some garbage

see comment section 

TL;DR - When you are the white male with education, and money, and (societal norm) power... you do not get to make the rules for how others can get to your level.

I generally approach this with an eye to apartheid or slavery or BLM or any suppressed people. The system that's been in place for 100s of years, one in which white males have been the drivers, is the reason these people are still having problems to this day. I.e. you only have yourself to blame. With everything then framed and viewed thru the W.M. filter the system then has problems identifying how it is outcasting those that don't align with that filter while still being very good candidates. Blaming someone for being a product of the current societal paradigm and not adhering to the top dog ideals is just maddening. If you dont play their game you dont get to play. Fuck that. Two things have really advanced these internal thoughts in the last 10 years. Getting married to someone that talks about this frequently and brings it to my attention and with whom i can discuss it with and coaching people. The vast majority of people i've coached are white, male, and wealthy. But I've also gotten to coach women and minorities (they still all tend to be pretty wealthy tho). Casual conversations, observing them move thru life. The ease with which one group can move about and the small hurdles that the other groups face. Being exposed to all this improves my ability to see this landscape. I try really hard to walk the mile in the others' shoes, to see things from their POV. First time meeting people this is really hard. Not knowing anything about them, catching myself jumping to conclusions, wanting to come back to the conversation hours later (<-- willing to do this once I know the person better to level a greater understanding with them).

A "friend" on FB posted some vid awhile back about her husband's all white (in spirit tho technically not in letter) private school in south africa getting besieged by protestors (black south africans) who wanted to attend (change the "rules" of the school... not written to be overtly racist but still to keep "those" people out). She pleaded for sympathy, sighting tradition ... wrong crowd to seek out for that. Can't recall seeing a sympathetic response. ****could keep going into deeper and deeper levels of introspection on this but.... i'll stop ****

You dont have an intellectual discussion on a topic of oppression. You don't, in the moment, get to play analytical observing nerd from your ivory tower when the person with whom you are discussing it with is battling in the trenches. To you it's academic, to them it's life.

When you have everything and have showcased a history of using your everything to acquire even more everything and then to suppress those with nothing... you don't get to dictate the terms of what is right and wrong.