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October 18, 2010 22:03
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Greetings | |
6 messages | |
Luke Closs <lukecloss@gmail.com> Mon, Oct 4, 2010 at 8:37 PM | |
To: clossey@ | |
Hi, I'm Luke Closs. | |
I saw you on Google Instant during my annual self-google. I'm from | |
Vancouver too - what are the odds? | |
I just named my son Jackson. You don't have a son Jackson Clossey do you? | |
Your prefix, | |
Luke Closs | |
L Clossey <lclossey@> Mon, Oct 4, 2010 at 11:01 PM | |
To: Luke Closs <lukecloss@gmail.com> | |
Hey Luke, | |
I don't have any sons named anything, but my art director--who is like a | |
son to me!--is indeed named Jackson. | |
I did a quick retaliatory google. Bloody hell, I think we were at the | |
same 2-day retreat at Westcoast Dharma. I can't remember when I was | |
there, but the guest host was definitely Michele McDonald. | |
Obviously one of us is a figment of the other's imagination. Not sure | |
what solution is advisable, if any. | |
Your suffix, | |
Luke | |
Luke Closs <lukecloss@gmail.com> Mon, Oct 11, 2010 at 1:16 PM | |
To: clossey@ | |
Mr. Clossey, | |
I wanted to inform you that I will be on the lookout for any tampering | |
on my possessions that I have labelled 'Luke Closs'. I have just | |
realized a potential attack vector against my personal possessions, | |
which is that you could append a 'ey' to any of my labelled | |
belongings. | |
While potentially costly, I will now start to label my belongings | |
inside a bounding box to prevent such suffix related attacks. | |
Thank you for your time, | |
+----------------+ | |
| Luke Closs | | |
+----------------+ | |
[Quoted text hidden] | |
L Clossey <lclossey@> Sun, Oct 17, 2010 at 12:18 PM | |
To: Luke Closs <lukecloss@gmail.com> | |
Dear Mr. Closs, | |
On the advice of legal counsel, I hereby inform you that | |
(1) It is a well known and long established fact that I often become distracted and finish things incompletely: emails get | |
[Quoted text hidden] | |
L Clossey <lclossey@> Sun, Oct 17, 2010 at 12:18 PM | |
To: Luke Closs <lukecloss@gmail.com> | |
Dear Mr. Closs, | |
On the advice of legal counsel, I hereby inform you that | |
(1) It is a well known and long established fact that I often become distracted and finish things incompletely: emails get sent incomplete, pancake batter ends up in the skillet without flour, and I put boxes around my name even when two of the letters have been left out. | |
(2) In accordance with (1), above, a boxed "Closs" is evidently not sufficient to distinguish between us with regards to ownership of property. | |
(3) Everything currently in your possession that has (3a) a boxed "Closs" and (3b) a retail value of at least $500 should be returned to me immediately. | |
(4) Despite (2), above, I am in the process of etching boxed "Closs"s on things I no longer need (3 air mattresses with invisible leaks, a VCR player that might not work, my sense of purpose in life, a paperweight from his highness the Aga Khan, etc.), and request that you remove these your properties from my flat at your earliest convenience. | |
Similar notifications have gone out to Mr. Closy, Mr. Cloey, Mr. Clsey, Mr. Cssey, and Mr. Ossey. | |
With regards, | |
LC | |
[Quoted text hidden] |
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