Debugs horribly-encoded currency symbols stored inside serialized arrays which won't deserialize

Balls.php

<?php
require( '../wordpress/wp-load.php' );

if ( !class_exists( 'IXR_Client' ) ) {
    require( '../wordpress/wp-includes/class-IXR.php' );
}

function repair_strlen( $ser ) {
    return preg_replace('!s:(\d+):"(.*?)";!se', "'s:'.strlen('$2').':\"$2\";'", $ser );
}

function get_raw_meta( $id, $key ) {
    global $wpdb;
    return $wpdb->get_var( "SELECT meta_value FROM {$wpdb->postmeta} WHERE meta_key = '{$key}' AND post_id = {$id}" );
}

$configs = $wpdb->get_results( "SELECT ID, post_name FROM wp_posts WHERE post_type = 'legacy_offer_config'" );

foreach ( $configs as $config ) {
    $region = array_shift( wp_get_object_terms( $config->ID, 'region' ) );
    
    $client = new IXR_Client( 'http://' . XMLRPC_ENDPOINT . '/xmlrpc.php' );
    $client->query( 'emusic.getOfferConfig', $config->post_name, $region->name );
    $response = $client->getResponse();
    
    if ( in_array( $region->name, array( 'US', 'CA' ) ) ) {
        $serialized = get_raw_meta( $config->ID, 'reg_config' );
        if ( strstr( $serialized, '&euro;' ) || strstr( $serialized, '&pound;' ) ) {
            $parsed = repair_strlen( str_replace( array( '&euro;', '&pound;' ), '$', $serialized ) );
            echo 'Paste this in: ', PHP_EOL, PHP_EOL, $parsed, PHP_EOL, PHP_EOL;
            
            exit( "{$config->ID}:{$region->name} reg_config contains bad currencies" );
        }
        
        $serialized = get_raw_meta( $config->ID, 'pitch_config' );
        if ( strstr( $serialized, '&euro;' ) || strstr( $serialized, '&pound;' ) ) {
            $parsed = repair_strlen( str_replace( array( '&euro;', '&pound;' ), '$', $serialized ) );
            echo 'Paste this in: ', PHP_EOL, PHP_EOL, $parsed, PHP_EOL, PHP_EOL;
            
            exit( "{$config->ID}:{$region->name} pitch_config contains bad currencies" );
        }        
    }
    
    if ( !is_array( $response['registrationConfig'] ) ) {
        $serialized = get_raw_meta( $config->ID, 'reg_config' );
        $value = unserialize( $serialized );
        
        if ( empty( $value ) )
            echo "reg_config won't deserialize" . PHP_EOL;
        
        $fixed = repair_strlen( $serialized );
        $data = @unserialize( $fixed ); 
        
        if ( is_array( $data ) )
            echo "Can be fixed with script", PHP_EOL, PHP_EOL, $fixed, PHP_EOL, PHP_EOL;   
        
        exit( "{$config->ID}:{$region->name} has a broken reg config" );
    }
    
    if ( !is_array( $response['pitchConfig'] ) ) {
        $serialized = get_raw_meta( $config->ID, 'pitch_config' );
        $value = unserialize( $serialized );
        
        if ( empty( $value ) )
            echo "pitch_config won't deserialize" . PHP_EOL;
        
        $fixed = repair_strlen( $serialized );
        $data = @unserialize( $fixed );
        
        if ( is_array( $data ) )
            echo "Can be fixed with script", PHP_EOL, PHP_EOL, $fixed, PHP_EOL, PHP_EOL;   
        
        exit( "{$config->ID}:{$region->name} has a broken pitch config" );
    }
}