's no |
|
use speaking to it,' she thought, `till its ears have come, or at |
|
least one of them.' In another minute the whole head appeared, |
|
and then Alice put down her flamingo, and began an account of the |
|
game, feeling very glad she had someone to listen to her. The |
|
Cat seemed to think that there was enough of it now in sight, and |
|
no more of it appeared. |
|
|
|
`I don't think they play at all fairly,' Alice began, in rather |
|
a complaining tone, `and they all quarrel so dreadfully one can't |
|
hear oneself speak--and they don't seem to have any rules in |
|
particular; at least, if there are, nobody attends to them--and |
|
you've no idea how confusing it is all the things being alive; |
|
for instance, there's the arch I've got to go through next |
|
walking about at the other end of the ground--and I should have |
|
croqueted the Queen's hedgehog just now, only it ran away when it |
|
saw mine coming!' |
|
|
|
`How do you like the Queen?' said the Cat in a low voice. |
|
|
|
`Not at all,' said Alice: `she's so extremely--' Just then |
|
she noticed that the Queen was close behind her, listening: so |
|
she went on, `--likely to win, that it's hardly worth while |
|
finishing the game.' |
|
|
|
The Queen smiled and passed on. |
|
|
|
`Who ARE you talking to?' said the King, going up to Alice, and |
|
looking at the Cat's head with great curiosity. |
|
|
|
`It's a friend of mine--a Cheshire Cat,' said Alice: `allow me |
|
to introduce it.' |
|
|
|
`I don't like the look of it at all,' said the King: |
|
`however, it may kiss my hand if it likes.' |
|
|
|
`I'd rather not,' the Cat remarked. |
|
|
|
`Don't be impertinent,' said the King, `and don't look at me |
|
like that!' He got behind Alice as he spoke. |
|
|
|
`A cat may look at a king,' said Alice. `I've read that in |
|
some book, but I don't remember where.' |
|
|
|
`Well, it must be removed,' said the King very decidedly, and |
|
he called the Queen, who was passing at the moment, `My dear! I |
|
wish you would have this cat removed!' |
|
|
|
The Queen had only one way of settling all difficulties, great |
|
or small. `Off with his head!' she said, without even looking |
|
round. |
|
|
|
`I'll fetch the executioner myself,' said the King eagerly, and |
|
he hurried off. |
|
|
|
Alice thought she might as well go back, and see how the game |
|
was going on, as she heard the Queen's voice in the distance, |
|
screaming with passion. She had already heard her sentence three |
|
of the players to be executed for having missed their turns, and |
|
she did not like the look of things at all, as the game was in |
|
such confusion that she never knew whether it was her turn or |
|
not. So she went in search of her hedgehog. |
|
|
|
The hedgehog was engaged in a fight with another hedgehog, |
|
which seemed to Alice an excellent opportunity for croqueting one |
|
of them with the other: the only difficulty was, that her |
|
flamingo was gone across to the other side of the garden, where |
|
Alice could see it trying in a helpless sort of way to fly up |
|
into a tree. |
|
|
|
By the time she had caught the flamingo and brought it back, |
|
the fight was over, and both the hedgehogs were out of sight: |
|
`but it doesn't matter much,' thought Alice, `as all the arches |
|
are gone from this side of the ground.' So she tucked it away |
|
under her arm, that it might not escape again, and went back for |
|
a little more conversation with her friend. |
|
|
|
When she got back to the Cheshire Cat, she was surprised to |
|
find quite a large crowd collected round it: there was a dispute |
|
going on between the executioner, the King, and the Queen, who |
|
were all talking at once, while all the rest were quite silent, |
|
and looked very uncomfortable. |
|
|
|
The moment Alice appeared, she was appealed to by all three to |
|
settle the question, and they repeated their arguments to her, |
|
though, as they all spoke at once, she found it very hard indeed |
|
to make out exactly what they said. |
|
|
|
The executioner's argument was, that you couldn't cut off a |
|
head unless there was a body to cut it off from: that he had |
|
never had to do such a thing before, and he wasn't going to begin |
|
at HIS time of life. |
|
|
|
The King's argument was, that anything that had a head could be |
|
beheaded, and that you weren't to talk nonsense. |
|
|
|
The Queen's argument was, that if something wasn't done about |
|
it in less than no time she'd have everybody executed, all round. |
|
(It was this last remark that had made the whole party look so |
|
grave and anxious.) |
|
|
|
Alice could think of nothing else to say but `It belongs to the |
|
Duchess: you'd better ask HER about it.' |
|
|
|
`She's in prison,' the Queen said to the executioner: `fetch |
|
her here.' And the executioner went off like an arrow. |
|
|
|
The Cat's head began fading away the moment he was gone, and, |
|
by the time he had come back with the Duchess, it had entirely |
|
disappeared; so the King and the executioner ran wildly up and down |
|
looking for it, while the rest of the party went back to the game. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER IX |
|
|
|
The Mock Turtle's Story |
|
|
|
|
|
`You can't think how glad I am to see you again, you dear old |
|
thing!' said the Duchess, as she tucked her arm affectionately |
|
into Alice's, and they walked off together. |
|
|
|
Alice was very glad to find her in such a pleasant temper, and |
|
thought to herself that perhaps it was only the pepper that had |
|
made her so savage when they met in the kitchen. |
|
|
|
`When I'M a Duchess,' she said to herself, (not in a very |
|
hopeful tone though), `I won't have any pepper in my kitchen AT |
|
ALL. Soup does very well without--Maybe it's always pepper that |
|
makes people hot-tempered,' she went on, very much pleased at |
|
having found out a new kind of rule, `and vinegar that makes them |
|
sour--and camomile that makes them bitter--and--and barley-sugar |
|
and such things that make children sweet-tempered. I only wish |
|
people knew that: then they wouldn't be so stingy about it, you |
|
know--' |
|
|
|
She had quite forgotten the Duchess by this time, and was a |
|
little startled when she heard her voice close to her ear. |
|
`You're thinking about something, my dear, and that makes you |
|
forget to talk. I can't tell you just now what the moral of that |
|
is, but I shall remember it in a bit.' |
|
|
|
`Perhaps it hasn't one,' Alice ventured to remark. |
|
|
|
`Tut, tut, child!' said the Duchess. `Everything's got a |
|
moral, if only you can find it.' And she squeezed herself up |
|
closer to Alice's side as she spoke. |
|
|
|
Alice did not much like keeping so close to her: first, |
|
because the Duchess was VERY ugly; and secondly, because she was |
|
exactly the right height to rest her chin upon Alice's shoulder, |
|
and it was an uncomfortably sharp chin. However, she did not |
|
like to be rude, so she bore it as well as she could. |
|
|
|
`The game's going on rather better now,' she said, by way of |
|
keeping up the conversation a little. |
|
|
|
`'Tis so,' said the Duchess: `and the moral of that is--"Oh, |
|
'tis love, 'tis love, that makes the world go round!"' |
|
|
|
`Somebody said,' Alice whispered, `that it's done by everybody |
|
minding their own business!' |
|
|
|
`Ah, well! It means much the same thing,' said the Duchess, |
|
digging her sharp little chin into Alice's shoulder as she added, |
|
`and the moral of THAT is--"Take care of the sense, and the |
|
sounds will take care of themselves."' |
|
|
|
`How fond she is of finding morals in things!' Alice thought to |
|
herself. |
|
|
|
`I dare say you're wondering why I don't put my arm round your |
|
waist,' the Duchess said after a pause: `the reason is, that I'm |
|
doubtful about the temper of your flamingo. Shall I try the |
|
experiment?' |
|
|
|
`HE might bite,' Alice cautiously replied, not feeling at all |
|
anxious to have the experiment tried. |
|
|
|
`Very true,' said the Duchess: `flamingoes and mustard both |
|
bite. And the moral of that is--"Birds of a feather flock |
|
together."' |
|
|
|
`Only mustard isn't a bird,' Alice remarked. |
|
|
|
`Right, as usual,' said the Duchess: `what a clear way you |
|
have of putting things!' |
|
|
|
`It's a mineral, I THINK,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Of course it is,' said the Duchess, who seemed ready to agree |
|
to everything that Alice said; `there's a large mustard-mine near |
|
here. And the moral of that is--"The more there is of mine, the |
|
less there is of yours."' |
|
|
|
`Oh, I know!' exclaimed Alice, who had not attended to this |
|
last remark, `it's a vegetable. It doesn't look like one, but it |
|
is.' |
|
|
|
`I quite agree with you,' said the Duchess; `and the moral of |
|
that is--"Be what you would seem to be"--or if you'd like it put |
|
more simply--"Never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than |
|
what it might appear to others that what you were or might have |
|
been was not otherwise than what you had been would have appeared |
|
to them to be otherwise."' |
|
|
|
`I think I should understand that better,' Alice said very |
|
politely, `if I had it written down: but I can't quite follow it |
|
as you say it.' |
|
|
|
`That's nothing to what I could say if I chose,' the Duchess |
|
replied, in a pleased tone. |
|
|
|
`Pray don't trouble yourself to say it any longer than that,' |
|
said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Oh, don't talk about trouble!' said the Duchess. `I make you |
|
a present of everything I've said as yet.' |
|
|
|
`A cheap sort of present!' thought Alice. `I'm glad they don't |
|
give birthday presents like that!' But she did not venture to |
|
say it out loud. |
|
|
|
`Thinking again?' the Duchess asked, with another dig of her |
|
sharp little chin. |
|
|
|
`I've a right to think,' said Alice sharply, for she was |
|
beginning to feel a little worried. |
|
|
|
`Just about as much right,' said the Duchess, `as pigs have to fly; |
|
and the m--' |
|
|
|
But here, to Alice's great surprise, the Duchess's voice died |
|
away, even in the middle of her favourite word `moral,' and the |
|
arm that was linked into hers began to tremble. Alice looked up, |
|
and there stood the Queen in front of them, with her arms folded, |
|
frowning like a thunderstorm. |
|
|
|
`A fine day, your Majesty!' the Duchess began in a low, weak |
|
voice. |
|
|
|
`Now, I give you fair warning,' shouted the Queen, stamping on |
|
the ground as she spoke; `either you or your head must be off, |
|
and that in about half no time! Take your choice!' |
|
|
|
The Duchess took her choice, and was gone in a moment. |
|
|
|
`Let's go on with the game,' the Queen said to Alice; and Alice |
|
was too much frightened to say a word, but slowly followed her |
|
back to the croquet-ground. |
|
|
|
The other guests had taken advantage of the Queen's absence, |
|
and were resting in the shade: however, the moment they saw her, |
|
they hurried back to the game, the Queen merely remarking that a |
|
moment's delay would cost them their lives. |
|
|
|
All the time they were playing the Queen never left off |
|
quarrelling with the other players, and shouting `Off with his |
|
head!' or `Off with her head!' Those whom she sentenced were |
|
taken into custody by the soldiers, who of course had to leave |
|
off being arches to do this, so that by the end of half an hour |
|
or so there were no arches left, and all the players, except the |
|
King, the Queen, and Alice, were in custody and under sentence of |
|
execution. |
|
|
|
Then the Queen left off, quite out of breath, and said to |
|
Alice, `Have you seen the Mock Turtle yet?' |
|
|
|
`No,' said Alice. `I don't even know what a Mock Turtle is.' |
|
|
|
`It's the thing Mock Turtle Soup is made from,' said the Queen. |
|
|
|
`I never saw one, or heard of one,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Come on, then,' said the Queen, `and he shall tell you his |
|
history,' |
|
|
|
As they walked off together, Alice heard the King say in a low |
|
voice, to the company generally, `You are all pardoned.' `Come, |
|
THAT'S a good thing!' she said to herself, for she had felt quite |
|
unhappy at the number of executions the Queen had ordered. |
|
|
|
They very soon came upon a Gryphon, lying fast asleep in the |
|
sun. (IF you don't know what a Gryphon is, look at the picture.) |
|
`Up, lazy thing!' said the Queen, `and take this young lady to |
|
see the Mock Turtle, and to hear his history. I must go back and |
|
see after some executions I have ordered'; and she walked off, |
|
leaving Alice alone with the Gryphon. Alice did not quite like |
|
the look of the creature, but on the whole she thought it would |
|
be quite as safe to stay with it as to go after that savage |
|
Queen: so she waited. |
|
|
|
The Gryphon sat up and rubbed its eyes: then it watched the |
|
Queen till she was out of sight: then it chuckled. `What fun!' |
|
said the Gryphon, half to itself, half to Alice. |
|
|
|
`What IS the fun?' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Why, SHE,' said the Gryphon. `It's all her fancy, that: they |
|
never executes nobody, you know. Come on!' |
|
|
|
`Everybody says "come on!" here,' thought Alice, as she went |
|
slowly after it: `I never was so ordered about in all my life, |
|
never!' |
|
|
|
They had not gone far before they saw the Mock Turtle in the |
|
distance, sitting sad and lonely on a little ledge of rock, and, |
|
as they came nearer, Alice could hear him sighing as if his heart |
|
would break. She pitied him deeply. `What is his sorrow?' she |
|
asked the Gryphon, and the Gryphon answered, very nearly in the |
|
same words as before, `It's all his fancy, that: he hasn't got |
|
no sorrow, you know. Come on!' |
|
|
|
So they went up to the Mock Turtle, who looked at them with |
|
large eyes full of tears, but said nothing. |
|
|
|
`This here young lady,' said the Gryphon, `she wants for to |
|
know your history, she do.' |
|
|
|
`I'll tell it her,' said the Mock Turtle in a deep, hollow |
|
tone: `sit down, both of you, and don't speak a word till I've |
|
finished.' |
|
|
|
So they sat down, and nobody spoke for some minutes. Alice |
|
thought to herself, `I don't see how he can EVEN finish, if he |
|
doesn't begin.' But she waited patiently. |
|
|
|
`Once,' said the Mock Turtle at last, with a deep sigh, `I was |
|
a real Turtle.' |
|
|
|
These words were followed by a very long silence, broken only |
|
by an occasional exclamation of `Hjckrrh!' from the Gryphon, and |
|
the constant heavy sobbing of the Mock Turtle. Alice was very |
|
nearly getting up and saying, `Thank you, sir, for your |
|
interesting story,' but she could not help thinking there MUST be |
|
more to come, so she sat still and said nothing. |
|
|
|
`When we were little,' the Mock Turtle went on at last, more |
|
calmly, though still sobbing a little now and then, `we went to |
|
school in the sea. The master was an old Turtle--we used to call |
|
him Tortoise--' |
|
|
|
`Why did you call him Tortoise, if he wasn't one?' Alice asked. |
|
|
|
`We called him Tortoise because he taught us,' said the Mock |
|
Turtle angrily: `really you are very dull!' |
|
|
|
`You ought to be ashamed of yourself for asking such a simple |
|
question,' added the Gryphon; and then they both sat silent and |
|
looked at poor Alice, who felt ready to sink into the earth. At |
|
last the Gryphon said to the Mock Turtle, `Drive on, old fellow! |
|
Don't be all day about it!' and he went on in these words: |
|
|
|
`Yes, we went to school in the sea, though you mayn't believe |
|
it--' |
|
|
|
`I never said I didn't!' interrupted Alice. |
|
|
|
`You did,' said the Mock Turtle. |
|
|
|
`Hold your tongue!' added the Gryphon, before Alice could speak |
|
again. The Mock Turtle went on. |
|
|
|
`We had the best of educations--in fact, we went to school |
|
every day--' |
|
|
|
`I'VE been to a day-school, too,' said Alice; `you needn't be |
|
so proud as all that.' |
|
|
|
`With extras?' asked the Mock Turtle a little anxiously. |
|
|
|
`Yes,' said Alice, `we learned French and music.' |
|
|
|
`And washing?' said the Mock Turtle. |
|
|
|
`Certainly not!' said Alice indignantly. |
|
|
|
`Ah! then yours wasn't a really good school,' said the Mock |
|
Turtle in a tone of great relief. `Now at OURS they had at the |
|
end of the bill, "French, music, AND WASHING--extra."' |
|
|
|
`You couldn't have wanted it much,' said Alice; `living at the |
|
bottom of the sea.' |
|
|
|
`I couldn't afford to learn it.' said the Mock Turtle with a |
|
sigh. `I only took the regular course.' |
|
|
|
`What was that?' inquired Alice. |
|
|
|
`Reeling and Writhing, of course, to begin with,' the Mock |
|
Turtle replied; `and then the different branches of Arithmetic-- |
|
Ambition, Distraction, Uglification, and Derision.' |
|
|
|
`I never heard of "Uglification,"' Alice ventured to say. `What is it?' |
|
|
|
The Gryphon lifted up both its paws in surprise. `What! Never |
|
heard of uglifying!' it exclaimed. `You know what to beautify is, |
|
I suppose?' |
|
|
|
`Yes,' said Alice doubtfully: `it means--to--make--anything--prettier.' |
|
|
|
`Well, then,' the Gryphon went on, `if you don't know what to |
|
uglify is, you ARE a simpleton.' |
|
|
|
Alice did not feel encouraged to ask any more questions about |
|
it, so she turned to the Mock Turtle, and said `What else had you |
|
to learn?' |
|
|
|
`Well, there was Mystery,' the Mock Turtle replied, counting |
|
off the subjects on his flappers, `--Mystery, ancient and modern, |
|
with Seaography: then Drawling--the Drawling-master was an old |
|
conger-eel, that used to come once a week: HE taught us |
|
Drawling, Stretching, and Fainting in Coils.' |
|
|
|
`What was THAT like?' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Well, I can't show it you myself,' the Mock Turtle said: `I'm |
|
too stiff. And the Gryphon never learnt it.' |
|
|
|
`Hadn't time,' said the Gryphon: `I went to the Classics |
|
master, though. He was an old crab, HE was.' |
|
|
|
`I never went to him,' the Mock Turtle said with a sigh: `he |
|
taught Laughing and Grief, they used to say.' |
|
|
|
`So he did, so he did,' said the Gryphon, sighing in his turn; |
|
and both creatures hid their faces in their paws. |
|
|
|
`And how many hours a day did you do lessons?' said Alice, in a |
|
hurry to change the subject. |
|
|
|
`Ten hours the first day,' said the Mock Turtle: `nine the |
|
next, and so on.' |
|
|
|
`What a curious plan!' exclaimed Alice. |
|
|
|
`That's the reason they're called lessons,' the Gryphon |
|
remarked: `because they lessen from day to day.' |
|
|
|
This was quite a new idea to Alice, and she thought it over a |
|
little before she made her next remark. `Then the eleventh day |
|
must have been a holiday?' |
|
|
|
`Of course it was,' said the Mock Turtle. |
|
|
|
`And how did you manage on the twelfth?' Alice went on eagerly. |
|
|
|
`That's enough about lessons,' the Gryphon interrupted in a |
|
very decided tone: `tell her something about the games now.' |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER X |
|
|
|
The Lobster Quadrille |
|
|
|
|
|
The Mock Turtle sighed deeply, and drew the back of one flapper |
|
across his eyes. He looked at Alice, and tried to speak, but for |
|
a minute or two sobs choked his voice. `Same as if he had a bone |
|
in his throat,' said the Gryphon: and it set to work shaking him |
|
and punching him in the back. At last the Mock Turtle recovered |
|
his voice, and, with tears running down his cheeks, he went on |
|
again:-- |
|
|
|
`You may not have lived much under the sea--' (`I haven't,' said Alice)-- |
|
`and perhaps you were never even introduced to a lobster--' |
|
(Alice began to say `I once tasted--' but checked herself hastily, |
|
and said `No, never') `--so you can have no idea what a delightful |
|
thing a Lobster Quadrille is!' |
|
|
|
`No, indeed,' said Alice. `What sort of a dance is it?' |
|
|
|
`Why,' said the Gryphon, `you first form into a line along the sea-shore--' |
|
|
|
`Two lines!' cried the Mock Turtle. `Seals, turtles, salmon, and so on; |
|
then, when you've cleared all the jelly-fish out of the way--' |
|
|
|
`THAT generally takes some time,' interrupted the Gryphon. |
|
|
|
`--you advance twice--' |
|
|
|
`Each with a lobster as a partner!' cried the Gryphon. |
|
|
|
`Of course,' the Mock Turtle said: `advance twice, set to |
|
partners--' |
|
|
|
`--change lobsters, and retire in same order,' continued the |
|
Gryphon. |
|
|
|
`Then, you know,' the Mock Turtle went on, `you throw the--' |
|
|
|
`The lobsters!' shouted the Gryphon, with a bound into the air. |
|
|
|
`--as far out to sea as you can--' |
|
|
|
`Swim after them!' screamed the Gryphon. |
|
|
|
`Turn a somersault in the sea!' cried the Mock Turtle, |
|
capering wildly about. |
|
|
|
`Change lobsters again!' yelled the Gryphon at the top of its voice. |
|
|
|
`Back to land again, and that's all the first figure,' said the |
|
Mock Turtle, suddenly dropping his voice; and the two creatures, |
|
who had been jumping about like mad things all this time, sat |
|
down again very sadly and quietly, and looked at Alice. |
|
|
|
`It must be a very pretty dance,' said Alice timidly. |
|
|
|
`Would you like to see a little of it?' said the Mock Turtle. |
|
|
|
`Very much indeed,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Come, let's try the first figure!' said the Mock Turtle to the |
|
Gryphon. `We can do without lobsters, you know. Which shall |
|
sing?' |
|
|
|
`Oh, YOU sing,' said the Gryphon. `I've forgotten the words.' |
|
|
|
So they began solemnly dancing round and round Alice, every now |
|
and then treading on her toes when they passed too close, and |
|
waving their forepaws to mark the time, while the Mock Turtle |
|
sang this, very slowly and sadly:-- |
|
|
|
|
|
`"Will you walk a little faster?" said a whiting to a snail. |
|
"There's a porpoise close behind us, and he's treading on my |
|
tail. |
|
See how eagerly the lobsters and the turtles all advance! |
|
They are waiting on the shingle--will you come and join the |
|
dance? |
|
|
|
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, will you join the |
|
dance? |
|
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join the |
|
dance? |
|
|
|
|
|
"You can really have no notion how delightful it will be |
|
When they take us up and throw us, with the lobsters, out to |
|
sea!" |
|
But the snail replied "Too far, too far!" and gave a look |
|
askance-- |
|
Said he thanked the whiting kindly, but he would not join the |
|
dance. |
|
Would not, could not, would not, could not, would not join |
|
the dance. |
|
Would not, could not, would not, could not, could not join |
|
the dance. |
|
|
|
`"What matters it how far we go?" his scaly friend replied. |
|
"There is another shore, you know, upon the other side. |
|
The further off from England the nearer is to France-- |
|
Then turn not pale, beloved snail, but come and join the dance. |
|
|
|
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, will you join the |
|
dance? |
|
Will you, won't you, will you, won't you, won't you join the |
|
dance?"' |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
`Thank you, it's a very interesting dance to watch,' said |
|
Alice, feeling very glad that it was over at last: `and I do so |
|
like that curious song about the whiting!' |
|
|
|
`Oh, as to the whiting,' said the Mock Turtle, `they--you've |
|
seen them, of course?' |
|
|
|
`Yes,' said Alice, `I've often seen them at dinn--' she |
|
checked herself hastily. |
|
|
|
`I don't know where Dinn may be,' said the Mock Turtle, `but |
|
if you've seen them so often, of course you know what they're |
|
like.' |
|
|
|
`I believe so,' Alice replied thoughtfully. `They have their |
|
tails in their mouths--and they're all over crumbs.' |
|
|
|
`You're wrong about the crumbs,' said the Mock Turtle: |
|
`crumbs would all wash off in the sea. But they HAVE their tails |
|
in their mouths; and the reason is--' here the Mock Turtle |
|
yawned and shut his eyes.--`Tell her about the reason and all |
|
that,' he said to the Gryphon. |
|
|
|
`The reason is,' said the Gryphon, `that they WOULD go with |
|
the lobsters to the dance. So they got thrown out to sea. So |
|
they had to fall a long way. So they got their tails fast in |
|
their mouths. So they couldn't get them out again. That's all.' |
|
|
|
`Thank you,' said Alice, `it's very interesting. I never knew |
|
so much about a whiting before.' |
|
|
|
`I can tell you more than that, if you like,' said the |
|
Gryphon. `Do you know why it's called a whiting?' |
|
|
|
`I never thought about it,' said Alice. `Why?' |
|
|
|
`IT DOES THE BOOTS AND SHOES.' the Gryphon replied very |
|
solemnly. |
|
|
|
Alice was thoroughly puzzled. `Does the boots and shoes!' she |
|
repeated in a wondering tone. |
|
|
|
`Why, what are YOUR shoes done with?' said the Gryphon. `I |
|
mean, what makes them so shiny?' |
|
|
|
Alice looked down at them, and considered a little before she |
|
gave her answer. `They're done with blacking, I believe.' |
|
|
|
`Boots and shoes under the sea,' the Gryphon went on in a deep |
|
voice, `are done with a whiting. Now you know.' |
|
|
|
`And what are they made of?' Alice asked in a tone of great |
|
curiosity. |
|
|
|
`Soles and eels, of course,' the Gryphon replied rather |
|
impatiently: `any shrimp could have told you that.' |
|
|
|
`If I'd been the whiting,' said Alice, whose thoughts were |
|
still running on the song, `I'd have said to the porpoise, "Keep |
|
back, please: we don't want YOU with us!"' |
|
|
|
`They were obliged to have him with them,' the Mock Turtle |
|
said: `no wise fish would go anywhere without a porpoise.' |
|
|
|
`Wouldn't it really?' said Alice in a tone of great surprise. |
|
|
|
`Of course not,' said the Mock Turtle: `why, if a fish came |
|
to ME, and told me he was going a journey, I should say "With |
|
what porpoise?"' |
|
|
|
`Don't you mean "purpose"?' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`I mean what I say,' the Mock Turtle replied in an offended |
|
tone. And the Gryphon added `Come, let's hear some of YOUR |
|
adventures.' |
|
|
|
`I could tell you my adventures--beginning from this morning,' |
|
said Alice a little timidly: `but it's no use going back to |
|
yesterday, because I was a different person then.' |
|
|
|
`Explain all that,' said the Mock Turtle. |
|
|
|
`No, no! The adventures first,' said the Gryphon in an |
|
impatient tone: `explanations take such a dreadful time.' |
|
|
|
So Alice began telling them her adventures from the time when |
|
she first saw the White Rabbit. She was a little nervous about |
|
it just at first, the two creatures got so close to her, one on |
|
each side, and opened their eyes and mouths so VERY wide, but she |
|
gained courage as she went on. Her listeners were perfectly |
|
quiet till she got to the part about her repeating `YOU ARE OLD, |
|
FATHER WILLIAM,' to the Caterpillar, and the words all coming |
|
different, and then the Mock Turtle drew a long breath, and said |
|
`That's very curious.' |
|
|
|
`It's all about as curious as it can be,' said the Gryphon. |
|
|
|
`It all came different!' the Mock Turtle repeated |
|
thoughtfully. `I should like to hear her try and repeat |
|
something now. Tell her to begin.' He looked at the Gryphon as |
|
if he thought it had some kind of authority over Alice. |
|
|
|
`Stand up and repeat "'TIS THE VOICE OF THE SLUGGARD,"' said |
|
the Gryphon. |
|
|
|
`How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat |
|
lessons!' thought Alice; `I might as well be at school at once.' |
|
However, she got up, and began to repeat it, but her head was so |
|
full of the Lobster Quadrille, that she hardly knew what she was |
|
saying, and the words came very queer indeed:-- |
|
|
|
`'Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare, |
|
"You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair." |
|
As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose |
|
Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.' |
|
|
|
[later editions continued as follows |
|
When the sands are all dry, he is gay as a lark, |
|
And will talk in contemptuous tones of the Shark, |
|
But, when the tide rises and sharks are around, |
|
His voice has a timid and tremulous sound.] |
|
|
|
`That's different from what I used to say when I was a child,' |
|
said the Gryphon. |
|
|
|
`Well, I never heard it before,' said the Mock Turtle; `but it |
|
sounds uncommon nonsense.' |
|
|
|
Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her |
|
hands, wondering if anything would EVER happen in a natural way |
|
again. |
|
|
|
`I should like to have it explained,' said the Mock Turtle. |
|
|
|
`She can't explain it,' said the Gryphon hastily. `Go on with |
|
the next verse.' |
|
|
|
`But about his toes?' the Mock Turtle persisted. `How COULD |
|
he turn them out with his nose, you know?' |
|
|
|
`It's the first position in dancing.' Alice said; but was |
|
dreadfully puzzled by the whole thing, and longed to change the |
|
subject. |
|
|
|
`Go on with the next verse,' the Gryphon repeated impatiently: |
|
`it begins "I passed by his garden."' |
|
|
|
Alice did not dare to disobey, though she felt sure it would |
|
all come wrong, and she went on in a trembling voice:-- |
|
|
|
`I passed by his garden, and marked, with one eye, |
|
How the Owl and the Panther were sharing a pie--' |
|
|
|
[later editions continued as follows |
|
The Panther took pie-crust, and gravy, and meat, |
|
While the Owl had the dish as its share of the treat. |
|
When the pie was all finished, the Owl, as a boon, |
|
Was kindly permitted to pocket the spoon: |
|
While the Panther received knife and fork with a growl, |
|
And concluded the banquet--] |
|
|
|
`What IS the use of repeating all that stuff,' the Mock Turtle |
|
interrupted, `if you don't explain it as you go on? It's by far |
|
the most confusing thing I ever heard!' |
|
|
|
`Yes, I think you'd better leave off,' said the Gryphon: and |
|
Alice was only too glad to do so. |
|
|
|
`Shall we try another figure of the Lobster Quadrille?' the |
|
Gryphon went on. `Or would you like the Mock Turtle to sing you |
|
a song?' |
|
|
|
`Oh, a song, please, if the Mock Turtle would be so kind,' |
|
Alice replied, so eagerly that the Gryphon said, in a rather |
|
offended tone, `Hm! No accounting for tastes! Sing her |
|
"Turtle Soup," will you, old fellow?' |
|
|
|
The Mock Turtle sighed deeply, and began, in a voice sometimes |
|
choked with sobs, to sing this:-- |
|
|
|
|
|
`Beautiful Soup, so rich and green, |
|
Waiting in a hot tureen! |
|
Who for such dainties would not stoop? |
|
Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup! |
|
Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup! |
|
Beau--ootiful Soo--oop! |
|
Beau--ootiful Soo--oop! |
|
Soo--oop of the e--e--evening, |
|
Beautiful, beautiful Soup! |
|
|
|
`Beautiful Soup! Who cares for fish, |
|
Game, or any other dish? |
|
Who would not give all else for two |
|
Pennyworth only of beautiful Soup? |
|
Pennyworth only of beautiful Soup? |
|
Beau--ootiful Soo--oop! |
|
Beau--ootiful Soo--oop! |
|
Soo--oop of the e--e--evening, |
|
Beautiful, beauti--FUL SOUP!' |
|
|
|
`Chorus again!' cried the Gryphon, and the Mock Turtle had |
|
just begun to repeat it, when a cry of `The trial's beginning!' |
|
was heard in the distance. |
|
|
|
`Come on!' cried the Gryphon, and, taking Alice by the hand, |
|
it hurried off, without waiting for the end of the song. |
|
|
|
`What trial is it?' Alice panted as she ran; but the Gryphon |
|
only answered `Come on!' and ran the faster, while more and more |
|
faintly came, carried on the breeze that followed them, the |
|
melancholy words:-- |
|
|
|
`Soo--oop of the e--e--evening, |
|
Beautiful, beautiful Soup!' |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER XI |
|
|
|
Who Stole the Tarts? |
|
|
|
|
|
The King and Queen of Hearts were seated on their throne when |
|
they arrived, with a great crowd assembled about them--all sorts |
|
of little birds and beasts, as well as the whole pack of cards: |
|
the Knave was standing before them, in chains, with a soldier on |
|
each side to guard him; and near the King was the White Rabbit, |
|
with a trumpet in one hand, and a scroll of parchment in the |
|
other. In the very middle of the court was a table, with a large |
|
dish of tarts upon it: they looked so good, that it made Alice |
|
quite hungry to look at them--`I wish they'd get the trial done,' |
|
she thought, `and hand round the refreshments!' But there seemed |
|
to be no chance of this, so she began looking at everything about |
|
her, to pass away the time. |
|
|
|
Alice had never been in a court of justice before, but she had |
|
read about them in books, and she was quite pleased to find that |
|
she knew the name of nearly everything there. `That's the |
|
judge,' she said to herself, `because of his great wig.' |
|
|
|
The judge, by the way, was the King; and as he wore his crown |
|
over the wig, (look at the frontispiece if you want to see how he |
|
did it,) he did not look at all comfortable, and it was certainly |
|
not becoming. |
|
|
|
`And that's the jury-box,' thought Alice, `and those twelve |
|
creatures,' (she was obliged to say `creatures,' you see, because |
|
some of them were animals, and some were birds,) `I suppose they |
|
are the jurors.' She said this last word two or three times over |
|
to herself, being rather proud of it: for she thought, and |
|
rightly too, that very few little girls of her age knew the |
|
meaning of it at all. However, `jury-men' would have done just |
|
as well. |
|
|
|
The twelve jurors were all writing very busily on slates. |
|
`What are they doing?' Alice whispered to the Gryphon. `They |
|
can't have anything to put down yet, before the trial's begun.' |
|
|
|
`They're putting down their names,' the Gryphon whispered in |
|
reply, `for fear they should forget them before the end of the |
|
trial.' |
|
|
|
`Stupid things!' Alice began in a loud, indignant voice, but |
|
she stopped hastily, for the White Rabbit cried out, `Silence in |
|
the court!' and the King put on his spectacles and looked |
|
anxiously round, to make out who was talking. |
|
|
|
Alice could see, as well as if she were looking over their |
|
shoulders, that all the jurors were writing down `stupid things!' |
|
on their slates, and she could even make out that one of them |
|
didn't know how to spell `stupid,' and that he had to ask his |
|
neighbour to tell him. `A nice muddle their slates'll be in |
|
before the trial's over!' thought Alice. |
|
|
|
One of the jurors had a pencil that squeaked. This of course, |
|
Alice could not stand, and she went round the court and got |
|
behind him, and very soon found an opportunity of taking it |
|
away. She did it so quickly that the poor little juror (it was |
|
Bill, the Lizard) could not make out at all what had become of |
|
it; so, after hunting all about for it, he was obliged to write |
|
with one finger for the rest of the day; and this was of very |
|
little use, as it left no mark on the slate. |
|
|
|
`Herald, read the accusation!' said the King. |
|
|
|
On this the White Rabbit blew three blasts on the trumpet, and |
|
then unrolled the parchment scroll, and read as follows:-- |
|
|
|
`The Queen of Hearts, she made some tarts, |
|
All on a summer day: |
|
The Knave of Hearts, he stole those tarts, |
|
And took them quite away!' |
|
|
|
`Consider your verdict,' the King said to the jury. |
|
|
|
`Not yet, not yet!' the Rabbit hastily interrupted. `There's |
|
a great deal to come before that!' |
|
|
|
`Call the first witness,' said the King; and the White Rabbit |
|
blew three blasts on the trumpet, and called out, `First |
|
witness!' |
|
|
|
The first witness was the Hatter. He came in with a teacup in |
|
one hand and a piece of bread-and-butter in the other. `I beg |
|
pardon, your Majesty,' he began, `for bringing these in: but I |
|
hadn't quite finished my tea when I was sent for.' |
|
|
|
`You ought to have finished,' said the King. `When did you |
|
begin?' |
|
|
|
The Hatter looked at the March Hare, who had followed him into |
|
the court, arm-in-arm with the Dormouse. `Fourteenth of March, I |
|
think it was,' he said. |
|
|
|
`Fifteenth,' said the March Hare. |
|
|
|
`Sixteenth,' added the Dormouse. |
|
|
|
`Write that down,' the King said to the jury, and the jury |
|
eagerly wrote down all three dates on their slates, and then |
|
added them up, and reduced the answer to shillings and pence. |
|
|
|
`Take off your hat,' the King said to the Hatter. |
|
|
|
`It isn't mine,' said the Hatter. |
|
|
|
`Stolen!' the King exclaimed, turning to the jury, who |
|
instantly made a memorandum of the fact. |
|
|
|
`I keep them to sell,' the Hatter added as an explanation; |
|
`I've none of my own. I'm a hatter.' |
|
|
|
Here the Queen put on her spectacles, and began staring at the |
|
Hatter, who turned pale and fidgeted. |
|
|
|
`Give your evidence,' said the King; `and don't be nervous, or |
|
I'll have you executed on the spot.' |
|
|
|
This did not seem to encourage the witness at all: he kept |
|
shifting from one foot to the other, looking uneasily at the |
|
Queen, and in his confusion he bit a large piece out of his |
|
teacup instead of the bread-and-butter. |
|
|
|
Just at this moment Alice felt a very curious sensation, which |
|
puzzled her a good deal until she made out what it was: she was |
|
beginning to grow larger again, and she thought at first she |
|
would get up and leave the court; but on second thoughts she |
|
decided to remain where she was as long as there was room for |
|
her. |
|
|
|
`I wish you wouldn't squeeze so.' said the Dormouse, who was |
|
sitting next to her. `I can hardly breathe.' |
|
|
|
`I can't help it,' said Alice very meekly: `I'm growing.' |
|
|
|
`You've no right to grow here,' said the Dormouse. |
|
|
|
`Don't talk nonsense,' said Alice more boldly: `you know |
|
you're growing too.' |
|
|
|
`Yes, but I grow at a reasonable pace,' said the Dormouse: |
|
`not in that ridiculous fashion.' And he got up very sulkily |
|
and crossed over to the other side of the court. |
|
|
|
All this time the Queen had never left off staring at the |
|
Hatter, and, just as the Dormouse crossed the court, she said to |
|
one of the officers of the court, `Bring me the list of the |
|
singers in the last concert!' on which the wretched Hatter |
|
trembled so, that he shook both his shoes off. |
|
|
|
`Give your evidence,' the King repeated angrily, `or I'll have |
|
you executed, whether you're nervous or not.' |
|
|
|
`I'm a poor man, your Majesty,' the Hatter began, in a |
|
trembling voice, `--and I hadn't begun my tea--not above a week |
|
or so--and what with the bread-and-butter getting so thin--and |
|
the twinkling of the tea--' |
|
|
|
`The twinkling of the what?' said the King. |
|
|
|
`It began with the tea,' the Hatter replied. |
|
|
|
`Of course twinkling begins with a T!' said the King sharply. |
|
`Do you take me for a dunce? Go on!' |
|
|
|
`I'm a poor man,' the Hatter went on, `and most things |
|
twinkled after that--only the March Hare said--' |
|
|
|
`I didn't!' the March Hare interrupted in a great hurry. |
|
|
|
`You did!' said the Hatter. |
|
|
|
`I deny it!' said the March Hare. |
|
|
|
`He denies it,' said the King: `leave out that part.' |
|
|
|
`Well, at any rate, the Dormouse said--' the Hatter went on, |
|
looking anxiously round to see if he would deny it too: but the |
|
Dormouse denied nothing, being fast asleep. |
|
|
|
`After that,' continued the Hatter, `I cut some more bread- |
|
and-butter--' |
|
|
|
`But what did the Dormouse say?' one of the jury asked. |
|
|
|
`That I can't remember,' said the Hatter. |
|
|
|
`You MUST remember,' remarked the King, `or I'll have you |
|
executed.' |
|
|
|
The miserable Hatter dropped his teacup and bread-and-butter, |
|
and went down on one knee. `I'm a poor man, your Majesty,' he |
|
began. |
|
|
|
`You're a very poor speaker,' said the King. |
|
|
|
Here one of the guinea-pigs cheered, and was immediately |
|
suppressed by the officers of the court. (As that is rather a |
|
hard word, I will just explain to you how it was done. They had |
|
a large canvas bag, which tied up at the mouth with strings: |
|
into this they slipped the guinea-pig, head first, and then sat |
|
upon it.) |
|
|
|
`I'm glad I've seen that done,' thought Alice. `I've so often |
|
read in the newspapers, at the end of trials, "There was some |
|
attempts at applause, which was immediately suppressed by the |
|
officers of the court," and I never understood what it meant |
|
till now.' |
|
|
|
`If that's all you know about it, you may stand down,' |
|
continued the King. |
|
|
|
`I can't go no lower,' said the Hatter: `I'm on the floor, as |
|
it is.' |
|
|
|
`Then you may SIT down,' the King replied. |
|
|
|
Here the other guinea-pig cheered, and was suppressed. |
|
|
|
`Come, that finished the guinea-pigs!' thought Alice. `Now we |
|
shall get on better.' |
|
|
|
`I'd rather finish my tea,' said the Hatter, with an anxious |
|
look at the Queen, who was reading the list of singers. |
|
|
|
`You may go,' said the King, and the Hatter hurriedly left the |
|
court, without even waiting to put his shoes on. |
|
|
|
`--and just take his head off outside,' the Queen added to one |
|
of the officers: but the Hatter was out of sight before the |
|
officer could get to the door. |
|
|
|
`Call the next witness!' said the King. |
|
|
|
The next witness was the Duchess's cook. She carried the |
|
pepper-box in her hand, and Alice guessed who it was, even before |
|
she got into the court, by the way the people near the door began |
|
sneezing all at once. |
|
|
|
`Give your evidence,' said the King. |
|
|
|
`Shan't,' said the cook. |
|
|
|
The King looked anxiously at the White Rabbit, who said in a |
|
low voice, `Your Majesty must cross-examine THIS witness.' |
|
|
|
`Well, if I must, I must,' the King said, with a melancholy |
|
air, and, after folding his arms and frowning at the cook till |
|
his eyes were nearly out of sight, he said in a deep voice, `What |
|
are tarts made of?' |
|
|
|
`Pepper, mostly,' said the cook. |
|
|
|
`Treacle,' said a sleepy voice behind her. |
|
|
|
`Collar that Dormouse,' the Queen shrieked out. `Behead that |
|
Dormouse! Turn that Dormouse out of court! Suppress him! Pinch |
|
him! Off with his whiskers!' |
|
|
|
For some minutes the whole court was in confusion, getting the |
|
Dormouse turned out, and, by the time they had settled down |
|
again, the cook had disappeared. |
|
|
|
`Never mind!' said the King, with an air of great relief. |
|
`Call the next witness.' And he added in an undertone to the |
|
Queen, `Really, my dear, YOU must cross-examine the next witness. |
|
It quite makes my forehead ache!' |
|
|
|
Alice watched the White Rabbit as he fumbled over the list, |
|
feeling very curious to see what the next witness would be like, |
|
`--for they haven't got much evidence YET,' she said to herself. |
|
Imagine her surprise, when the White Rabbit read out, at the top |
|
of his shrill little voice, the name `Alice!' |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
CHAPTER XII |
|
|
|
Alice's Evidence |
|
|
|
|
|
`Here!' cried Alice, quite forgetting in the flurry of the |
|
moment how large she had grown in the last few minutes, and she |
|
jumped up in such a hurry that she tipped over the jury-box with |
|
the edge of her skirt, upsetting all the jurymen on to the heads |
|
of the crowd below, and there they lay sprawling about, reminding |
|
her very much of a globe of goldfish she had accidentally upset |
|
the week before. |
|
|
|
`Oh, I BEG your pardon!' she exclaimed in a tone of great |
|
dismay, and began picking them up again as quickly as she could, |
|
for the accident of the goldfish kept running in her head, and |
|
she had a vague sort of idea that they must be collected at once |
|
and put back into the jury-box, or they would die. |
|
|
|
`The trial cannot proceed,' said the King in a very grave |
|
voice, `until all the jurymen are back in their proper places-- |
|
ALL,' he repeated with great emphasis, looking hard at Alice as |
|
he said do. |
|
|
|
Alice looked at the jury-box, and saw that, in her haste, she |
|
had put the Lizard in head downwards, and the poor little thing |
|
was waving its tail about in a melancholy way, being quite unable |
|
to move. She soon got it out again, and put it right; `not that |
|
it signifies much,' she said to herself; `I should think it |
|
would be QUITE as much use in the trial one way up as the other.' |
|
|
|
As soon as the jury had a little recovered from the shock of |
|
being upset, and their slates and pencils had been found and |
|
handed back to them, they set to work very diligently to write |
|
out a history of the accident, all except the Lizard, who seemed |
|
too much overcome to do anything but sit with its mouth open, |
|
gazing up into the roof of the court. |
|
|
|
`What do you know about this business?' the King said to |
|
Alice. |
|
|
|
`Nothing,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Nothing WHATEVER?' persisted the King. |
|
|
|
`Nothing whatever,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`That's very important,' the King said, turning to the jury. |
|
They were just beginning to write this down on their slates, when |
|
the White Rabbit interrupted: `UNimportant, your Majesty means, |
|
of course,' he said in a very respectful tone, but frowning and |
|
making faces at him as he spoke. |
|
|
|
`UNimportant, of course, I meant,' the King hastily said, and |
|
went on to himself in an undertone, `important--unimportant-- |
|
unimportant--important--' as if he were trying which word |
|
sounded best. |
|
|
|
Some of the jury wrote it down `important,' and some |
|
`unimportant.' Alice could see this, as she was near enough to |
|
look over their slates; `but it doesn't matter a bit,' she |
|
thought to herself. |
|
|
|
At this moment the King, who had been for some time busily |
|
writing in his note-book, cackled out `Silence!' and read out |
|
from his book, `Rule Forty-two. ALL PERSONS MORE THAN A MILE |
|
HIGH TO LEAVE THE COURT.' |
|
|
|
Everybody looked at Alice. |
|
|
|
`I'M not a mile high,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`You are,' said the King. |
|
|
|
`Nearly two miles high,' added the Queen. |
|
|
|
`Well, I shan't go, at any rate,' said Alice: `besides, |
|
that's not a regular rule: you invented it just now.' |
|
|
|
`It's the oldest rule in the book,' said the King. |
|
|
|
`Then it ought to be Number One,' said Alice. |
|
|
|
The King turned pale, and shut his note-book hastily. |
|
`Consider your verdict,' he said to the jury, in a low, trembling |
|
voice. |
|
|
|
`There's more evidence to come yet, please your Majesty,' said |
|
the White Rabbit, jumping up in a great hurry; `this paper has |
|
just been picked up.' |
|
|
|
`What's in it?' said the Queen. |
|
|
|
`I haven't opened it yet,' said the White Rabbit, `but it seems |
|
to be a letter, written by the prisoner to--to somebody.' |
|
|
|
`It must have been that,' said the King, `unless it was |
|
written to nobody, which isn't usual, you know.' |
|
|
|
`Who is it directed to?' said one of the jurymen. |
|
|
|
`It isn't directed at all,' said the White Rabbit; `in fact, |
|
there's nothing written on the OUTSIDE.' He unfolded the paper |
|
as he spoke, and added `It isn't a letter, after all: it's a set |
|
of verses.' |
|
|
|
`Are they in the prisoner's handwriting?' asked another of |
|
the jurymen. |
|
|
|
`No, they're not,' said the White Rabbit, `and that's the |
|
queerest thing about it.' (The jury all looked puzzled.) |
|
|
|
`He must have imitated somebody else's hand,' said the King. |
|
(The jury all brightened up again.) |
|
|
|
`Please your Majesty,' said the Knave, `I didn't write it, and |
|
they can't prove I did: there's no name signed at the end.' |
|
|
|
`If you didn't sign it,' said the King, `that only makes the |
|
matter worse. You MUST have meant some mischief, or else you'd |
|
have signed your name like an honest man.' |
|
|
|
There was a general clapping of hands at this: it was the |
|
first really clever thing the King had said that day. |
|
|
|
`That PROVES his guilt,' said the Queen. |
|
|
|
`It proves nothing of the sort!' said Alice. `Why, you don't |
|
even know what they're about!' |
|
|
|
`Read them,' said the King. |
|
|
|
The White Rabbit put on his spectacles. `Where shall I begin, |
|
please your Majesty?' he asked. |
|
|
|
`Begin at the beginning,' the King said gravely, `and go on |
|
till you come to the end: then stop.' |
|
|
|
These were the verses the White Rabbit read:-- |
|
|
|
`They told me you had been to her, |
|
And mentioned me to him: |
|
She gave me a good character, |
|
But said I could not swim. |
|
|
|
He sent them word I had not gone |
|
(We know it to be true): |
|
If she should push the matter on, |
|
What would become of you? |
|
|
|
I gave her one, they gave him two, |
|
You gave us three or more; |
|
They all returned from him to you, |
|
Though they were mine before. |
|
|
|
If I or she should chance to be |
|
Involved in this affair, |
|
He trusts to you to set them free, |
|
Exactly as we were. |
|
|
|
My notion was that you had been |
|
(Before she had this fit) |
|
An obstacle that came between |
|
Him, and ourselves, and it. |
|
|
|
Don't let him know she liked them best, |
|
For this must ever be |
|
A secret, kept from all the rest, |
|
Between yourself and me.' |
|
|
|
`That's the most important piece of evidence we've heard yet,' |
|
said the King, rubbing his hands; `so now let the jury--' |
|
|
|
`If any one of them can explain it,' said Alice, (she had |
|
grown so large in the last few minutes that she wasn't a bit |
|
afraid of interrupting him,) `I'll give him sixpence. _I_ don't |
|
believe there's an atom of meaning in it.' |
|
|
|
The jury all wrote down on their slates, `SHE doesn't believe |
|
there's an atom of meaning in it,' but none of them attempted to |
|
explain the paper. |
|
|
|
`If there's no meaning in it,' said the King, `that saves a |
|
world of trouble, you know, as we needn't try to find any. And |
|
yet I don't know,' he went on, spreading out the verses on his |
|
knee, and looking at them with one eye; `I seem to see some |
|
meaning in them, after all. "--SAID I COULD NOT SWIM--" you |
|
can't swim, can you?' he added, turning to the Knave. |
|
|
|
The Knave shook his head sadly. `Do I look like it?' he said. |
|
(Which he certainly did NOT, being made entirely of cardboard.) |
|
|
|
`All right, so far,' said the King, and he went on muttering |
|
over the verses to himself: `"WE KNOW IT TO BE TRUE--" that's |
|
the jury, of course-- "I GAVE HER ONE, THEY GAVE HIM TWO--" why, |
|
that must be what he did with the tarts, you know--' |
|
|
|
`But, it goes on "THEY ALL RETURNED FROM HIM TO YOU,"' said |
|
Alice. |
|
|
|
`Why, there they are!' said the King triumphantly, pointing to |
|
the tarts on the table. `Nothing can be clearer than THAT. |
|
Then again--"BEFORE SHE HAD THIS FIT--" you never had fits, my |
|
dear, I think?' he said to the Queen. |
|
|
|
`Never!' said the Queen furiously, throwing an inkstand at the |
|
Lizard as she spoke. (The unfortunate little Bill had left off |
|
writing on his slate with one finger, as he found it made no |
|
mark; but he now hastily began again, using the ink, that was |
|
trickling down his face, as long as it lasted.) |
|
|
|
`Then the words don't FIT you,' said the King, looking round |
|
the court with a smile. There was a dead silence. |
|
|
|
`It's a pun!' the King added in an offended tone, and |
|
everybody laughed, `Let the jury consider their verdict,' the |
|
King said, for about the twentieth time that day. |
|
|
|
`No, no!' said the Queen. `Sentence first--verdict afterwards.' |
|
|
|
`Stuff and nonsense!' said Alice loudly. `The idea of having |
|
the sentence first!' |
|
|
|
`Hold your tongue!' said the Queen, turning purple. |
|
|
|
`I won't!' said Alice. |
|
|
|
`Off with her head!' the Queen shouted at the top of her voice. |
|
Nobody moved. |
|
|
|
`Who cares for you?' said Alice, (she had grown to her full |
|
size by this time.) `You're nothing but a pack of cards!' |
|
|
|
At this the whole pack rose up into the air, and came flying |
|
down upon her: she gave a little scream, half of fright and half |
|
of anger, and tried to beat them off, and found herself lying on |
|
the bank, with her head in the lap of her sister, who was gently |
|
brushing away some dead leaves that had fluttered down from the |
|
trees upon her face. |
|
|
|
`Wake up, Alice dear!' said her sister; `Why, what a long |
|
sleep you've had!' |
|
|
|
`Oh, I've had such a curious dream!' said Alice, and she told |
|
her sister, as well as she could remember them, all these strange |
|
Adventures of hers that you have just been reading about; and |
|
when she had finished, her sister kissed her, and said, `It WAS a |
|
curious dream, dear, certainly: but now run in to your tea; it's |
|
getting late.' So Alice got up and ran off, thinking while she |
|
ran, as well she might, what a wonderful dream it had been. |
|
|
|
But her sister sat still just as she left her, leaning her |
|
head on her hand, watching the setting sun, and thinking of |
|
little Alice and all her wonderful Adventures, till she too began |
|
dreaming after a fashion, and this was her dream:-- |
|
|
|
First, she dreamed of little Alice herself, and once again the |
|
tiny hands were clasped upon her knee, and the bright eager eyes |
|
were looking up into hers--she could hear the very tones of her |
|
voice, and see that queer little toss of her head to keep back |
|
the wandering hair that WOULD always get into her eyes--and |
|
still as she listened, or seemed to listen, the whole place |
|
around her became alive the strange creatures of her little |
|
sister's dream. |
|
|
|
The long grass rustled at her feet as the White Rabbit hurried |
|
by--the frightened Mouse splashed his way through the |
|
neighbouring pool--she could hear the rattle of the teacups as |
|
the March Hare and his friends shared their never-ending meal, |
|
and the shrill voice of the Queen ordering off her unfortunate |
|
guests to execution--once more the pig-baby was sneezing on the |
|
Duchess's knee, while plates and dishes crashed around it--once |
|
more the shriek of the Gryphon, the squeaking of the Lizard's |
|
slate-pencil, and the choking of the suppressed guinea-pigs, |
|
filled the air, mixed up with the distant sobs of the miserable |
|
Mock Turtle. |
|
|
|
So she sat on, with closed eyes, and half believed herself in |
|
Wonderland, though she knew she had but to open them again, and |
|
all would change to dull reality--the grass would be only |
|
rustling in the wind, and the pool rippling to the waving of the |
|
reeds--the rattling teacups would change to tinkling sheep- |
|
bells, and the Queen's shrill cries to the voice of the shepherd |
|
boy--and the sneeze of the baby, the shriek of the Gryphon, and |
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all the other queer noises, would change (she knew) to the |
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confused clamour of the busy farm-yard--while the lowing of the |
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cattle in the distance would take the place of the Mock Turtle's |
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heavy sobs. |
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|
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Lastly, she pictured to herself how this same little sister of |
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hers would, in the after-time, be herself a grown woman; and how |
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she would keep, through all her riper years, the simple and |
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loving heart of her childhood: and how she would gather about |
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her other little children, and make THEIR eyes bright and eager |
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with many a strange tale, perhaps even with the dream of |
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Wonderland of long ago: and how she would feel with all their |
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simple sorrows, and find a pleasure in all their simple joys, |
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remembering her own child-life, and the happy summer days. |
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THE END |