One of the great things about PHP is you don't have the follow the rules when hacking stuff together. This makes map-building work easy to type up. However, since Golang there isn't much reason to use PHP anymore. Golang exceeds in every area from the stdlib to the speed and security of the application.

madness.php

<?php

// Type casting is easy on weak languages
$a =  (object) (array) (object) (array) (object) ["foo" => "bar"];

// PHP will happily iterate over an object (like Javascript)
foreach($a as $key => $value) {
  print "$key = $value" . PHP_EOL;
}

$foo = "foo";
$b = (array) $a;

// Variable variable access - even inside a string!
print $a->$$foo . " = {$a->$foo} = $b[$foo]" . PHP_EOL;

// Look at this Golang! No need for a new variable to prevent confusion!
$a = ['foo' => [1,2,3]];

// More variable variables
$alias = "a";
${$alias}[$foo][] = 4;

// Look a temp function result is functioning as a variable variable!
${chr(97)}[$foo][] = 5;

print_r($a);