Javascript-like PHP syntax

javascript.php

<?php

class jObject {
	// Private

	private $__ = null;

	function __construct() {
		call_user_func_array(array($this, '__init'), func_get_args());
	}

	function __init() {
		$this->__ = func_get_args();
	}

	function __toString() {
		return '[object '.get_class($this).']';
	}
}

function jObject() {
	return new jObject();
}

class jArray extends jObject {
	// Private

	private $__ = array();

	function __init() {
		call_user_func_array(array($this, 'push'), func_get_args());
	}

	function __toString () {
		return implode(',', $this->__);
	}

	function __get($property) {
		if ($property === 'length') return count($this->__);

		if ($property > -1) return $this->__[$property];

		return $this->$property;
	}

	function __set($property, $value) {
		if ($property > -1) return $this->__[$property] = $value;

		return $this->$property = $value;
	}

	// Public

	function concat() {
		return call_user_func_array(array($this, '__construct'), array_merge($this->__, func_get_args()));
	}

	function each($callback) {
		foreach ($this->__ as $index => $value) call_user_func_array($callback, array($value, $index, &$this->__));

		return $this;
	}

	function filter($callback) {
		$array = new self;

		foreach ($this->__ as $index => $value) {
			if (call_user_func_array($callback, array($value, $index, &$this->__))) {
				$array->push($value);
			}
		}

		return $array;
	}

	function indexOf($element, $fromIndex = 0) {
		foreach ($this->__ as $index => $each) if ($index >= $fromIndex && $each == $element) return $index;

		return -1;
	}

	function join($separator = ',') {
		return implode($separator, $this->__);
	}

	function map($callback) {
		$array = new self;

		foreach ($this->__ as $index => $value) {
			$array->push(call_user_func_array($callback, array($value, $index, &$this->__)));
		}

		return $array;
	}

	function pop() {
		return array_splice($this->__, -1, 1, func_get_args())[0];
	}

	function push() {
		$args = func_get_args();

		foreach ($args as &$arg) {
			if (is_string($arg)) {
				array_push($this->__, new jString($arg));
			} elseif (is_array($arg)) {
				$array = new jArray();

				call_user_func_array(array($array, 'push'), $arg);

				array_push($this->__, $array);
			} else {
				array_push($this->__, $arg);
			}
		}
	}

	function shift() {
		return array_splice($this->__, 0, 1, func_get_args())[0];
	}

	function slice() {
		$array = new self;

		$args = array_replace(array(0, count($this->__)), func_get_args());
		$index = array_shift($args);
		$end = array_shift($args);

		call_user_func_array(array($array, 'push'), array_slice($this->__, $index, $end - $index));

		return $array;
	}

	function sort() {
		if (func_get_arg(0)) usort($this->__, func_get_arg(0));
		else asort($this->__);

		return $this;
	}

	function splice() {
		$array = new self;

		$args = array_replace(array(0, 0), func_get_args());
		$index = array_shift($args);
		$length = array_shift($args);

		call_user_func_array(array($array, 'push'), array_splice($this->__, $index, $length, $args));

		return $array;
	}

	function unshift() {
		array_splice($this->__, 0, 0, func_get_args());

		return $this->length;
	}
}

function jArray() {
	$array = new jArray();

	return $array->concat(func_get_args());
}

class jString extends jObject {
	// Private

	private $__ = null;

	private $__regex = '/^\/(.*)\/([gi]?)$/';
	private $__regex_global = '/\/g$/';

	function __init() {
		$this->__ = preg_replace('/([^\\\\])\\\\n/', '$1'.PHP_EOL, (string) func_get_arg(0));
	}

	function __toString () {
		return $this->__;
	}

	function __get($property) {
		if ($property === 'length') return strlen($this->__);

		if ($property > -1) return $this->charAt($property);

		return $this->$property;
	}

	// Public

	function charAt($index = 0) {
		return new self($this->__{$index});
	}

	function concat() {
		return new self(implode('', array_merge(array($this->__), func_get_args())));
	}

	function indexOf($needle = '') {
		return strpos($this->__, $needle);
	}

	function lastIndexOf($needle = '') {
		return strrpos($this->__, $needle);
	}

	function match($regexp = '') {
		$isGlobal = preg_match($this->__regex_global, $regexp);
		$hasMatch = $isGlobal ? preg_match_all(substr($regexp, 0, -1), $this->__, $matches, PREG_PATTERN_ORDER) : preg_match($regexp, $this->__, $matches);

		if ($hasMatch) {
			$array = new jArray();

			call_user_func_array(array($array, 'push'), $isGlobal ? $matches[0] : $matches);

			return $array;
		}
	}

	function replace($substr = '', $newsubstr = '') {
		if (is_callable($newsubstr)) return new self(preg_replace_callback($substr, function ($matches) use ($newsubstr) {
			foreach ($matches as &$match) $match = new self($match);

			return call_user_func_array($newsubstr, $matches);
		}, $this->__));

		if ($substr{0} !== '/') return new self(preg_replace($substr, $newsubstr, $this->__));

		return new self(str_replace($substr, $newsubstr, $this->__));
	}

	function search($regexp = '//') {
		$hasMatch = preg_match($regexp, $this->__, $match, PREG_OFFSET_CAPTURE);

		return $hasMatch ? $match[0][1] : -1;
	}

	function slice() {
		$args = array_replace(array(0, strlen($this->__)), func_get_args());
		$index = array_shift($args);
		$length = array_shift($args);

		return new self(substr($this->__, $index, $length));
	}

	function split($separater = '') {
		$array = new jArray();

		call_user_func_array(array($array, 'push'), preg_match($this->__regex, $separater) ? preg_split($separater, $this->__) : explode($separater, $this->__));

		return $array;
	}

	function substr() {
		$args = array_replace(array(0, strlen($this->__)), func_get_args());
		$index = array_shift($args);
		$length = array_shift($args);

		return new self(substr($this->__, $index, $length));
	}

	function toLowerCase() {
		return new self(strtolower($this->__));
	}

	function toUpperCase() {
		return new self(strtoupper($this->__));
	}

	function trim() {
		return new self(trim($this->__));
	}

	function trimLeft() {
		return new self(ltrim($this->__));
	}

	function trimRight() {
		return new self(rtrim($this->__));
	}
}

function jString($string = '') {
	return new jString($string);
}