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bios - Merlin likes to change his Twitter bio for some reason. #runx

Good Twitter Bios runx


The bar is in the globe.

This is a factory, not a circus.

I weigh less than a slice of bread.

Someone is staring at you in Personal Growth.

That's a hell of a hot tub you have out there.

Into the cauldron, handsome!


Sleeping all night in vinegar because I am pickle.

That's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit.

Wait for the crème.

Shall I tell you why I really invited you here?

I'm a retired investor, living on a pension.

"I don't know which side of anything to look at," protested Milo.

My smile is stuck. I cannot go back to your frownland.

Why on Earth should I moan?

You can't do it unless the number is two.

Originally released as a French-language concept album.

This was the end of the river all right.

I'm sorry, Aunt Lydia.


I got through all of last year, and I'm here.

For heaven's sake, it's really loud with the Shop-Vac on.

The act was abandoned and some xylophone players were brought on to restore order.

How long is a piece of string?

How thick is wall?

There's a greater purpose at work. And, we serve it together. Whether we know it or not.

I won this 55 inch TV for less than $30 on deal dash dot com


Looks like we got ourselves an old-fashioned pawn shop waffle iron bidding war.

I was the dandy of Gamma Chi.

Peg. Back to you. Peg. Shutter falls. All in 3D. Foreign movie. Peg.

I got a hole in my back that I can see out.

I've liked you for a thousand years. A thousand years.

This is not a poncho library.

City Correspondent.

Shackling the masses with drastic rap tactics.

No touching.

Still, where'd the lighter fluid come from?

No alarms and no surprises, please.

You singing too but your grandma ain't my grandma

Tell the bartender I think I'm falling in love.

There will be feasting and dancing in Jerusalem next year.

These days, she says, I feel my life just like a river running through.

She comes in incense and patchouli.

Poor Professor Lupin's having a really tough night.

Barbara, your depth frightens me.

Because he's MY butler.

Making life-size models of The Velvet Underground in clay.


Un monsieur triste en costume.

They crowded up to Lenin with their noses worn off.

Thou never shalt hear herald any more.

I just said what I said and it was wrong. Or it was taken wrong. And now it's all this.

Study hard, guys -- trust me.

There was a little toolshed where he made us suffer. Sad Satan.

I cried when I wrote this song. Sue me if I play too long.

In a world too often governed by corruption and arrogance, it can be difficult to stay true to one’s philosophical and literary principles.

They airbrushed my face.

The city's sixth most important financial advisor.

I’m a trust fund baby—you can trust me!

Nobody likes an outfit tracker.

That's just weak songwriting. You wrote a bad song, Petey.

Redemption? Sure. But in the end, he's just another dead rat in a garbage pail behind a Chinese restaurant.

It's amateur night in Dixie.

Phone rings, door chimes, in comes company.

This magic keeps me alive, but it's making me crazy.

Nice going, Angelica.

Sometimes there’s a man.

Ever thus to deadbeats, Lebowski.

I never said she stole my money.

This dollhouse is my fancy.

In 1984, I was hospitalized for approaching perfection.

You never saw so many phonies in all your life.

In Wind Gap, recyclables go out on Wednesday.

Tolling steady like a dial tone.

These stairs are covered with Swarovski crystals.

I need support staff to leave the room.

Vatican Cameos.

My place is here. I fight with you.

There ain't no Coupe de Ville hiding at the bottom of a Cracker Jack box.

If we heard mortar shells we'd cuss more in our songs and cut down on guitar solos.

Originally discovered in jellyfish.

Moderate or good; occasionally very poor.

They’ve Got it…in Dubai!™

Well on my way to the luckiest night of my life.

It's a big world, girl, and I can't understand it. We're tiny white specks in a bright blue planet.

He likes the warm feeling, but he's tired of all the dehydration.

I like the old days. But not all the old days. Only the good old days.

Unfortunately, Jim, there is no Double Redemption Island.

I'm a Terrezano's girl.

I'm in pain, and I'm wet, and I'm still hysterical.

Hoot, hoot. I'm an owl now.

I'm not talking to clouds on a sunny day.

Well, I've got style. So much style, and it's wasting.

Honey, I'm a prize, and you're a catch, and we're a perfect match.

Irish folk tales scare the shit out of me.

Is 100 the right number?

Afraid is where we've lived for far too long.

The big yellow one is the sun.

I used to be able to name every nut that there was.

Now how am I gonna find out what I wanna find out if he no find out what I gotta find out?

Fifteen is my limit on schnitzengruben.

Everyone hates the cave people.

Spaceships don't come equipped with rear view mirrors.

Our love is rice and beans and horse's lard.

Sometimes I rhyme slow. Sometimes I rhyme quick.

Troll the respawn, Jeremy.

I dump your ass.

Stop your belly-aching, and hose me!

Squeezed and pulled and hurt my neck in 1988.

Charlie Babbitt squeezed and pulled and hurt my neck in 1988.

"…which, if true, means death for us all."

Bob Wood, National Program Director of the Chum Group, worked with us in producing…

"This is the revolutionary costume."

I get so tired after midday, lately.

Why are my tribal vases under the sink?

Haunted corn maze actor tips please?

Hey everybody, welcome to the club! Hope you enjoy the experience of simply cybersex blast off into cybersex Joe Biden.

One must put up barriers to keep oneself intact.

Always hopeful, yet discontent.

Columnated ruins domino.

This browser does not support the Ad element.

Please use the accessory wall thoughtfully and strategically.

Proud Klein’s Disease Survivor

Let them brush your rock and roll hair.

I got through all of last year, and I'm here.

The original coconut oil-puller

End of the laneway. Don't come up the property.

Eyes on your own work there, super chief.

Smiling Asian Teenage Boy

I was in this drop-D metal band we called ‘Requiem.’

$27.94 - My Life as Vending Machine for 18" Doll. Free 2-day shipping on $35+ orders. Learn More.

I'm not a present for your friends to open.

I know almost all of the words to "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road."

My clown is clean, and my conscience is clear.

Frames are where the money is.

Shoshanna has a collection of more than 350 nitrate film prints.

EAT it, Harvey!

I’m so upset about my perennials.

What's a game of chance to you to him is one of real skill.

$50 per person per hour

"His left arm weighs SEVENTY-FIVE POUNDS."

I just want people to be happy.

The only thing I know for sure is this: a horse's head is finally unknowable to me.

Like a dog want a bag.

Are you amplified to rock?

Giant soap curtains for public presentations.

Hell's broke loose in Georgia, and the devil deals the cards.

Professional “Before” Photo.

In 1984, I was hospitalized for approaching perfection.

The car is on fire, and there's no driver at the wheel.


Welcome to The Knot Store. My Name is Alan.

I did some sagas on Carole Baskin.

Former Reptile Dealer.

Real Poshmark User.

Pulled into Economy Island. King Shit and the Golden Boys.

Sadness accrues.

I should know. I'm a medical doctor. I own a mansion and a yacht.

Verified amateur.

Verified Teen MILF.

You should be thanking me every time I can't get hard.

Jester of Boss.

Cottage cheese. Cottage industry. Ricotta cheese. Reggatta de Blanc.

Sweet Jason. He is just a boy.

Stop bending the shafts!

In 1980, I came in 13th place in the Suncoast Spelling Bee.

Ton of white boy guilt, that's my problem. Obstacle to joy, one reason to use some drugs.

That fellow teen will be the death of me.

As a coconut vendor, I seek truth.

Suppose you run your business and let me run mine?

If we don't come down hard on these clowns, we are going to be up to our balls in jugglers.

I'm the best seventeen-year-old ever.

Just pay a separate fee.

Honestly, it’s kind of draining.

Could I get two coffee cups?

Thursday is my Thursday.

Dumb, but effective.

How shall I defend the wax fortresses of my love?

Save it for the show.

You, Mr. Bemis, do not function within the organization.

The ones who love us least are the ones we'll die to please.

Life can be brutal on a farm.

Have you heard? It's in the stars—next July, we collide with Mars.

Red Five, standing by.

She used to spit on her own floor. That never made any sense to me.

No, it’s not an established song.

Have you tried making everything smaller?

At sixes and sevens with you.

Richmond on 12.

Now, Somerset's climbing on the furniture.

Don't you ever besmirch Billy Joel.

It's not the band I hate, it's their fans.

And the spread. What a spread.

Are Magnesium and scorn sufficient to support a town?

There are warnings of gales in Trafalgar.

Daddy like a pretty baby?

Now, I'm sick off of your mudpie.

You're not to let the Brothers Marx wait in my office ever. They've been grilling hot dogs again.

Forget what happened yesterday—I know that better things are on the way.

Dépéche-toi, dépéche-toi et attends!

I'm more of a cornhole man myself.

Shipley's Steak House is unmatched in its cuisine and ambience.

I'm an unborn letter. With so much potential.

Ricordati che è un film comico.

We're gonna break out the hats and hooters when Josie comes home.

Specially Mixed for Your Personal Cassette Player.

It yearns me not if men my garments wear.

A VP's faith is one single long.

"Stay safe! 😬👍"

Maybe I used too many monkeys.

I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.

Your ass used to be beautiful.

You taste like a burger. I don't like you any more.

I was thinking of my telephone number.

Salesman of the Month

Senior Web Producer

Unwilling Instrument of Grace

Replacement Organist

Lord Sheldon has a growth.

Now, why can't you be more like Kahlua?

I know a fireman who looks after the fire.

Who needs a car when you got a boat?


Rock me, Joseph Alberto Santiago.

There’s too many captains on this island.

Orchids are part of my process.

What could you possibly see in little ol' three-chord me?

You can't fool us by agreeing with us.

Don't know about you, but I am un chien andalusia.

Trajectory is good; thrust is good.

Background in Bird Law

I used to be fat, but now I have two nieces.

You want me to box up this jerb kazzaz for you?

I must make my witness.

Keep your hands off my lobby boy.

Insanity laughs under pressure we're breaking

You gotta ask yourself do you want the job or do you want the story?

He's 28 years old.

I want to be a pretty girl.

Story continues below advertisement.

A man in my position can't afford to be made to look ridiculous.

Today is Hildebrand's day.

Do you understand? The tables are my corn.

These are my livelihood.

The farts isn't a problem anymore.

I don't know why but I keep thinking something's bound to go wrong.

Columnated ruins domino.

I'm a student of institutions.

What Thou Lovest Well, Remains American.

It ain't no sin to be glad you're alive.

Todd, don't distract Mr. Peanutbutter with your weird pocket cheeses.

The Pineapple Suite is occupied.

Carol, hold my calls.

This site was chosen for its seclusion and scenic beauty.

And, here in the bar, the piano man's found another nail for my heart.

I'm writing a book on how to stay conscious when you drown.

I must decline, for secret reasons.

How does anything happen, Charlie?

Go ahead, Milton, just take out enough to win.

Look what you've done to this rock 'n' roll clown.

One likes to believe in the freedom of music.

I can't tell the staff from the customers.

Everyone's excited and confused.

Someday, this war's gonna end.

I guess I'm just a kid in a fat kid's body.

Shut up, Leonard. Nobody even knows what you're talking about.

Y'all don't want to hear me, ya just want to dance.

Our band is scientist rock.

Sorry to hear about the radiation leak on the ship.

She is dressed in traditional colonial garb.

A Johnny Gossamer Thriller.

They're not our dogs anymore.

Well, shit, Isaac. That is not ideal.

They've got no bullets.

She calls me the alphabet gun.

Who would've thought making a primer school for animals was a bad idea?

I've got that positive flame.

I made all my money off the big Charlie Brown.

I think my hat's probably cursed.


The local human children sing a kind of eerie little rhyme about him.

To wander aimlessly is very unswinging.

All I know is that there were rumors he was into field hockey players. There were rumors.

A C-class article from Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.

I don't think he gets us, man.

Cracklin' Rose, you're a store-bought woman.

We paradise in our wake.

Villainous company hath been the spoil of me.

Lot of information on a double album.

The movement you need is on your shoulder.

If this isn't nice, I don't know what is.

and an army surplus loner combed the outskirts of parole

I can't save you from my poor brain

Working on my puzzle

I can't believe that garbage is still coming in

We're all a big family here.

The Luckiest in Luckydom.

Let's end highway profanity.

It's not a big college town.

Chickens don't clap.

Actual Patient

Abominable things these machines; you can't reason with them.

Non-Linear Delivery Options. What are those things?

Running through the house with a pickle in my mouth.

You're in the movies now, and I'm in your cartoon.

Here's some cornbread.

Guess she don't like the cornbread either.

Before I put on my makeup, I say a little prayer for you.

The standard text editor.

What is this, courtesy class?

Will you go to lunch?

Sometimes I think I'm the tiredest man on earth.

Stop calling me Chief.

Well. I'm not. I'm older and a boy.

Why don't you live your life like that cow from the video?

Dirty monkey will not dance for you.

And I will be alone again tonight, my dear.

I am a fan.

Cold as ice cream, but still as sweet.


You buy a bag of peanuts in this town, you get a song written about you.

What a disagreeable old man I have become.



The Ukraine girls really knock me out.

I ain't saying you ain't pretty.

Some stupid with a flare gun.

Is he not taking the simulation seriously?

They call her Natasha when she looks like Elsie.

Pretender to the Throne of Alsace-Lorraine

When people keep punching you and punching you, it’s because they’re jealous of your homemade pants.

An earthquake's started forming underneath my feet today

She's the pebble in my mouth and underneath my feet

Keep your heart, Three Stacks

Don't debase yourself for a man who hasn't a single tureen on board.

Very Committed to The Monster Theory

I must live in the same world as everyone else.

If I spent all my time arguing with bigots I'd never get anything done.

My life makes me angry. Not you.

You don't know how to treat the crypt keeper.

Honey, I'm a prize, and you're a catch, and we're a perfect match.

I like to watch TV.

I don't think it's nice, you laughing.

Weekends, that's Nunzio's time.

Bird by bird

If you were a pill, I'd take a handful at my will.

I'm trying to match your energy.

Let all the children boogie.

We have to change the chemistry, right?

Yeah, Richie. I'm blowing somebody down at The Telegraph.

And, even these apples look fake, but at least they've got stars.

Then throws up, throws punches, throws everybody out.

I once walked into a brothel with a honeycomb and a jackass.

You think your gold and your lions and your gold lions make you better than everyone.


Cheap Chick in the City.

Delivered Quietly

Crashing my Scion TC at 100 miles per hour

Failed Bald Dancer

They'll never know you're just a bagel.

I'm not a miracle worker, I'm a janitor.

I don't like people touching my blue blanket.

I’m wearing a cardboard belt.

You've been chosen as an extra in the movie adaptation of the sequel to your life.

I used to be an investigative reporter of some repute.

Look out Hollywood, here I come.

The world is a pair of ill-fitting pants.

𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚗𝚘𝚝 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚋𝚕𝚎.

One likes to believe in the freedom of music.

I got a bunch of computer problems I'm gonna put you on.

That's nothing, you should hear me play piano.

Dance the cha-cha through 'til sunrise

Teenage Rebel of the Week

Moon. American. Floyd, Heywood, R.

Got any ham?

Me, I go from one extreme to another.

My own face is no longer a handsome one.

I feel the ribbon.

prologue-like your humble patience pray

How'd you like some ice cream, Doc?

Boy, this storm is really something, isn't it? Over!

Things could be better, Lloyd. Things could be a whole lot better.

Do you remember the raccoon, Hogarth?


All you gotta do is take it ten seconds at a time

Cheer up, sleepy Jean.

"Kathy, I'm lost," I said, though I knew she was sleeping.

You sure about that's not why?

Like coal campers' candles all lost in the snow.

This is a motorized vessel.

I was never able to become a banker.

Rodney Stink, Confirmed Bachelor

97X, Bam! The Future of Rock n' Roll.

Proud Lyndrome Syndrome Survivor

Everyone has their own rebellion.

Jo, we do not compare grandfathers.

It's not the side effects of the cocaine. I'm thinking that it must be love.

We edge nearer to death every time we plot.

I'm empty and aching, and I don't know why.

Greyhound don't float on water.

I wondered, and I guessed, and I tried.

Everything is everything, baby.

Back with another one of those block rockin' beats.

Just try to make it sound like you wrote it that way on purpose.

Wowser, Max.

Heaven is here but only skin deep.

Panta rhei.

Nightclub singer to secretary.

I'm meant to have a silica mud treatment.

What if I forget to burp the toilet wine?

I'm 56 years old, you little shit.

I've been sending signals into outer space

What's the secret, Max?

Arrest Liberty Valance?

Pretty good writer.

Ghosts appear and fade away.

So sorry about the butter.

I'm a character actor. Age has no effect on me.

Got a lot of carbon scoring.

Ain't no reason to get excited.

I work hard, but I don’t play hard. I play easy. Why would you play hard?

I play easy. Why would you play hard?

I got no enthusiasm to even answer the phone.

The work continues.

A basic pleasure model

Let us sit upon the ground and tell sad stories of the death of kings.

I would thou wert the man that would divorce this terror from my heart.

The whistle never came.

I can assure you now, very confidently, that it's going to be all right again.

And, everybody wants a hat.

Play me the song that makes it so tough.

The more you drive, the less intelligent you are.

College is for ugly people who can't tap dance.

That's where the heart is.

I can't make promises for the wind, Your Grace.

I got a job that takes me away.

My press has been damaged, my vowel tray beyond repair.

The Best Medical Airplane Expert in the World

In another life, we were arsonists.

My friend from overnight camp makes my beats.

Bert from Optics and Design

The work is mysterious and important.

A Sad Old Hamburger Waiter

Good evening, Mr. Deltoid.

I didn't wanna be this guy.

I feel like I might not like it in the death pit.

When in doubt, move on. No need to sort it out.

Wham bam! Mon chat, Splatch, gît sur mon lit.

More trouble than walking on foot.

an unwilling horse

Stay awake at night and count your REMs.

A Story about Johnny Magory

The Cruel Pubescence of Anst Dangler.

You're supposed to love me, you vile jelly.

Everyone loves Sharon.

Insubordinate and churlish.

Get the fuck off of my obstacle.

I found a LEGO head in my corn.

Which it will be ready when it's ready.

Let no man steal your thyme.

I come so together where you are.

Parking Lot King of Minnesota

How can a guy think and hit at the same time?

Showing Bunt

Space travels in my blood

The Program is Morally Good.

I am not disrespecting the captain.

The switchback will make you crazy.

Is one of us supposed to be a dog in this scenario?

We're on our way to fall in love.

The children are grumpy.

You didn't know the power of their world

I hope that you had fun in hi-skool

When I pointed out where the North Star is, she called me a fucking liar.

Clap. Clap for Radiohead.

Passion is no ordinary word.

Now, since I see you in his arms, I want you back.

I'm in a discovery phase.

Child Rapper and Internet Personality

Annie, there's a big lobster behind the refrigerator.

They said that to me. At a dinner.

Rob Rovani's ass out now.

The whole thing was done with the white of an egg.

It might be time to change my paradigm.

That's a nude egg I won from my game.

You've got to bleed for the dancer.

Telemarketing Specialist at Phone Group

Based on the long-running manga.

Annie, there's a big lobster behind the refrigerator.

These weeks flash their asses at me.

All secrets sleep in winter clothes.

How strange it is to be anything at all.

The hole I dig is bottomless.

I'm loaded with rocket fuel!

Know it? I WROTE it.

It takes a worried man to sing a worried song.

I spend so many twenty minutes

I know we suffer for fashion or whatever.

A flightless bird will take my life.

That's a llama.

Anti-Glasses Activist and Busy Mommy of Tahini and Taebo

In my corn.

Keep one step ahead of yourself.

Lifestyle Holden Caulfield

I remember damage. Then escape. Then adrift in a stranger's galaxy for a long, long time. But I'm safe now.

Safe, cool, and warm.

Mediocre, Morsov.

Unhousel'd, disappointed, unanel'd, No reckoning made

A worthy pioneer.

O for a Muse of fire

Tennis-balls, my liege.

Villainous company hath been the spoil of me.

All the information is on the task.

Marconi plays the mamba.

Shall I make my sausage dip?

Moon. American. Floyd, Haywood, R.

You can tell that this is not a plastic boat, and this slope is no joke at all.

It's just a show. I should really just relax.

All bubukles and whelks and knobs and flames o' fire.

$1 Steak for Life.

Happy New Year, losers.

Merlin can make mistakes. Consider checking important information.

I think you've got a third problem we've never seen before.

Ricordati che è un film comico.

We're not taking the picture without Michael.

Sometimes there's a man.

A Vicious Virious Cormarnt

We were buddies, Harold. You, me, and Fresno Bob.

One of them has eyes as big as Jolly Ranchers.

I'm so tired of the Omega Man.

I cannot compete with you, Jolene.

made of star stuff


The Saratoga Split

Popcorn Classics

Dr. San Vape Tent

Sippin' Mai Tais in Rochambeau.

Hitchhike to Rhome

The Shops at the Creeks

Oh, Africa, Brave Africa.

The King Gerald

Afternoon Spray

Special Upholstery Farm

Funk #49

The Mustard Region

Berry Buck Mills Stipe

Ricky Town. Population: Ricky.

Zion’s Landing

The Second Gate

Dangerous Nights Crew

The Vinegar of the Pompous

This wooden world.

Fort Amaya

At Rawlinson End

Paper Late!

The Cracker Pickle

In a seraglio

The Weather Gage

Mere Enthusiasm

The Thundercloud Formation

At a bar called O'Malley's

The Library Hollowed

Mr. Blazanov's Apparatus


This Beautiful Lounge Suite

Rubber Dinghy Rapids

It's a bug hunt.

Angels and Archways

Slemmel's Disease

Hogwarts Bukkake

The Henriad

The Beggar and the King

The Shadow of my Sorrow

Anna Delvey Foundation

1187 Hundertwasser

Dolorous Edd

Fondue with Cheddar

Monkey Gland Butt Injection

In Mexico with Sally

Inner City Pressure

The Hovel District

Chickchaw Territory

Mr. & Mrs. Dr. Francis Holden

The Electric Circus

Carmine's: A Place for Steaks

chicken-air-miles-steak scam

Any Forest Primeval

Cramblin Duvet

The Cheatin' Side of Town

Wing D

Rustic Fudge Project

Bob Cobb

CRM 114

Skip's Scramble

Exiled in Guyville

The Fanta Door

Leafy Meeting Pen

The Eye of the Duck

Chicago Sunroof

Van Dyke Brown

Reserve Best in Show

Caverns of Draconis

Fulminated Mercury

Star Lasso Experience

Streets Ahead

Sapir-Whorf Hypothesis

Burner Universe

Cathode Ray Mission

Relentless Bunny Hops

Now you find yourself in '82

Lust of Result

My wife, Mrs. Geary

The Small Council

inside the meat suit

Golliwog's Cakewalk

a secret sally port

At Liberty

Skillet Cheese

The Witness Position

Chicken McDonald's

Mr. Farnum's Absurd Restaurant


Vulcan's Stithy

Above the Spurv Plinth

The Hamburger Store

Rivers of Suggestion

The Holtzman Field Generator

Meinertzhagen's Haversack

Melting Crystalline Structures

Rapid-Reaction TEDx

Bolus of Gubbins

Grandpa's Automobile

A Ziggurat of Memories

Still collating

The Darkness of Candy's Hall

Moving Klingman Out

The Theoretical Limit

William Holden Drinking Helmet

Phrygian Mode

Match Game '75

low-skill raking attack

Walking on a wave's chicane.

Lake Ryomagori

Welcome to The Sack

Obama Fashion Show

Ramsett Park

Wade Boggs' Carpet World

The Outside Lands

Jake’s Childhood Bedroom

Standing Tall Before the Man


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