gaussfacts output.txt

Once, Fermat contrariated Gauss, and the result was "The Last Fermat Theorem" (bye bye Fermat!)
Gauss had already known the website 'Gauss Facts', so he saved his time for an autobiography.
Gauss can walk through Konigsberg crossing its bridges once and only once
Gauss knows an algorithm to compute the class group of any normal variety.
Gauss once proved the Fundamental Theorem of Algebra by explicitly writing out every nonconstant polynomial over the complex numbers and writing each as a product of linear factors.
Gauss once determined whether P = NP, but didn't think it was important enough to publish.
Gauss can prove axioms.
A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hello, Professor Gauss."
Gauss can invert matrices even if its determinant is zero.  
Gauss solves Navier-Stokes equations by hand.
Gauss found BB(6), but his publisher refused to print it.
Gauss classified the finite groups. When he was finished with the simple ones, there were none left.
Gauss can see the color of his own hat.
Erdos believed God had a book of all perfect mathematical proofs. God believes Gauss has such a book. 
Gauss can prove the consistency of ZFC.
Gauss checkmated Watson in 3 moves using BASIC on an Atari 2600.
The most precise statement of the well-ordering theorem is: Gauss has bothered to well-order every set. Since we do not know if he has, it is undecidable.
The universe is expanding so that entropy can increase faster than Gauss proves theorems.
Gauss once said suppose sqrt(2) = p/q where p&q are integers. He found 2 such integers.
Gauss can convert Meters to degrees Celsius.
When Gauss was cremated, he rebuilt himself into two copies of himself using the Banach-Tarski theorem
In Gauss’ mind, there is no such branch of mathematics as “Number Theory”. This is because he knows it as “Number Facts”.
Gauss always get R-squared = 1.
Gauss doesn't look for roots of equations, they come to him.
Gauss once hurt Kroniker's ego by telling him "Actually, God gave us just the transcendental numbers; the rest are man's approximations". 
Gauss can create electric field inside a conductor.
For Gauss, non-correlation implies independence.
Gauss can understand income tax.
Gauss is the only person who knows if Schrödinger's cat's still alive - he doesn't need to look to know this
Gauss doesn't do Lagrange multiplers - for him there are no constraints!
Gauss can prove the consistency of the axioms within the system.
Primes that aren't Gaussian primes get teased.
To iron a shirt, Gauss first applies a diffeomorphism to transform it to a flat piece of fabric.
Gauss decides if a unique factorization domain exists or not depending on how many ways he chooses to factor an element.
Gauss can solve a Rubik's cube in 3 moves.
If mathematicians were Turing machines, Gauss would be the Busy Beaver.
Black holes are the result of Gauss cutting up stars and reassembling them into peas.
Guass does not factor numbers, numbers give Gauss their factorization
Mr. and Mrs. Gauss invented the Gaussian copula on their wedding night.
Gauss can count to aleph one.
Gauss can split a bar magnet and produce two magnetic monopoles.
Gauss can draw every non-Lebesgue-measurable set.
Gauss knows explicit well-orderings of the reals.
God does not play dice, unless Gauss promises to let him win once in a while.
Gauss used to refer to complex numbers as "Not necessarily real but just as simple" numbers
Nature abhors singularities. But even it had to make way for Gauss to exist.
The common phrase used by mathematicians, "Let n be an integer", is literally a request to Gauss to allow it to be so.  
Gauss's mom never tells him his birthday. Gauss calculates it.
Gauss, only using three sticks whose lenghts are a, b, c, can build a triangle even if a + b < c
Ink from Gauss's pen can cure cancer. Too bad he does all his calculations in his head and never uses a pen.
Gauss sorts in log n time.
The monster group is scared of Gauss.

Gauss once figured out an expression for every real number as a fraction, but he got bored writing them down. The ones he didn't document are now called irrational.
Gauss skips Step 2 of the Feynman problem solving algorithm:
1. Write down the problem. 
2. Think very hard. 
3. Write down the answer.
Gauss didn’t discover the normal distribution, nature conformed to his will.
Gauss can let epsilon be less than zero.
Gauss doesn't walk, he just rotates the Earth below him.
Gauss can escape from a black hole.
Gauss can calculate 100! only using one "int" variable in C.
Gauss can solve the halting problem.
First the earth was without math. And Gauss said, "Let there be math". And it was so. And Gauss saw that math was good; and Gauss separated math from everything else. And that was the first day.
It was only after Gauss' death that we had the concept of "Largest known prime". Till then, Gauss knew all infinity of them
There is no Nobel Prizes in Mathematics because Gauss earned them all the first year Nobel was giving them.
Gauss once proved a theorem, but he didn't like it. So he disproved it.
Gauss once created an axiomatic system that was both consistent and complete
Gauss proved the parallel postulate using only a straightedge.
Gauss determined the orbit of Ceres with a quick skyward glance one night, but pretended to solve the orbit's eighth degree equation with three observations just to give the rest of us a chance.
Gauss can turn a circle inside out, unfortunately he did it once and left it that way and now we can't turn it back.
Gauss has an Erdos number of -1.
Gauss proved an omnipotent God since writing Q.E.D on a mirror.
Every cardinal is easily accesible for Gauss.
"Only two things are infinite, the human stupidity and Gauss' intellect, and I'm not sure about the human stupidity." - Albert Einstein
For Gauss all knots are trivial.
Gauss can smoothly deform a sphere into a torus.
The third dimension exists because Gauss created it to get gas, water, and power to his three friends' houses.
Gauss knows there are no uninteresting numbers, because he knows the interesting thing about each one.
Gauss invented the infinite improbability drive
Gauss once crossed all of Königsberg's 7 bridges while crossing every bridge only once.
In His great Elimination, Gauss gave us the Triangulars.
Hilbert's problems are a compilation of twenty-three problems Hilbert took from a list of exercises Gauss had left to the reader in one of his manuscripts.
Gauss developed Fractal Theory when he had broccoli for first time, but considered it obvious enough and didn't publish.
Gauss doesn't understand P?=NP. To him, everything is constant time.
Gauss proved that the continuum hypothesis is not independent of his choice.
For Gauss, there are no indefinite integrals.
Gauss doesn't integrate with respect to x, x differentiates with respect to gauss. 
Let n be your age. Then lim n-> infinity (#{your theorems}/#{Gauss' theorems}) = 0. And Gauss is dead.
The empty set is defined as the set of theorems Gauss can't prove.
Central Limit Theorem was the excuse God invented to obey Gauss.
Gauss invented the first 64qbit quatum computer 200 years ago, but it slowed down his work...
Gauss can make a combination of linearly independent vectors equal 0 (without coefficients of 0) just by brute force.  
Gauss chooses ε < 0.
Gauss can recite all of pi - backwards.
Some series diverge because Gauss doesn't consider them worthy of summing up.
The actual statement of Godel's incompleteness theorem is that every consistent system cannot prove the existence of Gauss ,and it directly implies the version we know nowadays.
Gauss can take the line integral of a closed path over a gradient vector field and get 1. 
Gauss can fill 75% of the volume of a cubic box using only close-packed spheres.
On Day One Gauss divided by 0 and thus the universe was created.
Gauss disproved Godel's Incompleteness Theorem by exhaustion.
Gauss can swap limits and integrals whenever he wants.
All your theorems are belong to Gauss.
Gauss wrote Flatlands to explain the universe to God.
When Hilbert complained that every room in his hotel was full, his friend Gauss did him a favor and found a spot for the next guest.
Gauss doesn't understand why some people think P != NP. He can solve anything in constant time.
What Fermat meant to say was in fact: "(...) I have found a remarkable proof of this fact in Gauss's notebook, but He used wider margins than this book does."
Order of operations, as we use it today, comes from historians' efforts of looking through Gauss's proofs and deciding which order he performed operations in.
Gauss can make any knot an unknot. 
When Carl Gauss is solving the A+B problem, he always reduces it into a NP-hard problem in O(1) time and then solve it in O(1) time.
For Gauss finding a solution is easier than checking it, NP
Gauss knows a polynomial-time algorithm for 3-SAT.
Gauss can find every solution for all Navier-Stokes equations, with or without singularities.
Gauss is an actual oracle for all reduction problems.
Gauss has observed the Higgs Boson.
Contrary to a common belief, Gauss is actually worth 10,000 Teslas.
Gauss doesn't know what the Uncertainty principle is, because he is certain of everything.
Gauss invented numerical methods as a service to humanity. There's nothing he can't integrate.
Gauss never has an underfull hbox (badness 10000) warning.
Gauss can draw as many lines as he wants through any point not on a given line parallel to the given line in a plane.
Gauss can construct transcendental numbers only using a compass.
Gauss once constructed the set of all sets in his head.
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and Gauss' intellect , and I'm not sure about the universe" - Albert Einstein
Gauss can remove singularities by using Gaussian elimination.
Gauss has Hilbert hotels on Mayfair and Park Lane.
God and Gauss have a deal.  When God finally stumps Gauss with a theorem to prove, the world will end.  Since we're still on Earth guess how that's going?
In mathematics the equivalent of a Nobel Prize is the Fields Medal. It is awarded to those individuals with the best Gauss impression that year.
Gauss' open balls include their surface. 
Gauss can guard any art gallery all by himself.
Riemann once said "If only I had the theorems! Then I should find the proofs easily enough." Sure, if by finding he meant asking Gauss.
Gauss can solve any Rubik's cube in only 1 move. 
Gauss proved that there are more real numbers than integer numbers, by counting them.
Gauss created an engine more efficient than Carnot's
Gauss can colour any map using only one colour.
Gauss finds all Lie algebras simple.
“Uncountably Infinite” was a phrase coined to explain the intelligence of Gauss.
Gauss knows the last 4 digits of Pi
Carl Gauss once calculated out every possible outcome of a game of chess. (Hint: every one involves him winning.)
If Gauss finds no correlation, they're independent.
Gauss knows if the continuum hypothesis is true or false.
Gauss considers using more than one digit a waste of time and thus writes numbers in base infinite.
Gauss can prove theorems by using induction on the reals.
Whenever Gauss tries to solve a problem in R^4, he generalizes the problem for R^n and then makes n=4.
Whenever Gauss was tired, he'd just differentiate his need for sleep until it was back to 0.
In elementary school when Gauss was asked if he could add 1 - 1/3 + 1/5 - ..., he replied it was as easy as a piece of pi.
Gauss once managed to square the circle, using only his fingernails and a piece of chocolate. 
Gauss hotel had room to accommodate all the guests from full Hilbert hotel, and still had rooms for all the reals.
The frost on Gauss' beer glass is Bose–Einstein condensate
Gauss proved induction using a proof by induction.
Q: What's purple and commutes?
A: Whatever Gauss tells us it is.
Cayley's theorem is true because Gauss had only created permutation groups.
“Whoever undertakes to set himself up as the judge of truth and knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of Carl Gauss.” - Albert Einstein
Occam’s Razor – The principle stating that the explanation of any phenomenon is equal to the explanation that came out of Gauss’ mouth.
There are no postulates, only theorems Gauss believes are unworthy of a proof.
Gauss can construct a regular 17-gon...using only a ruler. 
Gauss is not troubled by problems, problems are troubled by Gauss.
You'll get the Error when you try to integrate the Gaussian.
When Godel heard that Gauss could prove anything, he asked Gauss to prove the statement "There exists a statement that Gauss cannot prove."  gauss proved the statement, but there was still no statement he could not prove.  This is how the quantum state was born. 
Gauss doesn't need to use L'Hopital's Rule. Indiscriminate problems just answer themselves for him.
There does not exist any finite number n such that n near-sighted policemen could keep Gauss from sneaking into the town.
Gauss can recite Graham's number, forwards.
Imaginary numbers are simply those that Gauss has not deemed worthy of existence.
When Gauss thinks about The Game he wins.
There are no closed form expressions for roots of degree greater than 5 polynomials because Gauss got bored writing them down.
Gauss is the only person whom Archimedes allows to disturb his circles
Gauss's integers are more awesome and complex than your integers.
The Millennium Problems are trivial. That's why Gauss never bothered to prove them - he left them as an exercise for the reader.
All theorems were once called "The Gauss Theorem", however Gauss allowed others to take credit so it wouldn't confuse everyone else.
When Gauss wants to solve a problem in R^4, he visualizes R^n and then makes n=4.
Gauss considers infinity as the first non-trivial case in a proof by induction.
The empty set is defined as the set of all the true statements Gauss cannot prove.
Fermat thought the margin of the book was too small to contain the proof of his Last Theorems. Gauss knows a proof for which it is too large.
It is conjectured that a long time ago, Gauss performed an inversion about a small sphere in the universe. Scientists call this the Big Bang theory.
When Gauss plays Ehrenfeucht-Fraïssé game, he always wins.
The fact that Gauss is the greatest mathematician since antiquity is actually a theorem - A theorem proven by none other than one Carl Friedrich Gauss.
A typical human brain has a magnetic field of 10^-9 to 10^-8 Gauss. The unit Gauss was invented to describe the magnetic field of Gauss' brain. Coincidence? I think not.
The backward heat equation well-poses itself for Gauss.
Gauss can exactly determine the position and the momentum of a particle with absolute accuracy!
Gauss can find non-cyclic Abelian groups of order n where n does not have repeating prime factors.
Mathematics is invented by Gauss for others to discover.

The continuum hypothesis is independent from ZFC because Gauss thought it is more fun to have two theories there.
Gauss proved Goldbach's Conjecture by checking each case.
Gauss can see all 11 dimensions and can create more whenever he wants.
Gauss can differentiate e^x with respect to x down to zero.  
Gauss solved the Twin Prime Conjecture by counting all of the Twin Primes until he found infinitely many.
There are no theorems, just a list of propositions Gauss allows to be true.
If Carl Gauss tells you he's lying, you better believe it.
Each of Gauss's fingerprints contains a proof of quadratic reciprocity.
Gauss only took breaks from proving theorems to invent new algebras.
Gauss was once bored on a rainy Thursday night, so using only the nand operator, he re-derived all of modern mathematics.
Gauss proved the classification theorem of finite simple groups on less than ten pages. He then decided that his approach was rather obvious and didn't proceed to publish it.
Gauss checked the infinity of primes by counting them, starting from the last.
Gauss can prove two theorems with one proof.
The halting problem didn't exist until Gauss made a turing machine that halts only when he wants it to.
For Gauss, continuity implies differentiability.
Gauss can get to the other side of a Möbius strip.
It's unbelievable that some people compare Gauss to God. I mean, He's cool and all, but he's no Gauss...
Gauss can construct a pair of orthogonal Latin squares of order 6.
Gauss discovered non-euclidean geometry, but did not publish it, holding mathematics back for half a century (this one is actually true!)
Gauss can read the Zodiac 340 cipher as in plain text, he just didn't publish the solution in order to save fun for us people.
Gauss knows the question to the answer 42.
Gauss has never lost or even drawn a game of tic tac toe even against the best computer program.
Hilbert couldn't get a room at Gauss' Grand Hotel...it was booked solid.
gauss can count until pi with his fingers

Mathematicians often leave proofs as an exercise for the reader; Gauss leaves his proofs as an exercise for God. 
Chuck Norris learned from Gauss how to count up to infinity.
Gauss knows which Turing machines halt, because they have to ask him for permission first.
Carl Gauss can honestly say he's lying.
Gauss can construct a regular (a+ib)-gon for any a,b in R using just a straight-edge and compass.
When Gauss tells you that he’s lying, he’s telling the truth.
All butterflies dream that they are Gauss
Gauss can recite all the digite of pi - backwards.
Gauss builds the Mandelbrot set with ruler and compass.
When Gauss plays as player A, the player A has the winning strategy. When Gauss plays as player B, the player B has the winning strategy.
Gauss once chopped up a pea, and reassembled it into a sun.
Gauss solved the Kobayashi Maru, without cheating.
No one respected Riemann until Gauss taught him a trick how to make conditionally convergent series converge to any limit.
Gauss can colour any given map such that no two adjacent areas share a colour, using only three colours.
Whenever Gauss played tennis, he made sure first to comb all the fur on the ball smoothly.
Gauss doesn't need any axioms to prove theorems.
Gauss can both pet and not pet Schrödinger's cat at the same time. 
As a child, Gauss was instructed to sum the numbers from 1 to 100. He did this by summing the infinite series and then subtracting off every integer greater than 100, one by one, in his head.
Gauss is neither a Frequentist nor a Bayesian. For Gauss, the probability is always 1.
Gauss's ant can escape Langton's highway.
Gauss can run bogosort in constant time.
Unbounded sequences converge when Gauss is around. 
Gauss once proved that 1+1=2 exhibiting a counterexample for any other case.
When Gauss integrates he doesn't need to add a constant.
Not only does Gauss' general proof of Fermat's Last Theorem use only elementary arithmetic, it uses only minuses.
To win a bet, Gauss once throw darts uniformly at random onto the real number line and hit only rational numbers.
After reading a Gauss textbook, Maxwell decided to retire and dedicate its life to coffee.
Gauss can find a perfect cube larger than 8 in Fibonacci Sequence.
Gauss can trisect an angle with a straightedge and compass.
Gauss was annoyed by the acoustic disturbance while he was working. To reduce it he invented gaussian noise.
For Gauss, every game is determined... It doesn't matter if it is finite or not...
Gauss proved that the Mandelbrot Set is locally connected by drawing the boundary by hand.
Actually, Gauss knows the orbit of an Asteroid after only one measurement.
Gauss can count to aleph-one.
Gauss can solve Hume's problem of induction.
For Gauss, arithmetic is consistent AND complete.
L'Hôpital's rule was invented because only Gauss can multiply infinity by zero.
Gauss knows whether the set of all things that don't contain themselves contains itself.
Gauss wins a car no matter what door he opens.
Gauss can comb the hair on a bowling ball.
Once in his free time, Gauss found about a hundred distinct imaginary numbers on the real line.
Protons suffered an emotional breakdown.  Gauss said "keep it together" and they haven't decayed since.
Gauss doesn't need to solve the Halting Problem — Turing machines halt whenever Gauss tells them to.
Gauss can construct an atomic formula consisting solely of quantifiers and logical connectives.
Andrew Wiles found Gauss's old school book, and copied off it to give us Fermat's Last Theorem
Gauss can perfectly calculate Chaitin's constants.
Gauss can calculate the determinant of a non-square matrix
"I couldn't find a counterexample" is an admissible mathematical proof if it's written by Gauss.
Gauss used induction with the real numbers. And it worked
Computer told Gauss the Eight-queens Puzzle has 92 answers,then Gauss showed it the 93rd one
The only thing Fermat could really prove is that Gauss is always correct.
Gauss can divide by zero.
Gauss plays basketball with a Riemann sphere.
When Gauss breaks a magnet he ends up with two monopoles
Gauss can measure the random quantum fluctuation energy in the fabric of space-time.
Gauss can calculate the square root of -1 ... with a slide rule.
Gauss can measure the total Entropy in the universe
Gauss classified all finite simple groups in the space Fermat left in the margin.
Gauss doesn't always divide by zero, but when he does, he gets the answer.
Fermat once made Gauss angry. The result - Fermat’s Last Theorem.
Gauss had a theory of arithmetic that was consistent and complete. Also, he proved the incompleteness theorems. When God uttered "But ... isn't there a contradic-" Gauss disproved his existence.
It's acceptable when Carl Gauss uses circular reasoning. (I know because he told me.)
Gauss can solve Towers of Hanoi in  polynomial time.
Gauss can calculate the solution to the Boolean satisfiability problem in O(1) time.
Gauss knows whether the glass is half-full or half-empty.
Gauss taught himself to square the circle in second grade. By third grade, he didn't even need the straightedge or compass. By fourth grade, he didn't even need the pencil. By the time he got his first PhD in fifth grade, he didn't even need the circle.
"Gauß's theorem" is a pleonasm.
Gauss can find the cross product of two vectors  in any n dimensional space.
If Gauss had to walk 100 metres, and half the remaining distance, then half the remaining distance again, and so on, he'd get there.
Once, Gauss was stumped by a theorem that he couldn't prove. This was enough evidence for Godel.
when gauss goes stargazing he sees the end of the universe
Gauss can vertex color every graph using a greedy algorithm in O(1) time.
Gauss chooses his lotto numbers from an undecidable set.
It only takes Gauss 4 minutes to sing “Aleph-Null Bottles of Beer on the Wall”.
Gauss doesn't understand stochastic processes because he can predict random numbers.  
When Carl Friedrich Gauss adds one, his number doesn't increase, all other numbers become smaller.
Gauss's watch can tell whether a Turing machine will halt or not.
Parallel lines intersect anywhere Gauss wants them to.
Gauss actually disproved the clause: "Gauss cannot prove that this clause is true".
God created the integers.  The rest is the work of Gauss.
Gauss can perform any algorithm in a polynomial number of Gauss-steps.
Gauss doesn't recognize complex numbers, they're all simple to him.  
Gauss knows if Schrödinger's cat is alive or dead, and also what collar it wears
Gauss never runs out of room in the margin.
Heisenberg came up with the Uncertainty Principle because he was not as certain as Gauss.
Gauss also discovered Galois Theory, but also won a duel, AND got the girl. Take that, Evariste!
Gauss can take the cross product of a vector and a scalar.
Gauss can grow corn in Z6
Gauss can square the circle and then transform it into the hyper-sphere.
Gauss can fill a Klein bottle.
If G is the set of theorems Gauss proved, then the powerset of G contains less elements than G.
Soon, infinity cannot exist any longer. Even the largest numbers cannot run away from Gauss for ever.
Gauss can break RSA, in his head.
When Gauss was thirsty, he used Banach–Tarski paradox to get more orange juice.
Gauss stopped doing mathematics after he wrote proved more than aleph-null theorems, but before he proved aleph-one of them.
The flaw in Godel's impossibility theorem is that he forgot to account for the existence of Carl Gauss.
God does not play dice with the universe, but Gauss does.
"Only two things are infinite, human stupidity and Gauss' intellect , and I'm not sure about human stupidity" - Albert Einstein
Asking Gauss whether or not a statement is true or false constitutes a rigorous proof
Gauss can write out A(6,3) in decimal on an imaginary chalkboard in his head.
The God Particle is actually nature's tribute to Gauss
Gauss is an exclusive member of an empty set.
Gauss knew the general solution to the n-body problem.
Gauss knows the topological difference between a doughnut and a coffee cup.
Gauss can find eigen-vectors of a rotation matrix.
Gauss once got lost in a forest. So he added a few edges and reduced the forest to a single tree.
Gauss knows Alice and Bob's shared secret. 
Gauss's fundamental group is the monster group.
Gauss can solve problems in time O(0).
Gauss shaves both himself and Bertrand Russell.
Gauss can prove by induction that all horses are of the same color.
Gauss once played himself in a zero-sum game and won $50.
Some numbers are transcendental because Gauss didn't think they were rational enough.
Gauss didn't need to unify quantum mechanics and general relativity. He got the right theory from the start.
Gauss keeps monster sets as pets
An elegant proof is one line long. Gauss' elegant proofs are one word long.
It's no secret Gauss was a child prodigy; his mother's womb inspired the divergence theorem.
Gauss once simultaneously diagonalized all n by n matrices.
When Gauß died, he did not leave any conjectures but excersises.
Entropy naturally reverses itself around Gauss. It is the universe's way of looking busy when he's around.
Gauss can differentiate a constant and get a variable.
Gauss saved the rainforest by omitting "qed" at the end of proofs.
Gauss had to invent a new number to count his proofs: Aleph-Gauss.
Gauss can take an arbitrary loop on the surface of a torus and shrink it to a point. 
Gauss can numerically compute a Lesbesgue integral.
A real number is constructible with straightedge and compass if and only if Gauss never felt like freehanding it.
Gauss never proved a theorem, they're all lemmas for him.
God once said he'd end the world after someone solves the Tower of Hanoi problem containing 64 pegs. Gauss solved it in about a hundred steps just to prove that God was kidding.
Gauss can calculate the moments of the Cauchy-Lorentz distribution.
Gauss once started falling asleep in his complex analysis class. The result…singularities.
Gauss prefers to work with matrices with an irrational number of entries. 
Gauss knows the momentum and position of everything at all times.
At night, theorems sit around the campfire and tell stories about Gauss .
Gauss never understood the concept of NP problems because the first feasible solution he uses is always the optimum.
If Gauss attempts to solve an equation for which there is no solution, mathematics will change to allow one. This is why fractions and irrational, negative and imaginary numbers exist.
A prime number is a number divisible only by one, itself and Gauss
Gauss can shave with Occam's razor.
Gauss could solve an n-dimensional Rubik hypercube. He tried just once.
The divergence of a magnetic field is only 0 because Gauss grew tired of silly variables.
Gauss knows of an efficient way of factoring large numbers into nontrivial primes, but gets such a laugh out of the general agreement of P != NP that he won't tell anybody.
Gauss found inconsistencies in Godel's proof
Erdös used to say that he knew 37 different proofs of the Pythagorean Theorem.  Gauss knew 37 different proofs of the Riemann hypothesis, which he posed as an exercise to Bernhard Riemann while on his deathbed.
Gauss has proven the Hodge Conjecture. With a Spork. 
Gauss can fill each of m pigeonholes with n pigeons such that no hole contains more than one pigeon, regardless of whether m > n.
Give Gauss a solid place to stand and he'll move the universe
The annihilator of a ring is actually a finisher wrestling move developed by Gauss.
You know that theorem you just proved in your thesis? 
Gauss already proved it 200 years ago.
Gauss made the Kessel Run in one parsec.
They say Riemann is the name Gauss used to publish some unsatisfied papers. 
Gauss has already solved the infinity-body problem.
Gauss can square the circle and trisecate the angle with compass and straightedge
Gauss can choose one sock from infinity pairs without the Axiom of Choice.
Gauss uses the squeeze theorem on oranges whenever he wants juice.  
Watching Riemann fail in proving his famous conjecture, Gauss got so angry that he smashed the unit interval in pieces. The result is nowadays known as the "Cantor Set".
Gauss never needs to resort to a Martingale strategy while gambling. He wins every bet.
Gauss once proved an axiom, but he didn't like it. So he disproved it. 
Gauss's law actually states that everything in an enclosed surface has already been proven by Gauss.  
When Gauss enters a tug of war the rope goes perfectly taut
G.Perelman didn't accept Fields medal since he felt it would be unfair for him to take credit for the proof Of Poincare conjecture he found in one of Gauss unpublished notebooks.
If you fire an electron at a screen with two slits in it and a Gauss on the other side the electron refuses to go through either slit
For gauss, correlation implies causation.
Riemann stole a proof from Gauss' book, but he couldn't understand it and called it Riemann's hypothesis. 
When Gauss does Gaussian elimination, it takes O(N). If he pivots, it takes O(log(N)).
If you prove a theorem and Gauss proves a theorem, Gauss has proven more theorems than you.
Gauss doesn't sort, he raises one eyebrow, and arrays sort themselves out in constant time, and throw themselves at his feet, crying for mercy.
After seven and a half million years of calculation, Deep Thought gave up and asked Gauss for the answer.
Hilbert put forward 23 unsolved problems because he hadn't properly read Gauss' notebooks.
The universe isn't expanding, it is just making more room for Gauss's ideas
Gauss referred to mathematics as the "queen of the sciences." Guess who is the king? 
Gauss did not prove theorems, he simply stared at them until they yielded their solutions.
Gauss can choose an element in every subset of the real line.
Gauss can trisect any angle while closing his eyes.
Gauss drinks his beer from a Klein bottle.
Only Gauss knows whether Schrodinger's cat is dead or alive.  
One time, Gauss solved the general quintic equation in radicals, but he decided we weren't worthy of the solution.