notawolf

CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH HOW COOL IT IS THAT NONE OF US ARE WOLVES LIVING ELABORATE LIES :notawolf:
I HATE SHARING HOLIDAYS WITH MY IN LAWS BECAUSE THEY  ASK SO MANY QUESTIONS LIKE WHAT IS YOUR JOB WHY DO YOU SMELL LIKE MEAT IS THAT BLOOD :notawolf:
I LOOK SO GOOD IN MY NEW SWEATER. NO ONE HAS SAID SO YET. BUT WHY ELSE WOULD EVERYONE AT APPLEBEES BE SCREAMING SO LOUD? UGH CHECK PLEASE :notawolf:
AT WHAT POINT IN THE BURRITO DOES MY UNENDING ANXIETY RECEDE …OR IS THAT NOT WHAT THESE ARE FOR :notawolf:
I ATE SO MUCH MASHED POTATOES THAT I FORGOT TO GO TO THE BANK TRULY THIS IS A DEEPLY RELATABLE PIECE OF HUMAN CONTENT :notawolf:
I LOVE OFFICE CULTURE. WE SHOULD TOUCH BASE. I WILL LOOP YOU IN. LET US CIRCLE BACK. I EAT BONES. SYNERGY. WHAT DID I JUST SAY EVEN :notawolf:
AH YES I HAVE ALL THE MIDDLE AGED HUMAN HEALTH PROBLEMS. TENNIS ELBOW. BUSINESS SHOULDER. THE KINGS SORENESS. BLOOD TEETH. ALSO DEPRESSION :notawolf:
AH YES NEW JOB. NEW CUBE. NEW COWORKERS. NEW DISCRETE CORNER IN WHICH TO MARK MY TERRITORY. OMG FREE COFFEE :notawolf:
OOH THE WEEKEND. KICK BACK AND RELAX. USE YOUR VERTICAL SPINE TO SIT CORRECTLY ON A BAR STOOL. USE HUMAN WORDS TO MAKE JOKES WITH THE BOYS :notawolf:
OOH YEAH LAZY SUNDAY. I CAN RELAX ANYTIME I WANT DUE TO MY LACK OF NATURAL PREDATORS. BUT TODAY I WILL RELAX EXTRA :notawolf:
AH WONDERFUL THE BRUNCH MENU. EXCUSE ME DO YOU HAPPEN TO SERVE FOURTEEN POUNDS OF RAW AND BLEEDING MEAT? OH SORRY. I MEANT AVOCADO TOAST :notawolf:
OH NO DO NOT SHOW ME BLOOD. BLOOD MAKES ME NAUSEOUS. NOT POWERFUL :notawolf:
I CANNOT WAIT FOR WINTER. TIME TO CURL UP WITH SOME HOT COCOA IN FRONT OF A FIRE. I CAN HOLD THE MUG CORRECTLY. I AM NOT SCARED OF THE FIRE :notawolf:
UGH PUBLIC TRANSIT IS THE WORST SO CRAMPED SO SMELLY EVERYONE ALWAYS SCREAMING WOLF ON THE TRAIN OH GOD OH MY GOD WOLF ON THE TRAIN :notawolf:
HELLO YES DOCTOR I HAD A QUESTION I AM EXPERIENCING A PERSISTENT DREAD? OH JUST PART OF THE HUMAN PACKAGE HUH OKAY COOL FUN LOVING THIS :notawolf:
MODERN DATING IS DIFFICULT DO I SWIPE RIGHT DO I SWIPE LEFT OR DO I JUST RETURN TO THE WOODS WHERE LIFE HAS ALWAYS MADE SENSE :notawolf:
YOU CANNOT GO HOME AGAIN BECAUSE HOME IS A FEELING TIED TO A BYGONE TIME AND PLACE. NOT BECAUSE THE WOODS YOU GREW UP IN ARE A MALL NOW :notawolf:
HOLY HELL HAVE YOU ALL TRIED PIZZA YET? I MEAN I CLEARLY HAVE THOUSANDS OF TIMES BUT GOOD GOD WHAT A THING :notawolf: