A #fun #javascript #bookmarklet : simulate crazy capslock

CrazyReturn.js

(function(){
	
	// UTILS
	var capslocked = function( event ) {
	
		// UTILS
		var key_handler = function( event ) {
			
			// UTILS
			var random_value = function( min, max ) {
				return Math.floor( Math.random( ) * max + min );
			}
			var string_repeat = function( string, nb_repeat ) {
				var str = string;
				for ( var i=1; i<nb_repeat; i++ ) str += string;
				return str;
			}
			var insert_string = function( textarea, string ) {
				var text = textarea.value;
				text = text.substring( 0, textarea.selectionStart ) + string + text.substring( textarea.selectionEnd );
				var new_index = textarea.selectionStart + string.length;
				textarea.value = text;
				textarea.setSelectionRange( new_index, new_index );
				return true;
			}
			var event_key = function( event ) {
				return event.keyCode ? event.keyCode : event.charCode ? event.charCode : event.which;
			}
		
			// LOGIC
			var key = event_key( event );
			var char = String.fromCharCode( key );
			
			if ( ! event.ctrlKey && ! event.altKey ) {
				if ( key >= 65 && key <= 90 ) {
					return insert_string( textarea, char );
				}
				if ( char == ' ' ) {
					return insert_string( textarea, string_repeat( ' ', random_value( 1, 3) ) );
				}
				if ( key == 190 || key == 188 || key == 186 || key == 49 ) {
					return insert_string( textarea, ' ' + string_repeat( '!', random_value( 2, 5) ) );
				}
			}
		}

		// LOGIC
		var textarea = event.target;
		var top = textarea.scrollTop; // for anti-scroll in firefox
		var handled = key_handler( event );
		if ( handled ) {
			event.returnValue = false;
			event.preventDefault();
			textarea.scrollTop = top;
			return false;
		}
		return true;
	};
	
	// LOGIC
	var textareas = document.getElementsByTagName( 'textarea' );
	for (var i=0; i<textareas.length; i++) {
		textareas[ i ].onkeydown = capslocked;
	}
	var inputs = document.getElementsByTagName( 'input' );
	for (var i=0; i<inputs.length; i++) {
		inputs[ i ].onkeydown = capslocked;
	}

})();