alexaJokes.py

from random import randint

# --------------- Helpers that build all of the responses ----------------------
th = []


def populate():
    global th
    th.append("Some kids pee their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can pee his name into concrete.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits")
    th.append("Chuck Norris calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.")
    th.append("Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through dry land.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris once shot an enemy plane down with his finger by yelling, Bang!")
    th.append("Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.")
    th.append("The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris once heard that nothing can kill him, so he tracked down nothing and killed it.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris makes fire by rubbing 2 ice cubes together.")
    th.append("When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.")
    th.append("Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris can make a happy meal cry.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris makes onions cry.")
    th.append("Mistakes learn from Chuck Norris")
    th.append("Chuck Norris can dial your phone number on the microwave.")
    th.append("Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch. He decides what time it is.")
    th.append("The Incredible Hulk is Green because he envies Chuck Norris")
    th.append("Chuck Norris recorded a 6 hour vine video and uploaded it in 6 seconds")
    th.append("Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.")
    th.append("When Chuck Norris turned 18, his parents moved out.")

def build_speechlet_response(title, output, card_text, reprompt_text, should_end_session):
    return {
        'outputSpeech': {
            'type': 'PlainText',
            'text': output
        },
        'card': {
            'type': 'Simple',
            'title': "" + title,
            'content': "" + card_text
        },
        'reprompt': {
            'outputSpeech': {
                'type': 'PlainText',
                'text': reprompt_text
            }
        },
        'shouldEndSession': should_end_session
    }


def build_response(session_attributes, speechlet_response):
    return {
        'version': '1.0',
        'sessionAttributes': session_attributes,
        'response': speechlet_response
    }


# --------------- Functions that control the skill's behavior ------------------

def tellFact():
    session_attributes = {}
    num  = randint(0, len(th) - 1)
    fact_num = str(num+1)
    card_title = "Chuck Norris Fan Fact #" + fact_num +". "
    card_text = th[num]
    speech_output = card_title + card_text 

    should_end_session = True
    return build_response(session_attributes, build_speechlet_response(
        card_title, speech_output,card_text, "", should_end_session))


def initialize():
    return tellFact()



# --------------- Events ------------------



def on_launch(launch_request, session):
    populate()
    return initialize()


def on_intent(intent_request, session):
    intent = intent_request['intent']
    intent_name = intent_request['intent']['name']

    if intent_name == "TellFact":
        return tellFact()
    else:
        raise ValueError("Invalid intent")


# --------------- Main handler ------------------

def lambda_handler(event, context):
    application_id = event['session']['application']['applicationId']

    if (application_id != "amzn1.ask.skill.cc041990-0e05-4794-8c7a-8e265ea8dd86"):
        raise ValueError("Invalid Application ID")
        
    if event['request']['type'] == "LaunchRequest":
        return on_launch(event['request'], event['session'])
    elif event['request']['type'] == "IntentRequest":
        return on_intent(event['request'], event['session'])