A few weeks ago I decided I wanted to grow a beard. The interaction did not go quite how I expected.
Me: So, I'm looking to grow a beard. Not just any beard, but one that ends at my knees. I want to turn heads when I take my shirt off. I've got a trip to Nigeria coming up in three months, so I need to start growing this as soon as possible.
Beard Grower: I can definitely help you with that!