I want Square Cash to buy Google Wallet a nice red flemish ale. I want SCash to put his stuck up artiste bullshit aside, and GWallet to let down her inhibitions and have fun for a change. After a few rounds of Dutchess, bill splits, and cash exchanges, SCash grabs GWallets hand and takes her dancing. On the dancefloor, GWallet lets loose a little bit and notices SCash cash is quite handsome, despite the weird mustache and tweed vest. SCash suddenly realizes the subtle elegance of Gwallet's form, her dress, her figure, her smile, her eyes... the beauty missed by most is suddenly accessible at closer look. After progressively more and more sensual dances, GWallet makes the move and kisses SCash. It is a passionate, slow kiss. They don't know each other well, but they are what they each need. They go back to GWallet's place, which is much larger and nicer than SCash's -- despite SCash's sensitive insistence that "my minimalism is my art -- i live with only what I need". Back in the Googleplex, Gwallet and SCash escalate their passionate, torrid affair. SCash discovers the value of a lush, well-stocked home with thousands of servants, and a luxurious bed. Gwallet discovers the value of SCash's bold, assertive, relentless drive for perfection. Always going straight to the point, GWallet moves to skip the foreplay, but SCash, who appreciates the delicate importance of subtle user experience detail insists. GWallet and SCash begin their own slow, calculated search of each other, through the possibility space, experimenting towards billing system perfection. After many silent iterations, precision engineering meets artistic aesthetic; climax after unforgettable climax, the sex reaches sublime enlightenment. Despite prideful inadmission, the best each had ever had. In time they'll look back upon it as love making. In time -- in 9.023 months to be precise -- the beautiful, gorgeous product of their love would emerge. It would come into our lives easily and unobtrusively. It would solve every monetary exchange hurdle with masterful, dashing perfection. What the awkward clinkle hype was all about. What paypal's decade-long fumbling prophesied. The savior, the messiah of payment systems.
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Brilliant.
Google Wallet and Stripe Cash are just services, not people. Personifying, glorifying, and sexualizing them doesn't seem like a path to understanding either of them nor predicting or influencing their respective development long term.
@zmaril agreed, it's kinda gross.
That's funny coming from someone named @vomitcuddle.
I think you both should lighten up a little and look past the amusing sexualisation of a couple services and actually look at the point a bit. Granted, I'm not completely positive what that point is. I think it's something along the lines of "the best money management system should have SCash's excellent service* and GWallet's pretty interface*".
- I've never used either of these services. Thus, I cannot vouch for the validity of these staments.
So you want @stripe?
Hi @zmaril! :) -- don't seek to influence them long term. This came out of an email exchange with @ali01; he forced me to try Square Cash (I was reluctant, given how many services of this kind I already have...). I ended up really liking the experience, and found it complementary to Google Wallet: both services excel where the other fails. A short sentence making this simple point turned into a longer, funnier paragraph. Others found it funny too, and voila. Sometimes I attempt deep commentary, veiled in stories or metaphors. Not today.
That's funny coming from someone named @vomitcuddle.
@chall8908 hahah!
@mvanveen, this concerns p2p payment systems. AFAIK @stripe is for charging, not for personal p2p ledger-style payments (venmo, paypal, gwallet, scash, ...) . Though I'd like it to be :)
@jbenet: After many silent iterations, precision engineering meets artistic aesthetic
Here here
Lovely.