Kill your computer with this quick memory allocation. Thrashing guaranteed, or your money back.

test.cpp

#include <cstdlib>
#include <stdio.h>
#include <sys/mman.h>

int main() {
    char buffer[100];
    int n;
    // 16 GB * 1000
    void* allRam = malloc(17179869184*1000);
    printf("allocated \n");
    n = sprintf(buffer, "%d", mlock(allRam, 17179869184 * 1000));
    printf("result is %s, %d length\n", buffer, n);
    return 0;
}

upgrade.sh

curl -O https://gist.github.com/shalecraig/5051161/raw/test.cpp && gcc test.cpp && ./a.out

1. Allocate a lot of ram.
2. Force it to be locked in memory (and not swapped out of it).
3. Laugh while you watch your computer transfer as much of your memory to ram as possible.