gistfile1.txt

Quru's rules of programming
 
1)   It's either sunlight or code!
2)   The best time to save was a few seconds ago.
2b)  The best time to commit to the repository will be after you deleted
     _these_ debug messages.
3)   If the comment '/*hideous code from here to the end of file*/' is needed,
     make sure that it does not belong in the first line.
3b)  or the line after the includes, smartarse!
4)   Allocate a ressource, deallocate it, then implement actual funtionality
     -- or wonder why your system OOMs.
5)   Rejistanian, Esperanto, Turkish, Lajik, and Klingon are no suitable
     languages for comments
5b)  Neither is German or English if you have blood in your caffeine stream. 
6)   That condition, which you called impossible? It just happened!
7)   Using dynamic lists to solve one problem either solves it or keeps you 
     up until morning to find the hidden bug. But then, it's your time!
8)   It is in the standard libraries -- and the version there _works_!
9)   The trickier the code, the higher the CrackAttack score, c'est la vie.
10)  There is a special place in hell for the dirty trick you just used. Yes,
     I mean _that_ dirty trick.
11)  If Skynet was written in Forth it would not try to enslave humanity. At
    some point, the order of elements on the stack would be wrong and it would crash.
11b) If it was written in Java, it would attempt to destroy humanity so
     slowly that it would be easily defeated
12)  Kiu is neither a suitable name for a function nor a variable.
12b) Quux is not a suitable name for _anything_!
13)  Subtlety has no place in reporting errors during development. Kill
     that damn application so you are forced to handle the bug first!  
14)  If you think no user can be just that stupid, you are very, very naive.