There's a new Maid of Void named 'Skitis' in town, originally hailing from Alternia. She has Magenta blood and isn't bigoted, thankfully. She is very generous, I don't believe we will have any issues with her. Also her wings look very nice. There was a small altercation between me, her, and the Corn Mage of Light when I fell out of a tree while taking notes. Fortunately it all worked out, and I was able to get an interview with her.
Interview Transcription: [T/L Note: Skitis' dialogue was written in Alternian and Jill's was written in Consort Alternian.]
Jill: What is your Mythological Role?
Skitis: Maid of Void
Skitis: Wait how did you know Alternian?
Jill: Because of the SGRUB sessions. I'm asking the questions here though.
Skitis: Alright, well, uh, what's the next question?
Jill: What is your blood color?
Skitis: My blood colour?
Jill: To gauge how bigoted you might be from Hemospectrum privilege.
Skitis: I'm a fuchsia blood. However I hate the hemospectrum. I used to hide it before I played The Game.
Jill: So you were a rebel and don't hold those bigoted views. That's a relief, good to hear you're not a threat.
Jill: Were you successful in making a new Universe when you played SGRUB?
Skitis: ...can't remember yet.
Skitis: But something tells me... Probably?
Jill: Ah. So you have Amnesia?
Skitis: Yes.
Jill: Do you have any strong feelings in regards to Consorts?
Skitis: Overall consorts and kind and mean well, but misunderstandings and miscommunications can cause problems. {Editor's Note: Presumably she meant 'consorts are.' It appears she mispoke.}
Skitis: Like feeding my friend rocks because they were thought to be healing, even though they needed to be processed first.
Jill: nodding SGRUB is very limiting on our ability to communicate. It's why we developed the Consort language within Gene to improve our ability to communicate expansive concepts that are impossible in a single language. Pencil breaks, pulls out the backup blue crayon
Skitis: Uh, do you need a pen or something?
Jill: Newsroom policy doesn't allow Reporters to use pens. Only Editors can use them to keep the work done on article manuscripts clear for future reference.
Skitis: "The fuck? I might have a pencil too..." {Editor's note: A communication error occured here, as the Alternian word used translates literally to 'Forbidden by Imperial Decree'}
Skitis: uncaptchalogues a pencil
Jill: nods, takes it, and puts away the backup blue crayon
Skitis: What else would you like to know?
Jill: Do you have any relationships with the gods we already know? {Editor's note: Alternian word 'Quadrants' caused another miscommunication, causing her to interpret it as asking about close personal relationships with the other players in her session.}
Skitis: Uh... Honestly, I didn't have any quads I remember. As for my coplayers... I don't know where they are. I hope they're safe.
Jill: realizes there's nothing to be done about the miscommunication, nods Is anything else you would like to tell the readers back home?
Skitis: visibly nervous I'm not sure. I'm not good at this stuff. Uh. It's nice to be here? I hope I get to meet more nice people?
Jill: Good luck in that endeavor. It was nice to meet you. offers handshake, puts away notepad, holds pencil Do you want this back?
Skitis: shakes hands You can keep the pencil.
Jill: Okay puts it away, leaves
$RUDY has risen in value by 20% after announcing that their Pokemon Saddle product will soon be available in Growlithe and Houndour sizes.
$KEK has fallen .1% after a fire at their processing facility in HornWiggleWaggle caused 80 injuries and two deaths. The injured are currently being treated by a KekCo Health Care team for a startling No Money.
$NEONCAS has returned to its pre-dungeon price, in accordance with the reopening of the historic Indigo Treasure Casino.
$KATIE has fallen 6% due to shareholder frustration with the long dispute with Plit authorities.
$JINGTOYS has risen a sharp 50% at the sudden announcement that they will be selling decorations for this year's Halloween celebration.
$OBAMA has fallen 20% as he has yet to make a statement on 'SODA!'
$POKECENTER has continued to hold a steady value.
$PARK has risen an astounding 1000% at the report that they will finally be soft opening soon.
$TWRC has risen 59.718% at the news that a Consort translation of the Great Dex is in development.
[T/L Note: The consort stock market just kinda happens to you. Most of the tickers listed here have not been acknowledged by those they represent.]
[T/L Note: Jrge is a volunteer at the Unity Pokemon Ranch. The Jr. Pokemon Researcher title is apparently self-given.]
A differently colored Spinark has been spotted on Desertia, apparently belonging to the robot named KAZ. It is a dark sandy brown color instead of the normal green. This is believed to be an adaption for camoflage in the Desertian Sand.
White Vulpix have also been spotted coming out of hibernation as we enter the fall season. So anyone looking to add one to their team should keep their eyes peeled for the icy foxes!
A scrap of paper and some mysterious petals were discovered recently in a alleyway of Neon City. The paper had a note written by the Dog Witch of Time, stating an intent to learn how to be a Gym leader at Umbal City and then establish a Gym in Neon. More on this situation as it develops.
Bugsnax: 0/10, not as bug flavored as hoped.
Game tasted like normal game. Very disappointing.
Disc was incompatible with KekStation 5, showing a piracy message. I assumed this meant iy needed to be eaten. Apparently this was wrong and I couldn't get a refund. I recommend putting this warning on packaging next tome. Cover art looks nice though.