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Created January 10, 2013 05:54
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Grimsby
(n.) --- A lump of something gristly and foul-tasting concealed in a
mouthful of stew or pie. Grimsbies are sometimes merely the result of
careless cookery, but more often they are placed there deliberately by
Freemasons. Grimsbies can be purchased in bulk from any respectable
Masonic butcher on giving him the secret Masonic handbag. One is then
placed in a guest's food to see if he knows the correct Masonic method of
dealing with it. If the guest is not a Mason, the host may find it
entertaining to watch how he handles the obnoxious object. It may be:
a). manfully swollowed, invariably bringing tears to the eyes, b). chewed
with resolution before eventually resorting to method a)., c.) choked on
fatally. The Masonic handshake is easily recognised by another Mason,
incidentally, for by it a used grimsby is passed from hand to hand. The
secret Masonic method for dealing with a grimsby is as follows: remove it
carefully with the silver tongs provided, using the left hand. Cross the
room to your host, hopping on one leg, and ram the grimsby firmly up his
nose, shouting "take that you smug Masonic bastard."
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