bootstrap.php

<?php
register_tick_function(function() {
    foreach ($GLOBALS as $name => $value) {
        if (is_string($value)) {
            $GLOBALS[$name] = new String($value);
        }
    }
});

declare (ticks=1);

magic.php

<?php
$string = 'João Batista Neto';

var_dump($string->explode(' '));

String.php

<?php
class String
{
    private $value;

    public function __construct($value)
    {
        $this->value = $value;
    }

    public function __toString()
    {
        return $this->value;
    }

    public function explode($sep)
    {
        return explode($sep, $this->value);
    }

}

HAHAHAHAHA