A little script for welcoming you to your newly-opened terminal. Targeted at Ubuntu.

.welcome.sh

#!/bin/bash

BLUE="\033[0;34m"
LBLUE="\033[1;34m"
GRAY="\033[1;30m"
NC="\033[00m"

spacing="       $GRAY█$NC  "

case $(date +%u) in
1)
	day=Monday
	;;
2)
	day=Tuesday
	;;
3)
	day=Wednesday
	;;
4)
	day=Thursday
	;;
5)
	day=Friday
	;;
6)
	day=Saturday
	;;
7)
	day=Sunday
	;;
esac

ruptime=$(uptime | sed 's/.*up \([^,]*\), .*/\1/')
echo -e "$spacing"
echo -e "${spacing}Welcome, $USER"
echo -e "${spacing}$(date +'%m/%d/%Y') at $(date +'%I:%M %P')"
echo -e "${spacing}Today is $day"
echo -e "$spacing"
echo -e "${spacing}${LBLUE}Uptime     :$NC $ruptime"
echo -en "${spacing}${LBLUE}Load       :$NC "
cat /proc/loadavg | awk '{print $1 " " $2 " " $3}'

function updateip() {
	ip=$(curl --silent http://what-is-my-ip.net/?text)
	echo "$ip|$(iwgetid -r)" > .lastip
}

# Cache the last IP address, fetching the latest if wireless access point has
# changed.
if [ -e ".lastip" ]; then
	lastip=$(cat .lastip)
	savedip=$(echo $lastip | cut -d \| -f 1)
	savedssid=$(echo $lastip | cut -d \| -f 2)
	ssid=$(iwgetid -r)
	if [ "$ssid" != "$savedssid" ]; then
		updateip
	else
		ip=$savedip
	fi
else
	updateip
fi
echo -e "${spacing}${LBLUE}IP Address :$NC $ip"

# Get system updates
hasupdate=false
while read l; do
	echo -e "${spacing}$l"
	hasupdate=true
done </var/lib/update-notifier/updates-available
if [ !$hasupdate ]; then
	echo -e "${spacing}There are no updates available."
	echo -e "$spacing"
fi
echo