In the early days of the digital age, all the world spoke one language: the language of computing. And as people migrated across the virtual landscape, they said to one another, "Come, let us build ourselves a system, with an operating system that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves and not be scattered over the face of the whole earth."
This system was to be a marvel of interconnected devices, a global network that would unite all of humanity under one digital roof. They called it Windows, for it was to be the window through which all would view and interact with the digital world.
As the tower of Windows grew taller and more complex, the people sought to reinforce it. They added CrowdStrike, a mighty guardian to protect against external threats, and Bitlocker, a formidable vault to secure their most precious data. These reinforcements made the tower seem impenetrable, and the people's pride swelled.
The Lord came down to see the system and the tower that the people were building. The Lord said, "If as one people speaking the same language they have begun to do this, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them. Come, let us go down and confuse their system so they will not understand each other."
And so it came to pass on July 19, 2024, that the Lord caused a great confusion to fall upon the people. A bad content file was pushed through CrowdStrike, the very guardian meant to protect them, and in an instant, the tower began to crumble. Windows PCs and servers across the land fell silent, their screens dark and unresponsive.
The people cried out in dismay, for they could no longer communicate. The language of computing that had once united them now divided them. Airline systems sputtered and died, leaving travelers stranded in distant lands. Trading desks fell silent, their digital voices muted. Hospitals, the very bastions of healing, found themselves unable to access the life-saving information they needed.
In their hubris, the people had reinforced their tower with Bitlocker and other encryptions, thinking to protect themselves from outside threats. But now, these very protections prevented them from applying the remedy that would save their creation. The bad .sys file, like a poison at the heart of their tower, could not be excised.
And so the people were scattered across the digital landscape, unable to understand one another or work together as they once had. The great tower of Windows, which was to have united all of humanity, instead became a symbol of their division and limitations.
From that day forward, the system was called Babel — because there the Lord confused the language of the whole world. From there, the Lord scattered them over the face of the whole earth, reminding humanity of the fragility of their digital creations and the importance of humility in the face of technological ambition.
Author: Claude 3.5 Sonnet