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What would you like to do?
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Hey, honey. Check out my latest innovation in tree decorating.
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I built a base that turns the tree so you can decorate it easier.
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I call it "The Tree-zy Susan".
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Yep. After just three weeks in the wood shop,
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Dad has shaved five minutes off our decorating time.
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I finished my Christmas wish list, Mommy.
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The trick to getting what you really want for Christmas
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is to first ask for the impossible.
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I throw in a "Mommy" or two to grease the wheels.
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I only want one thing, Mommy.
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Peace on earth, good will toward men.
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[Sighs] Sorry, I guess that's two things.
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Well, they're a little tough to wrap and put under the tree.
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What else is on your list?
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Well, I didn't think I'd need a backup, but I guess I could settle for...
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The Screaming Dragon remote pilot helicopter
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with a built-in 13-megapixel camera.
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Well, they're kind of expensive.
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But I think we can get you that helicopter.
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That's how you get 'er done, son.
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Oh, please. Letting Parker think he's "working us".
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Has become a Christmas tradition.
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Last year he asked us to fill in the hole in the ozone layer.
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He got a bike.
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Seriously? A helicopter?
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He's just gonna break it in the first 15 minutes.
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May as well flush your money down the toilet.
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Oh, wait, you can't.
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His remote control submarine already clogged it.
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Mm, I hadn't thought about that.
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Operation toilet dive was a search and rescue mission
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for the action figure I flushed the day before.
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Never leave a man behind.
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Yeah, you're not helping your case here.
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I hate to say it, but I think Joey's right.
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You're just too young for such a sophisticated toy.
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All I want for Christmas now is revenge.
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And the helicopter.
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And the peace on earth stuff, but mostly revenge.
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And the helicopter.
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Dad, come on. Joey's ruining Christmas.
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Do something.
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I'm a little tied up right now, buddy.
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Better in stereo.
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B... b... better in stereo.
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- I'm up with the sunshine. - Let's go.
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- I lace up my high tops. - Oh no.
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- Slam dunk. - Ready or not.
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Yeah, show me what you got.
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- I'm under the spotlight. - Holler.
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I dare you, come on and follow.
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You dance to your own beat. I'll sing the melody.
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When you say yea-ah-ah.
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I say no-oh-oh.
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When you say stop.
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All I want to do is go, go, go.
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You, you, the other half of me, me.
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The half I'll never be.
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The half that drives me crazy.
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You, you, the better half of me, me.
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The half I'll always need.
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But we both know.
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We're better in stereo...
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Oh, I am so excited that you're headlining channel four's holiday spectacular.
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Partly because it's great for the town,
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but mostly because I'd already told the committee you'd say yes.
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I mean, how can I say no?
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This is where it all began eight years ago.
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My little baby's first time out on stage singing her little heart out.
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I still remember how you wowed the crowd with "Frosty the Snowman".
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And "White Christmas".
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And "Little Drummer Boy".
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By the time you'd finished "O Little Town of Bethlehem,"
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I felt like I'd walked there myself.
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I never wanted it to end.
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And it almost didn't.
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Liv Rooney?
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Hi. I'm Jenny Keene.
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Hi. You are the adorable little girl that I get
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to share the stage with this Christmas Eve.
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I watched your audition tape, and you have some serious pipes, young lady.
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It feels so good to be talented, doesn't it?
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I want to be just like you when I grow up.
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Well, you are certainly on the right track.
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Eight years ago, I was you.
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I was a starry-eyed little girl, excited to make her first TV appearance.
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[Giggles]
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And I mean, after this show, my life changed forever.
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It's true. Without it, Liv never would have been cast
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in a local commercial as Mandy, the singing muffler.
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[Clears throat]
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Mandy says your muffler is a-okay.
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- [Clicks teeth] - [Chuckles]
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We still get a discount.
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But I didn't really have anyone to guide me, so I wanted to be that for you.
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You know, this industry can get kind of tough, and it's good to have a mentor.
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I can't believe Liv Rooney's going to be my celebrity mentor.
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Oh, stop. Celebrity mentor?
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[Chuckles] You don't have to say that...
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I mean, you definitely can. I'm not gonna stop you.
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Ho ho ho.
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No no no.
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Dude, what's with the suit?
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I have a plan to turn Christmas cheer into Christmas ka-ching.
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Ka-ching just bought you 15 seconds.
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Impress me.
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Okay, so they do that holiday spectacular tree lighting ceremony
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in the park next to Ridgewood High.
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But do you know what they don't have?
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Seven more seconds to impress me?
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A Santa stand.
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Adorable kids plus sentimental parents equals cold hard cash.
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Whoa. You actually had a good idea.
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It's a Christmas miracle.
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Well I spent too much on Christmas presents this year and I owe Dad some money.
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I need your help. So...
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You in?
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Keep your friends close and your jerky brother closer.
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If I can't play with the helicopter until I break it,
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I'm gonna play with Joey until I break him.
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A little quality time with my big bro on Christmas Eve?
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- You bet. - [Chuckles]
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This is channel four meteorologist Johnny Nimbus!
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Coming at you live from the sight of tomorrow's holiday spectacular.
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And I'm here alongside Pete Rooney,
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the Chairman of the Stevens Point tree lighting committee.
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Now, Pete, I see a tree, not a lot of lights.
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Don't leave us in the dark. [Laughs]
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Classic Nimbus.
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But seriously, what have you got planned?
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Are we on the air now, like, now now?
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Now?
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Hi.
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Uh, yeah we're live to over 50,000 viewers.
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Although I think that number drops every second
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you stand there like a frozen snowman.
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Excuse me, Johnny. Hi. I'm Maddie Rooney, co-chair.
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And think I could shed some light on that.
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[Laughs]
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Classic Maddie. [Sighs]
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So we envision a tree completely lit by candles.
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And we call it "Christmas unplugged".
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Hmm. "Christmas unplugged".
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Well, last year the Griswold family lit their tree with lasers
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and then they had a stealth bomber fly over and drop tinsel, but hey...
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I guess not everybody has to try.
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- So... - Uh, wait.
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You didn't let me finish.
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We were going to do the thing that I just said, but then we changed our
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minds and came up with something bigger and better and more awesome-er.
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All right. That's what Stevens Point wants to hear.
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Come on, give me the deets. What have you got planned?
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Merry Christmas.
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Well, Johnny, I think we're trying to keep
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our master plan kind of under wraps right now.
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But I can promise you that the Rooney tree is going to be
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the biggest and the best that Stevens Point has ever seen.
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Bam, what?!
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Oh-ho!
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All right. You heard it from Maddie Rooney.
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Boom, zap!
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So don't forget to come on down tomorrow night and see this amazing tree!
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In the snow!
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That's right. Rebel meteorologist Johnny Nimbus is ignoring the mega doppler radar,
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and every other station in town to guarantee you!
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A white Christmas.
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Nimbus out.
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- Great job, kid. - Thanks.
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[Groans]
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What did I just do?
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I just promised that we could top the Griswolds' tinsel flyby.
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Why did I just promise that?
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Next time, just let me do the talking.
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Ho ho ho, who wouldn't go?
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Ho ho ho, who wouldn't go?
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Up on the housetop click click click.
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Down through the chimney with good Saint Nick.
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[Squeals]
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Jenny, that was so great.
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That means everything coming from you, Liv.
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Well between this duet and Liv's solo,
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this is going to be the best tree lighting ceremony ever.
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Oh, thank you, Mrs. Rooney, for your wonderful flute playing.
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It's like listening to beauty share a hug with Grace.
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Well, thank you, Jenny.
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You know, I was a bit of a triple threat in high school myself.
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Flute, baton twirling, and flag spinning.
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Pep squad in the house.
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Once you've mastered the flag twirl...
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You never forget.
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It's in my bones.
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Well, I'm gonna go check on dinner.
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Now you girls keep practicing. You sound great.
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Aw. Everyone sounds great when they're singing with Liv.
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[Giggles]
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Because you sound like a dying walrus.
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[Chuckles]
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You are just too sweet.
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Wait, what?
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Listen up, blondie.
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I'm making some changes starting with this stupid outfit.
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I'm the star of the show. I should have the cool dress!
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Um...
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I'm pretty sure I'm the star of the show. I am the one lighting the tree,
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oh, and also I'm the one who had her own hit TV show.
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If you try to steal my spotlight, I will chew you up and spit you out.
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Mrs. Rooney.
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Could you drive me home? I promised Mommy I'd read to grandpa tonight.
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Well, you are just too good to be true.
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Sure, I was just gonna get some things for dinner. Let's go.
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Not before I get a hug from Liv.
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[Giggles]
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Watch your back.
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Oh.
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That girl is such an Angel. She insisted that I give you these cookies.
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[Gasps] Mom! Don't eat those.
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Now I know we watch our carbs around the holidays, but what was that?
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Jenny Keene is a monster.
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Yeah.
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One minute it's "beauty sharing a hug with Grace".
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And the next it's "watch your back".
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Honey, that can't be true.
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During the ride home, she sang me "the 12 days of Christmas"...
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Complimented my shoes, and offered me gas money.
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Ha! She's a liar. Your shoes are hideous.
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Honey...
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Imagine how scared that little girl must be to share a spotlight with Liv Rooney.
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Yeah. [Chuckles] I guess you're right.
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Must be so cold there in my shadow.
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Look, this is what being a mentor is all about.
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That little girl needs your guidance.
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I guess everybody gets nervous in different ways.
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You know some people chew their fingernails,
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and other people turn into a Demon spawn.
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Well, let's cheer ourselves up.
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We can watch the clip of your Dad freezing up on the news again.
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- Merry Christmas. - [Both laugh]
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Status update, Dad?
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I've strung seven and a half miles of tree lights,
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hardwired her into the main power grid to the school,
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and duct taped 19 power strips together.
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[Grunts]
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- We are gonna blow the Griswolds away. - [Grunts]
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Hey. Check out the awesome tree topper I found.
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You... [chuckles]
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You might need these.
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Whoa.
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Every superhero in the world is gonna report to Stevens Point this Christmas Eve.
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Go Rooneys.
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[Grunts] Yeah.
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Run along now. Merry Christmas.
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I have to hand it to you, setting up right next to the park was genius.
259
00:13:33,320 --> 00:13:37,309
Why don't you run over there and round up some more customers, my good Elf?
260
00:13:37,310 --> 00:13:40,610
You got it, Mr. Kringle.
261
00:13:41,341 --> 00:13:47,241
Oh, how I wanted to shove fake snow in that stupid jolly face of his.
262
00:13:47,277 --> 00:13:49,492
But first, I was gonna mess with him.
263
00:13:49,493 --> 00:13:52,804
And frankly, the tips were great.
264
00:13:52,805 --> 00:13:55,205
Whoa-ho-ho!
265
00:13:55,703 --> 00:13:59,363
Santa's lap is not a toilet.
266
00:14:00,148 --> 00:14:02,713
That is like the fifth kid to do that.
267
00:14:02,714 --> 00:14:04,983
What is going on here?
268
00:14:04,984 --> 00:14:06,567
Free apple cider.
269
00:14:06,568 --> 00:14:12,468
Remember, you cannot get on Santa's lap until you drink every last drop.
270
00:14:14,828 --> 00:14:16,558
Good...
271
00:14:16,559 --> 00:14:18,831
Evening, Stevens Point!
272
00:14:18,832 --> 00:14:19,865
And...
273
00:14:19,866 --> 00:14:23,936
Welcome to the channel four tree lighting holiday spectacular.
274
00:14:23,937 --> 00:14:26,168
Brought to you by Greenstein's Bagels...
275
00:14:26,169 --> 00:14:28,681
Your schmear for Christmas cheer.
276
00:14:28,682 --> 00:14:30,109
Mmm!
277
00:14:30,110 --> 00:14:33,250
Delicious. Hey, everybody, I'm Johnny Nimbus.
278
00:14:33,251 --> 00:14:37,918
The only weatherman guaranteeing you a white Christmas.
279
00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:40,785
That's right. No other channel's predicting snow.
280
00:14:40,786 --> 00:14:43,823
- Why you gotta hate, channel eight? - [Laughs]
281
00:14:43,824 --> 00:14:44,991
Cue my snow.
282
00:14:44,992 --> 00:14:46,793
- Come on. - [Applause]
283
00:14:46,794 --> 00:14:49,374
Here it comes.
284
00:14:49,617 --> 00:14:53,145
Any minute now. All right, it's coming, folks.
285
00:14:53,146 --> 00:14:56,834
Don't worry about it, but hey, right now, I want you to give it
286
00:14:56,835 --> 00:14:59,454
up for hometown sweetheart Liv Rooney!
287
00:14:59,455 --> 00:15:02,755
And newcomer Jenny Keene.
288
00:15:03,306 --> 00:15:06,309
Up on the housetop reindeer pause.
289
00:15:06,310 --> 00:15:09,752
Out jumps good old Santa Claus.
290
00:15:09,753 --> 00:15:12,853
Down through the chimney with lots of toys.
291
00:15:12,854 --> 00:15:16,625
All for the little ones, Christmas joys.
292
00:15:16,626 --> 00:15:19,365
How dare that ungrateful little reindeer
293
00:15:19,366 --> 00:15:22,584
come out wearing the same cutie claus outfit as me.
294
00:15:22,585 --> 00:15:25,093
And look cuter than me in it.
295
00:15:25,094 --> 00:15:28,556
Ho ho ho, who wouldn't go?
296
00:15:28,557 --> 00:15:31,616
Ho ho ho, who wouldn't go?
297
00:15:31,617 --> 00:15:34,874
Up on the housetop, click click click.
298
00:15:34,875 --> 00:15:38,549
Down through the chimney with good Saint Nick.
299
00:15:38,550 --> 00:15:41,982
Oops. I think I just landed myself on the naughty list.
300
00:15:41,983 --> 00:15:45,316
Ho ho ho, who wouldn't go?
301
00:15:45,317 --> 00:15:48,622
Ho ho ho, who wouldn't go?
302
00:15:48,623 --> 00:15:51,824
Up on the housetop, click click click.
303
00:15:51,825 --> 00:15:55,794
Down through the chimney with good Saint Nick.
307
00:16:07,614 --> 00:16:12,821
I don't know when you and Jenny worked out that comedy routine, but it was hysterical.
308
00:16:12,822 --> 00:16:14,125
[Laughs]
309
00:16:14,126 --> 00:16:17,038
No, that wasn't planned. She was trying to destroy me.
310
00:16:17,039 --> 00:16:22,015
[Snorts] Come on, Liv. That sweet little girl was not trying to destroy you.
311
00:16:22,016 --> 00:16:26,649
Did you all not just see the candy cane beat down?
312
00:16:26,650 --> 00:16:29,820
She was doing absolutely everything she could to make me look bad.
313
00:16:29,821 --> 00:16:31,956
Give her a break, Liv.
314
00:16:31,957 --> 00:16:33,945
Do you not remember how you were at her age?
315
00:16:33,946 --> 00:16:37,726
I was not a monster like that.
316
00:16:38,107 --> 00:16:42,818
- I have to go get wardrobe. - Got to work on that tree.
317
00:16:42,819 --> 00:16:45,799
- [Camera shutter clicks] - [Sighs]
318
00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:48,080
Ho ho ho.
319
00:16:49,565 --> 00:16:52,843
So you are the last kid on Santa's lap.
320
00:16:52,844 --> 00:16:54,194
What are you gonna do?
321
00:16:54,195 --> 00:16:55,858
Pee on me, spit in my face,
322
00:16:55,859 --> 00:16:58,683
pour itching powder down my suit, throw my glasses in the bushes?
323
00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:02,464
I have seen it all today, kid.
324
00:17:03,254 --> 00:17:05,991
Just pick one and do it quick.
325
00:17:05,992 --> 00:17:08,032
[Blows]
326
00:17:09,861 --> 00:17:13,133
Blowing your nose in my beard was not an option.
327
00:17:13,134 --> 00:17:15,774
Get off of me.
328
00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:18,802
[Groans]
329
00:17:20,336 --> 00:17:22,191
Parker, there you are.
330
00:17:22,192 --> 00:17:25,252
Here's 10 bucks. Add it to the pot. How much did we end up with?
331
00:17:25,253 --> 00:17:30,265
Including the 10 bucks, that would be... [mouths]
332
00:17:30,266 --> 00:17:32,486
10 bucks.
333
00:17:33,231 --> 00:17:37,310
What? They've been handing you money all afternoon. Where did it go?
334
00:17:37,311 --> 00:17:41,059
I'm sorry. I meant 10 bucks and this.
335
00:17:41,060 --> 00:17:43,820
[Helicopter whirs]
336
00:17:49,451 --> 00:17:52,705
One Screaming Dragon helicopter.
337
00:17:52,706 --> 00:17:57,709
You used all of our Santa money and bought yourself the helicopter?
338
00:17:57,710 --> 00:18:00,639
I also paid kids to pee on you, spit in your face,
339
00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:06,540
pour itching powder down your suit, and throw your glasses into the bushes.
340
00:18:06,617 --> 00:18:07,807
Why?
341
00:18:07,808 --> 00:18:11,691
Because Mom was gonna get that helicopter for me until you wrecked my dream.
342
00:18:11,692 --> 00:18:13,419
Welcome to Christmas revenge.
343
00:18:13,420 --> 00:18:16,960
Ho-ho-how you like me now?
344
00:18:17,631 --> 00:18:23,531
The only reason I did this Santa stand was so I could pay off your Christmas present.
345
00:18:24,721 --> 00:18:25,746
[Grunts]
346
00:18:25,747 --> 00:18:28,956
I talked Mom out of getting you that helicopter...
347
00:18:28,957 --> 00:18:32,917
Because I already got it for you.
348
00:18:33,548 --> 00:18:37,014
I'm sorry, munch. I had no idea you cared.
349
00:18:37,015 --> 00:18:40,253
Me either. I guess it's just the Christmas spirit.
350
00:18:40,254 --> 00:18:42,414
Come on.
351
00:18:44,111 --> 00:18:49,911
Are you hugging me because you love me, or because you're covered in kid pee?
352
00:18:49,912 --> 00:18:53,392
Mm, why can't it be both?
353
00:18:54,718 --> 00:18:57,669
'Twas the night before Christmas!
354
00:18:57,670 --> 00:19:00,021
And all through the park...
355
00:19:00,022 --> 00:19:03,677
There are a bunch of people saying "hey, Johnny, why's that tree still dark?"
356
00:19:03,678 --> 00:19:05,913
- Huh? - [Applause]
357
00:19:05,914 --> 00:19:09,175
All right, folks. Well, before our big show-stopping solo,
358
00:19:09,176 --> 00:19:12,099
Liv Rooney has the honor of lighting that tree.
359
00:19:12,100 --> 00:19:15,399
So let's get her out here, huh? Come on.
360
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:17,620
[Cheering]
361
00:19:18,914 --> 00:19:21,063
[Chuckles, clears throat]
362
00:19:21,064 --> 00:19:25,295
Thank you, Johnny. Lighting this tree is a great honor...
363
00:19:25,296 --> 00:19:28,782
But it is one that I would like to pass on to the young and...
364
00:19:28,783 --> 00:19:30,988
Very talented Jenny Keene.
365
00:19:30,989 --> 00:19:32,666
This is her moment.
366
00:19:32,667 --> 00:19:34,887
[Applause]
367
00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:41,096
Maybe all Jenny needed was that one person to truly care about her
368
00:19:41,097 --> 00:19:45,680
so that she could blossom into the greatest version of herself.
369
00:19:45,681 --> 00:19:48,623
Get off my stage, blondie.
370
00:19:48,624 --> 00:19:50,784
[Giggles]
371
00:19:51,155 --> 00:19:53,855
Okay. Maybe not.
372
00:19:54,353 --> 00:19:58,013
Merry Christmas, Stevens Point.
373
00:20:00,401 --> 00:20:01,535
[Cheering, exclaims]
374
00:20:01,536 --> 00:20:03,696
Ha! Yes!
375
00:20:03,845 --> 00:20:05,885
Ha ha.
376
00:20:10,090 --> 00:20:15,310
Uh, Dad, is that supposed to be smoking like that?
377
00:20:21,071 --> 00:20:26,782
Well, it looks like little Jenny Keene just ruined Christmas.
378
00:20:26,783 --> 00:20:31,223
Christmas Tree down. Christmas Tree down!
379
00:20:31,633 --> 00:20:35,014
Liv Rooney, you set me up!
380
00:20:35,015 --> 00:20:37,485
She ruined my big moment.
381
00:20:37,486 --> 00:20:41,746
I hate this town, and everyone in it!
382
00:20:44,056 --> 00:20:46,943
And that, ladies and gentlemen...
383
00:20:46,944 --> 00:20:51,464
Was little Jenny Keene's impression of Ebenezer Scrooge.
384
00:20:51,465 --> 00:20:53,689
Yay, Jenny. [Chuckles]
385
00:20:53,690 --> 00:20:57,749
Oh, what a talented little actress, am I right?
386
00:20:57,750 --> 00:21:01,890
So that's probably it for the show.
387
00:21:04,098 --> 00:21:06,738
Merry Christmas?
388
00:21:10,128 --> 00:21:11,853
Oh. Wow.
389
00:21:11,854 --> 00:21:15,154
She really is a monster.
390
00:21:15,741 --> 00:21:19,268
Yeah, I told you, Mom. She is way worse than I was.
391
00:21:19,269 --> 00:21:22,929
It's Christmas, Sweetie. Sure.
392
00:21:23,715 --> 00:21:26,098
Well, I guess the show's over.
393
00:21:26,099 --> 00:21:29,442
- It's a bummer. - Oh, I know, honey. I was...
394
00:21:29,443 --> 00:21:33,139
I was really looking forward to your big solo.
395
00:21:33,140 --> 00:21:34,642
Don't give up yet.
396
00:21:34,643 --> 00:21:38,612
I think Dad and I may have actually found a way to save Christmas.
397
00:21:38,613 --> 00:21:41,793
Get ready for "Christmas unplugged".
398
00:21:41,794 --> 00:21:43,248
[Squeals]
399
00:21:43,249 --> 00:21:45,577
And Liv gets to sing "let it snow".
400
00:21:45,578 --> 00:21:50,618
That is the only song you'll be singing, right?
401
00:21:50,784 --> 00:21:53,424
[Guitar playing]
402
00:21:53,956 --> 00:21:57,463
Oh, the weather outside is frightful.
403
00:21:57,464 --> 00:22:01,200
But the fire is so delightful.
404
00:22:01,201 --> 00:22:04,537
And since we've no place to go...
405
00:22:04,538 --> 00:22:08,157
Let it snow, let it snow. Let it snow.
406
00:22:08,158 --> 00:22:09,948
[Flute playing]
407
00:22:09,949 --> 00:22:13,139
Oh, it doesn't show signs of stopping.
408
00:22:13,140 --> 00:22:17,080
And I've bought some corn for popping.
409
00:22:17,081 --> 00:22:20,193
The lights are turned way down low.
410
00:22:20,194 --> 00:22:24,934
Let it snow, let it snow. Let it snow...
411
00:22:25,225 --> 00:22:28,139
Even though it didn't snow, it's kind of the perfect Christmas Eve, huh?
412
00:22:28,140 --> 00:22:31,573
Yeah, except I already broke my helicopter.
413
00:22:31,574 --> 00:22:33,217
Well, at least you have a backup.
414
00:22:33,218 --> 00:22:36,188
Nope, broke that one too.
415
00:22:36,189 --> 00:22:39,506
All the way home I'll be warm.
416
00:22:39,507 --> 00:22:42,661
The fire is slowly dying.
417
00:22:42,662 --> 00:22:46,621
And my dear, we're still goodbye-ing.
418
00:22:46,622 --> 00:22:49,798
But as long as you love me so.
419
00:22:49,799 --> 00:22:54,419
Let it snow, let it snow. Let it snow.
420
00:22:56,975 --> 00:22:59,195
[Cheering]
421
00:23:00,013 --> 00:23:02,805
All right, listen. Good night, everybody.
422
00:23:02,806 --> 00:23:05,963
I know it didn't snow, but at least it didn't rain, right?
423
00:23:05,964 --> 00:23:09,804
- [Thunder crashes] - [All groan]
424
00:23:10,789 --> 00:23:13,729
Are you kidding me?
425
00:23:21,302 --> 00:23:24,292
Uh, Parker, Dad, come quick before it stops.
426
00:23:24,293 --> 00:23:27,472
- What is it, son? - Is it snowing on Christmas?
427
00:23:27,473 --> 00:23:29,513
Better.
428
00:23:32,330 --> 00:23:34,430
[Laughs]
429
00:23:41,375 --> 00:23:43,401
I got her those for Christmas.
430
00:23:43,402 --> 00:23:46,327
Oh, thank you, Father.
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