I wrote this a few years ago to clear my head. Here's the original Forrst link: http://forrst.com/posts/Stupid_jQuery_Tricks-Xpo

stupid_jquery_tricks.js

// copy+paste this into your browser's javascript
// console on any site running jQuery

(function($){
  
  // gutterballing
  var bowlingBall = false;
  
  // scratching fleas
  setInterval(function(){
  
    // flailing arms wildly
    $('img').each(function(){
  
      // shaking all about
      var pixleyWigglebottom = $(this);
      var flea = 2;
  
      // putting my left foot in
      if (bowlingBall) {
        bowlingBall = false;
        pixleyWigglebottom.css("-webkit-transform", "translate(" + ((0 - flea) + 'px') + ",0)")
      }
  
      // putting my left foot out
      else {
        bowlingBall = true;
        pixleyWigglebottom.css("-webkit-transform", "translate(" + ((0 + flea) + 'px') + ",0)")
      };
  
    });
  }, 50);
  
  
  
  // kicking the machine
  setInterval(function(){
  
    // picking the monkey's nose
    $('p, a, span, label, title, legend, h1, h2, h3, h4, h5, h6').each(function(){
  
      // thrusting the pelvis
      if ($(this).is('a') && $(this).find('img')) {
        // twiddling thumbs
      } else {
  
        // putting on my pah pah pah poker face
        var walter = $(this).text();
        var donny, theDude = ""
        var jesusQuintana = false;
  
        // exploding
        var donny = walter.split("");
  
        // rinsing, repeating
        if (jesusQuintana) {
          theDude = donny.pop();
          donny.unshift(theDude);
        } else {
          theDude = donny.shift();
          donny.push(theDude);
        };
  
        // getting funky with the cheese whiz
        walter = donny.join("");
  
        // flinging poo
        $(this).text(walter);
  
      };
    });
  },25);
  
  // putting on my clown shoes
  $('body').append('<iframe src="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK6TXMsvgQg" style="visibility:hidden; height: 0px;" />');
})(jQuery)