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This is my script for handling unsolicited sales calls. I can tell by the caller id as they usually come in on our second (unpublished) phone number.

Tips

  • _for best effect… leave off ‘Thank’ to make it sound like the tape already started…

The Script

Thank you for calling Planet Argon. If you know your party’s extension, please say or enter it followed by the pound key.

(wait 5-10 seconds…)

I’m sorry, I don’t recognize that extension. Please ensure you’re using a French-Canadian accent.

Thank you for calling Planet Argon. If you know your party’s extension, please say or enter it followed by the pound key.

(wait 5-10 seconds…)

I’m sorry, I don’t recognize that extension. Please ensure you’re using a French-Canadian accent.

For sales, please press one.

For customer support, please press two.

For all other inquiries, please press zero to replay this message.

..hopefully they’ll have hung up by this point.

For all other inquiries, please press zero to replay this message.
For all other inquiries, please press zero to replay this message.
For all other inquiries, please press zero to replay this message.
For all other inquiries, please press zero to replay this message.
For all other inquiries, please press zero to replay this message.
For all other inquiries, please press zero to replay this message.
For all other inquiries, please press zero to replay this message.

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