- Oh my god, we're just straight up opening the show with a Q episode. This is not off to a strong start, you guys.
- I forgot how ridiculous it was to have a straight up telepath on Star Trek. What the hell, Deanna Troi?
- People hate Wesley Crusher so much. I am certain that I am going to find out why, soon.
- The amount of this pilot devoted to people just wandering around expositing all over the damn place is incredible. Incredible.
- Post-Atomic Earth is pretty dystopian. Guards had guns for hands and crayon packets on their chests.
- It's Bones! Doc McCoy is still a cranky old shithead after all of these years.
- This episode is incredibly slow.
- If you're not happy in your alliance with the Federation, you're going to have a pretty rough time with the Ferengi, aliens-of-the-week
- Picard just suggested that the Ferengi would eat the aliens-of-the-week. I take it that the Ferengi are not as well established in TnG as they are in DS9. either that or Picard is joking.
- Riker just barges in on Data in the holodeck. Barging in on people in the Holodeck seems like a bad idea.
- Don't be a dick to the Holodeck, Data.
- Hate for Wesley.... increasing. "Don't jump there?" immediately jumps there -splash-
- Wait, so holodeck water is real water?
- "But Captain Picard is a pain, isn't he?". Eat a dick, Wesley. You've had one sentence worth of interaction with him and he was polite.
- Perhaps you'd like to stack up some phone books and let Wesley drive the ship a bit?
- Oh god, you're actually doing it.
- What did I JUST tell you about not touching anything, you little shit?
- The mysterious ship is actually... a space jellyfish!
- ugh Deanna Troi having feelings all over the place.
- UGH
- UUUUUGH
- Data: "Indications of what humans would call... 'a wild party?'". Is there an android term for a wild party that he decided not to use?
- It is clearly much too cold to survive in the crew quarters, but Geordi LaForge is Canadian, so the cold doesn't even bother him.
- Clearly the problem is that the other ship cracked a window and turned off the heat, in space, which caused them all to die. So what's Riker and Geordi breathing? Ham?
- Data, Riker, and Geordi all visited the mystery death ship, but the doctor only quarantines Geordi, because the doctor does not understand how quarantines work.
- Fever-Geordi just walks out of quarantine, because (again) the doctor does not understand how quarantines work.
- "Where's Geordi?" - literally ONE EPISODE AGO the ship demonstrated its ability to announce where any of its occupants are at any given moment.
- The captain and a bunch of team members visit Geordi in the sick bay. Ok, I'm going to stop going on about how bad they are at quarantines on the Enterprise.
- The security officer who's face Geordi was touching is now wandering around the ship touching other people.
- I know a lot of people either had a crush on Deanna Troi or Dr. Crusher. Why not Tasha Yar? She is way hotter than either of them.
- Oh. I see. Thanks for spoiling that for me, Wikipedia.
- There's evidence that the "disease" is spreading. Now would be a great time to start enacting some quarantine protocols.
- Wesley Crusher, you fucker. After mutineering and declaring himself captain, Wesley's first edict is "more dessert'.
- "I am programmed in multiple techniques. A broad variety of pleasuring". Oh, Data, you smooth dog.
- Riker was exposed to this stuff before anybody else but he still seems fine.
- Geordi: "I've never seen a rainbow." Not even a READING Rainbow?
- Are you suggesting water mutates?
- Fully 28 minutes into the episode, Dr. Crusher first realizes that she needs to quarantine some fuckers.
- It's only taken 2 episodes and I already hate Wesley Crusher more than anything.
- Security on this ship is terrible. There should be someone on this ship, with a gun, able to deal with mutineers.
- Data wasn't infected by being on the ship, but he was infected by banging Tasha Yar.
- Brent Spiner leaning on nothing and falling over is a brilliant piece of physical comedy.
- Oh no! A giant baked potato wrapped in golden tin foil is hurtling towards the ship!
- oh great, Wesley saved the day by being better at engineering than the trained engineers
- Beverly Crusher is pretty smug about her boy saving the day, considering how her boy mutinied and almost killed everybody on the ship. Did they all just forget that this is mostly his fault?
- Yes. Yes they did forget that, apparently.
- The internet called this one of the worst extant episodes of TnG. Let's find out!
- Their costumes are patently ridiculous.
- "A woman? Your chief of security?"
- Tasha Yar is worst diplomat.
- Why are they giving people ancient gifts? This gift is nowhere near as good as a modern vaccine.
- Tasha Yar's Gi is just a bathrobe, as far as I can tell.
- Oh my god oh my god is this going to be a Holodeck Thing Becomes Real episode? Please?
- Lady-yoink!
- Subtle racism? Or overt racism?
- Ooh, no, it was a 'fight to the death' epsiode all along!
- This episode was mega dumb. Stupid dumb. Not even in a fun way.
- Ferengi! eeeeeeee
- Picard's knowledge of four-hundred year old flag design is impressive.
- Geordi's "oo-weee!" of excitement was ... just terrible.
- "They've got us trapped." "Why don't we just turn the warp drive up to max?" "Sounds great."
- "They're clearly much more advanced than we are. Let's start making demands!"
- Data gets stuck in a Chinese finger-trap. This will doubtless be a solution to a problem later on in the episode.
- This Ferengi talks like a pirate
- This Ferengi knows a lot of English words, but not 'swap', a word that means 'trade'. A Ferengi, mind you.
- This Ferengi does not observe proper Skype etiquette and spends the entirety of the argument pressed way way close to the camera.
- Welcome to the land of bad green screen and foam props!
- You're a nert.
- The Ferengi are travelling with their combat sausages, as usual
- FEDERATION VALUES