The life of an Eggs Developer

eggsDeveloper.js

/**
 * Become an eggs developer, look at cats, work on great projects, increase enjoyment!
 * @returns {EggsDeveloper}
 * @constructor
 */
var EggsDeveloper = function(){ return this; };

EggsDeveloper.prototype = {
	startDay: function(){
		var me = this;

		me.coffee = 0;
		me.magic = 0;
		me.enjoyment = 0;
		me.catsViewed = 0;
		me.caffeineSufficient = false;
		me.finished = false;
		me.hungry = false;

		if (!me.caffeineSufficient) me.drinkCoffee();
		else me.makeMagic();
	},
	drinkCoffee: function(){
		var me = this;
		while (!me.caffeineSufficient){
			me.coffee++; // [caffeine intensifies]
			me.enjoyment++;
			me.caffeineSufficient = (me.coffee > 3);
			console.log('Coffee: '+ me.coffee + ' Caffeine Sufficient:' + me.caffeineSufficient + ' Enjoyment:' + me.enjoyment);
		}
		me.makeMagic();
	},
	makeMagic: function(){
		var me = this;
		while (!me.hungry && !me.finished && me.caffeineSufficient){
			me.magic++; // [coding intensifies]
			me.catsViewed++; // [reddit intensifies]
			me.enjoyment++;
			me.hungry = (me.magic == 50);
			me.finished = (me.magic == 100);
			me.caffeineSufficient = !((me.magic == 25) || (me.magic == 75) );
			console.log('Magic: '+ me.magic + ' Cats:' + me.catsViewed + ' Enjoyment:' + me.enjoyment);
		}
		if (me.hungry) me.eat();
		if (me.finished) me.finish();
		if (!me.caffeineSufficient) me.drinkCoffee();
	},
	eat: function(){
		var me = this,
			prepared = true,
			nutritious = true;
		if (prepared && nutritious) {
			me.hungry = false; // [hunger decreases]
			me.enjoyment += 50;
			console.log('Hungry: '+ me.hungry + ' Enjoyment:' + me.enjoyment);
			me.socialize();
		}
		me.makeMagic();
	},
	finish: function(){
		var me = this;
		me.socialize();
		// setTimeout(me.startDay, 86400000); // [life intensifies]
	},
	socialize: function(){
		var me = this;
		me.havingAConversation = true; // [stress decreases]
		me.beer = (new Date().getHours() > 15);	// [relaxation intensifies]
		me.relaxed = true;
		me.enjoyment += 50;
		console.log('Relaxed: '+ me.relaxed + ' Enjoyment:' + me.enjoyment + ' Beer: '+ me.beer);
	}
};

var you = new EggsDeveloper();
you.startDay();